Christina Aguilera To Put Big Boobs To Professional Use

According to Variety, peroxided songstress Christina Aguilera will be starring in her own version of “Showgirls”: “Burlesque.” Watch out “Striptease”! Aguilera will play an “ambitious small-town girl with a big voice who finds love, family and success in a Los Angeles neo-burlesque club that appears to be right out of Bob Fosse’s ‘Cabaret.’” That’s weird. That’s the story of my life. (Call my lawyer!) The script was written by Steve Antin, brother of Robin Antin, who created the Pussycat Dolls, and Jonathan Antin, who does famous people’s hair. Twenty bucks says Aguilera’s character will work at Forty Deuce, home of that LA neo-burlesque to which they are referring. Luckily, like Demi in “Striptease” before her, Aguilera’s got the knockers for this thong, pasties, and feathers role. Let’s just hope she don’t have a “Glitter” on her hands. [Dlisted]