21 Sexy Christmas Presents That Are Just Wrong

Posted by: Simcha Whitehill Filed in: galleries, sex
11:29AM, Thursday December 3rd 2009

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rub my duckie

FYI Duckie marketers: If your bread and butter is discreet vibrators, ones that you hand on your Christmas tree kinda blow your cover. [I Rub My Duckie® Vibrator Santa Holiday Ornament, $22.39, BigTeazeToys.com]

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Tags: sex toys, products, christmas

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dizzy

wrote on December 3, 2009 @ 5:42 PM

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Bwahaha. I think the mistletoe underwear is hilarious and I would not say nay to them being in my stocking. Victoria's Secret every year sells sexy Santa's little helper outfits and I don't think that the novelty underwear is much different.

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"Secret Story Time"

wrote on December 3, 2009 @ 5:53 PM

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Adult mistle toe and Old St. Prick? Those would be great gag gifts for grownups!How can you say they are "just wrong?"I like those a lot!Secretia (Secret Story Time0

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H. Blue

wrote on December 3, 2009 @ 5:57 PM

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I, too, would love some mistletoe underwear.. but not in those creepy boob and penis stockings. The other stuff was hilarious, those, for some reason I found disturbing.

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littlemissemperor

wrote on December 3, 2009 @ 6:39 PM

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wait, the mistletoe underwear is MUSICAL?! that's awful.

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J.D. Bauchery

wrote on December 3, 2009 @ 8:58 PM

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I agree to disagree... http://hotmoviesforher.com/9345/den-of-d-bauchery/holy-hot-holiday-themed-toys/

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marykerry

wrote on December 3, 2009 @ 9:04 PM

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Wait a second! Isn't that Ralph Lauren sweater the same that Kimora Lee's new hubby is wearing in their Christmas card photo? The one mentioned in the Star Couplings!http://www.mediatakeout.com/2009/37291-christmas_fabulosity_we_got_our_hands_on_the_pic_that_kimora_and_djimon_are_using_for_their_christmas_cards.html

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lawyrgrl

wrote on December 3, 2009 @ 11:45 PM

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@H. Blue Maybe you found the stockings disturbing because the penis looked remarkably like a squid? And I am pretty sure that the person who designed the boobs has never actually see a real pair!That said, I do kind of like the "I'm a Ho, Ho, Ho" T-shirt! My fiance does this whole "I'm gonna introduce you to people as my ho! You are my property woman!" thing to tease me. Sounds juvenile I know but it generally involves tickling and giggles. (OK - totally juvenile but it is funny!) I could pretend that I was wearing the t-shirt to his stuffy Holiday party!

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Simcha Whitehill

wrote on December 3, 2009 @ 11:54 PM

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@MaryKerry OMG Totally is! Guess Kimora's got the $$$$

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ohhfoggylullaby

wrote on December 3, 2009 @ 11:58 PM

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I really want that moose hat...but I know I would never leave my house in it. Also, the kinky snowmen ornament was pretty funny, I'd love to see the look on my mother's face if I hung that on our tree...

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Anniushka

wrote on December 4, 2009 @ 12:51 AM

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I love the moose hat. Not that I would wear it, but my opinion of some people would be better if they did.

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Jillybean

wrote on December 4, 2009 @ 2:16 AM

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The boob stocking looked more like testicles. I could certainly see myself buying some of this stuff - I got my Mum a candy festive penis one year and we placed it on the top of the tree. Then the catholic side of the family came round . . .

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Mod Potter

wrote on December 4, 2009 @ 4:57 AM

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My grandparents have a ornament just like the Reindeer Sex Ornament. Ugh.

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So sly

wrote on December 4, 2009 @ 8:46 AM

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lol. These are hilarious. I wish my family weren't so uptight because everyone needs to lighten up and laugh during the holidays. Even at the tacky stuff. Geez.

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canadiancutie

wrote on December 4, 2009 @ 11:43 PM

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That main picture reminded me so much of Lady Gaga's brilliant Christmas song. "Ho, Ho, Ho/Under the mistletoe..."

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Izzy

wrote on December 5, 2009 @ 3:47 AM

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The ornaments (with the exception of the solitary hanging boob) aren't really creepy. They're actually really funny and would make a funny gag gift for girlfriends.

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CheezeDoodles

wrote on December 5, 2009 @ 2:23 PM

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I LOVE THE MOOSE HAT!!! I would wear that all the time! Sucks that it appears to be sold out. I love mooses (word mangling is intentional).The boobie ornaments are...ODD. Kinda boring, really. Hear Christmas guests say things like: "you have a titty on your tree." Naaaah.The Frosty toy? I can't do [i][b]that [/b][/i]with Frosty! That's just wrong! He should never be party to activities like that. He's pure as the driven...well, you get my drift...The bondage snowmen ornament--to quote Larry the Cable Guy, "I don't care who y'are, that's FUNNY." Might have to get one of those.

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symone

wrote on December 7, 2009 @ 7:16 AM

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I would totally buy the boning snowman ornament!! That would definitely earn me some looks from my family...And I simply could not befriend frosty the snowman wand. I mean, the damn thing has eyes, and any sex toy with eyes would creep me out.

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caseyj

wrote on March 8, 2010 @ 3:57 PM

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I want the moose hat!!!

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