Australians Want To Ban Small-Breasted Women And Female Ejaculation In Porn

The Australian government apparently has some issues with a woman’s “down under.” The Classification Board for the country’s smut industry is working on banning porn that includes female ejaculation and/or small breasts. The censors are trying to block any websites that include or link to material that include these particular “offenders.” Customs officials are also being advised to confiscate any pornography that has instances of female ejaculation. So, I guess now would be an ideal time to look into becoming an Australian Customs Official since screening smut could be part of your job description? But this is not the most outrageous element of this new ban—what’s worse is the reasoning.

According to Fiona Patten, of the Australian Sex Party, this is not the first time that the country has tried to give small-breasted women the boot.  The issue was ignited several years ago when a senator claimed that small breasts encouraged pedophilia in viewers. So apparently, I should be concerned about my boyfriend preferring the company of children just because I can barely fill a B-cup?

The reasoning behind the ban on female ejaculation is “golden” … literally. Based on Classification Guidelines for pornography in Australia, female ejaculation is a form of urination which falls under the label of the already prohibited act of “golden showers.” If that isn’t enough, the Classification Guidelines also claim that female ejaculation is an “abhorrent” depiction. To me this is argument comparable to (and just as legally sound as) a grade school boy claiming that girls are smelly. The Australian Sex Party summed up ignorance and just plain ridiculousness of these justifications, arguing: “There are over one million sites featuring female ejaculation and for Australia to be banning depictions and discussion of this important issue, takes us back into the Victorian era where they didn’t even believe that women could have orgasms.” [The Register, Jezebel]