13 Reasons She Doesn't Want A Second Date

Jessica Wakeman
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 01:25 pm: [report]

Talking about how much money he makes on a date is also AWFUL. I once went on a date with a guy who was a corporate lawyer and he told me on the first date that he made over $200k a year. That’s great, but who really asked you?!?!

Riley
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 01:29 pm: [report]

@Jessica - I have had women ask me that before. Complete turn-off. Talking about money like that is rarely appropriate.

PinkRanger
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 01:34 pm: [report]

#12 is huge for me! I can’t stand when people are rude to anyone in the service industry *unless of course they are being rude first, and there is an appropriate way to handle those situations*

Plus just an overall fake attitude….my biggest pet peeve is when people aren’t genuine.

tk_2009
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 01:36 pm: [report]

I used to be a member of eHarmony (and didn’t like it) and the first match it returned was hilarious: her occupation was listed as “bird watcher/food taster” and in the things she was looking for in a potential SO she listed “emotional and financial support.” Apparently watching birds and eating food is not so lucrative. Talking money generally renders any other sentiment disingenuous. Tre, tre dégueulasse.

Coral
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 01:38 pm: [report]

@Jessica: I so agree. Guys who openly discuss that seem like they are looking to buy love, because they don’t know how to truly love someone. And women who ask such questions are the ones who want to be bought with presents.

_jsw_
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 01:40 pm: [report]

1. You’re Way Too Into Me

I think this is a deal-breaker for either party on a date, especially a first one. Sure, you should be interested, but not stalkerish or broadcasting “desperate”.

2. You Got Too Drunk
3. You Got Grabby
4. Bad Table Manners

These all show disrespect in one way or another, and that should always be a deal-breaker.

5. You Didn’t Offer To Buy My First Drink

Hopefully, this has all been hashed out in “the other thread.” I think it’s hard to argue that a guy who has asked you out should buy you a drink (should you want one). I’d argue it’s just as bad if they insist that you have one.

6. You Twittered In My Presence

This might be OK if the date includes you in on it and gets your consent. I see it as a risky thing, but it could turn out well.

7. No Eye Contact

One possibility: you have something in your nose/teeth/etc. That’s always a tough thing to discuss on first dates.

8. You Make Lots Of Big Declarative Statements About What You’re Looking For

Agreed. Even if there is a “checklist,” someone with even moderate conversational skills should be able to get the information by talking with you, not by telling you how it needs to be.

9. You Called Your Ex-Girlfriend “Crazy”

Well, you know, sometimes when she shows up in the chicken suit throwing monkey feces, you need to say something. But, otherwise, agreed.

10. You Didn’t Bring Anything To The Conversation

Yup. There should be some distinction between your date and a mannequin.

11. Dress To Impress

I think many guys can get away with dressing to not disappoint. Many of us, when trying to dress to impress, don’t always pull it off well.

12. You Were Rude To The Waiter/Waitress

Another sign of disrespect.

13. I Remind You Of ...

Yeah, these comparisons can wait until you meet the family/friends. Then they will point it out.

bogart4017
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 01:44 pm: [report]

except for #5 these could be applied to women as well. I’ve certainly had my share of #2. (having to carry you home and tuck you in?-priceless!!)
I’ve also had one or two be rude to the wait staff. They were escorted home post haste. Ladies usually we are taking you to a place we’re familiar with and may know the staff. We want to come back. Be nice.
If #13 applies saying it just once is fine. Then leave it alone. I have the type of face that always reminds somebody of somebody so no matter where i go i get “you look just like..”. Its bad enough coming from one person one time but one date i had spent the entire evening comparing me to her cousin “Gary”. Fail.

Kathls
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 01:56 pm: [report]

@_jsw_ : What a perfect description! I hate dates with mannequins . incredibly awkward for both parties, especially the one trying to keep up the conversation. Nothing like having a conversation with yourself on a date while the other person sits with a deer-in-headlights expression.

slip
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 02:01 pm: [report]

My face is turning red.

For all of the other guys who’ve done some of these things, of course.

Slip

BedRocka
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 02:23 pm: [report]

Luvtara ... some pent up aggression huh ... why so serious???

lpaul
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 02:45 pm: [report]

Reasons 14-16(ish) She Doesn’t Want a Second Date

I was set up with a friend of a friend who took me out to dinner and a movie. The date went pretty well; he seemed a little dumb, but I was willing to get to know him better. We went to his place after the movie to have a drink. I guess by “drink” he meant Red Bull and proceeded to spend the next 20 minutes showing me how much he could bench press. He kept adding weight until I told him that I had to be up early in the morning. My favorite part of the evening was running into his roommate/mom on the porch as I was leaving. Best date of my life…

I Go To 11
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 03:16 pm: [report]

Can I add another rule: “just generally being disgusting”? I’m so grossed out by guys that clean their ears with their car keys. In public. On a first date. Eeeewwwww.

For #12: I’ll paraphrase Dave Barry by saying that someone who’s rude to a service industry employee is NOT a nice person, and that this rule of thumb always turns out to be true. (I’ll follow it with pinkranger’s earlier disclaimer.)

*sam*
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 03:43 pm: [report]

oooh, how about:

14. You asked me out to a movie, didn’t offer to pick me up, but rather had me ‘meet you there’ instead, and “paid” for the tickets using a gift certificate. You didn’t offer to get something to eat before or after the movie, and then acted annoyed when I offered to get us some popcorn/drinks because you were too worried that we weren’t going to get the ‘right’ seats…

it screams:
a) cheap—you don’t need to spend a fortune on me, but at least make me feel like I’m worth the effort
b) pessimistic—like you already know you’re a loser and I won’t be interested in seeing you again, so why even bother spending a dime that evening anyway?
c) paranoid—if you’re too worried about getting your favorite seats to wait for me while I put forth the little extra effort to buy us snacks/drinks, then what else will I have to give up to ease your obvious anxieties??

FTR: this is a *true* dating story of mine… Don’t get me wrong, the guy was a total sweet heart, but, he always seemed to put more of an effort into not spending money or putting forth an actual effort than trying to impress me at all… that and he was a **terrible** kisser.—yes, even after his pathetic ‘dating’ skills, since we met through friends and he came highly recommended, I at least gave him the chance to redeem himself with a goodnight kiss. *sigh*

PinkRanger
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 04:35 pm: [report]

@luvtara: right on! Dating should be a partnership. Not sure what the big deal is about meeting him there and the gift certificates. I don’t know if you’ve heard, but we’re in a recession, does that mean that dating should be thrown out the window too?

pragmatryst
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 04:50 pm: [report]

“You Got Grabby…”

Yeah, and honestly I’m still not sure why I got shot down. I was wearing my favorite “Blonde, The Other White Meat” lucky T-shirt so you should have been putty in my hands.

*sam*
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 05:49 pm: [report]

@luvtara & pinkranger: I know that post came off sounding a bit prissy and demanding but first let me say that this was only a taste of this guys oddities. (turns out he’s just genuinely awkward and ridiculously uncomfortable in any social situation whatsoever) and before you go off thinking that I’m some kind of high maintenance b*tch, please let me just clarify that despite how I was put off by his awkwardness, I actually ‘dated’ him for about a month and a half before I finally called it quits (we just happened to be complete opposites) and we’re actually still friends.

but at any rate, thank you ~~captain obvious~~ PinkRanger, I’m very well aware that we’re in a recession now, but I gather that my point was not articulated properly. It wasn’t the lack of spending money that bothered me, it was his lack of effort. I don’t ‘require’ a guy to spend money on me for my affection, but I think that at least offering if I’d like to eat before or after the movie, or if I’d like a drink while I watch the movie, is effort. There have been plenty of times that I’ve been out with a guy who’s offered these things, and I actually counter-offered to pay for them. and the whole deal with the gift certificate didn’t bother me, I was just trying to show that he literally didn’t spend a penny that night aside from the gas to get him there and back. and like I stated before, even though I was put-off by his actions, I did give him another chance with the goodbye kiss. (and call me whatever names you like, but being a good kisser is something that I do in fact, ‘require’—unless of course you’re willing to learn and can learn somewhat quickly). and to be honest, up until that “kiss” I was unsure if what we were doing actually even qualified as a date!! He treated me as though he was meeting up with a guy friend to see a movie… I honestly couldn’t tell if he wanted to be there or not!! (which, coincidentally is why I made the move for the kiss b/c it was the only way that I figured I could decide if it was actually a date or not)

so, say what you will, but I really don’t think expecting to be treated in a quasi-romantic fashion is really that demanding. I don’t expect him to open doors for me, ruin a coat by placing it in a puddle, or even paying for everything (but, since he did do the asking, I would have expected him to at least go halfsies), but actually treating me like a date is a must—and </b> that </b> was my point. sorry if it didn’t come across as such.

*sam*
wrote on August 27 2009 @ 06:26 pm: [report]

@luvtara: no, you weren’t rude. I just felt as though I needed to clarify that I don’t demand to be treated like a princess—just like your date rather than your guy friend (which, like I said, is how I felt he treated me). I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love being ‘one of the guys’ but not on a date… and the whole offering to spend money thing was just the way I chose to demonstrate that. but perhaps I should have alluded more to how he acted like a stiff the entire night… you know.. leaning away from me for the entire movie, walking a good distance in front of me, etc etc.

but I totally get what you’re saying about demanding to be treated like a princess. that really is annoying, and FTR, I don’t think I’ve ever expected anything from a date aside from manners, respect, and to at least feign a little interest in me during a date. like _jsw_ said, no one wants to date a mannequin!!

ootie
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 08:27 am: [report]

I totally see what you’re saying, Sam. I’m definitely not a high-maintenance girl, but I do expect some effort to be put into a first date. That doesn’t mean that he has to buy me things and treat me like a princess, but just being considerate and thoughtful goes a long way. Its obvious when a guy isn’t putting much effort in. I don’t mind if a guy doesn’t offer to pick me up, but if he doesn’t offer to pick me up, shows up in scrubby clothes, AND doesn’t offer to pay for anything, that could be a turn-off. Its not a demand for anything, its just preferable if you can tell a guy actually cares about getting to know you and making a good impression. There are other ways to show that that don’t involve money, but it doesn’t really seem like the guy you dated did any of those either!

Also, luvtara, I definitely don’t think it makes you a bitch to expect a guy to remember your birthday, if you’re actually dating.

majicksand
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 09:44 am: [report]

Beyond being rude to the server at the restaurant, I can’t deal with anyone who refuses to tip well for good service. I’m a 20% tipper all day long, so anything less than 15% is just cheap. In my book, if you can’t afford to tip (or don’t want to), go to McDonald’s.

Luckily, I found, and married, a guy who tips better than I do.

ootie
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 10:00 am: [report]

I hate bad tippers. Not just for dates, but even friends. I have a friend who thinks a server has to bend over backwards to receive a decent tip. If the service is average or mediocre, she acts like they were some kind of huge #&@$% and will leave them a few quarters. In my opinion, average service gets them an average tip, which for me is 20%. I don’t think I could ever date and regularly go out to dinner with an embarrassing tipper—or we would have to have an arrangement where I take care of that part.

powplz
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 10:14 am: [report]

I also don’t tolerate poor tipping. I tip 15% if the service annoys me, 20% base, and 25% if I’m impressed/really catered to. I had a roommate in college who said she doesn’t tip because the waitress is the least important part of the restaurant (1. customer 2. food 3. cooks = all the waitress does is relay your order and is subsequently the bottom of the ladder and shouldn’t require a tip). Objecting to American tipping protocol is one thing, choosing to eat out and stiff the wait staff because of it is another.

If you can’t afford to leave a decent tip, you have other options: order take out, go for fast food/places where you don’t have a server, or go to the grocery store.

majicksand
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 10:20 am: [report]

@joyy: Obviously your roommate never waited tables.

bizzle
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 10:42 am: [report]

5. if you take a girl out on a date and you dont insist on paying for everything youre a #&@$% idiot

ootie
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:16 am: [report]

@luvtara: Wanting to see some effort =/= being a demanding princess. A demanding princess would be someone who requires her dates to cater to her every want or need or she feels that they aren’t worth her time. What Sam was talking about wasn’t just money: it was also being inconsiderate.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:23 am: [report]

luvtara, sam wasn’t saying that. Sam was saying that she wants her date to put in an effort. God forbid that when someone asks me out, I expect them to plan a little, maybe look clean, and possibly inquire as to my comfort. Sam also pointed out in her original post that the date got annoyed with her for even suggesting that SHE buy drinks/popcorn, because he didn’t want to risk less-than-perfect seats.

Asking for consideration is not the same as being a princess. Now, if sam were to go around saying that it’s a bad date when he doesn’t buy her a five-star meal and carry her in his arms all the way (walking) to her place, well, then we can talk “princess.”

*sam*
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:26 am: [report]

@ootie & lareinedeslames: THANK YOU!!! I had pretty much given up trying to explain myself. at least I know that someone understood what I was really getting at

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:27 am: [report]

no prob, *sam*. I’ll always stick up for a well-reasoned argument. I’m just that kind of girl.

tk_2009
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:59 am: [report]

Here’s my two cents, being a man who believes in chivalry:

Holding a door open for a woman in not condescending or kowtowing, it’s polite. I hold the door for men too, and not because they look too wimpy to get it themselves or I have something to prove, but because doors can be a pain in the ass for anyone and I already have this one handled. Expecting someone to take care of arrangements for a date they initiated is not princessy, it’s reasonable. It would be princessy to refuse to go through a door until someone opened it for you, it would be princessy to never offer to help cover expenses under any circumstances (offering is the return courtesy for the planning and expected paying on a date you have been asked on). I always offer to pay my share (and expect to follow through) if I am out, be it with parents, friends, or what have you. It’s polite. It acknowledges their effort to make my time enjoyable. I guess what I’m saying is that this is all a two-way street. It’s not unreasonable to expect courtesy, but it is unreasonable not to return it. Chivalry isn’t something men do for women, it is genderless and altruistic.

Men who complain about women expecting them to pay for a date, especially a date they asked the woman on, are missing the point. I am very demanding when it comes to expecting courtesy from others, especially on a date. Offering to take care of everything and meaning it should come from a desire to make sure the other person has the best time possible. Not returning this sentiment is princessy, expecting and returning it is not. Everything is a two-way street. Essentially, princessy behavior is a failure to return courtesy offered genuinely, and both men and women can be guilty as charged.

ootie
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 12:33 pm: [report]

@luvtara: I really don’t think you understand. There is no way I expect the guy to pay for 100% of the stuff we do together. I’m in a relationship and I am usually the one to pay for dinner for both of us because I have more money than he does right now—I imagine if that changes and he has more money, he’ll probably pick up the tab more. I fully believe that a relationship should be equal—when I go on a first date, I put a lot of effort in, and I expect the guy to do the same. It really has very little to do with money.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 12:37 pm: [report]

guys and girls, I think luvtara might just be a troll. That is pretty much the only way I can explain her complete lack of ability to comprehend what’s going on.

Either that or she’s incredibly gullible and her guy friends take advantage of that fact.

*sam*
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 12:46 pm: [report]

@luvtara: OK, let me see if I’m understanding you correctly. Basically what I gather is the only thing I have a right to expect on a date is to not be molested or called dirty names? Because expecting anything above what I expect from a random stranger passing me on the street is being a ‘princess’? I completely agree with what Tony said. It’s a two way street. I may expect to be treated with some extra courtesy (which does, yes, include asking if I’m comfortable—when you have guests at your home, do you not offer them a drink to ensure their comfort? or is waiting to be offered a drink and somewhat expecting it as a normal social script being ‘princessy’ as well?) but I also make sure to reciprocate that same courtesy.

apparently you and I have different expectations. and to be quite frank, I used to be like YOU. I never expected anything from anyone save the common respect reserved for all sentient beings. However, that thought process turned me into a doormat and kept me with guys who treated me like sh*t because I didn’t think I had the right to deserve being treated better since they weren’t physically abusing me. You may not be in that position, and if you aren’t I commend you, but like I said, I’ve been where your thoughts seem to be, and all I can say is that it only serves to remind me that I do in fact have the right to “demand” certain things from my SO—and b/c of that, I’ve been fortunate enough to find someone that treats me the way I feel I deserve to be treated (and FTR, every nice thing he does for me, I reciprocate the gesture, and we do it because we want to, not just because we feel we deserve to be treated so kindly).

tk_2009
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 12:57 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames; I have to agree. It sounds like she used to have a healthy outlook on things and now a few poorly intentioned male friends have convinced her that expecting generosity from her date is akin to condoning the blatantly unfair examples of affirmative action she mentions. Chivalry is not the same as a handout. It is kindness given with none expected. It is kindness for the sake of kindness, and that covers everything from the door to the wallet. And everyone should give and be able to expect it. I’m all for equality, but that doesn’t mean I can’t go out of my way to be kind. I don’t think you’re doing anyone any favors giving them a job they aren’t qualified for, but I think that isn’t the same argument here at all.

tk_2009
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 01:17 pm: [report]

@luvtara: If you are in a serious relationship with someone you deserve the best they have to give, and you have every right to demand it, as they do from you. The person you love, who loves you, should give all the extra they can, because they want to, and for no other reason. I never claimed that chivalry, or karma, has anything to do with unfair advantages of one sex over the other, and I think you are confusing considerate behavior with something else. Expecting someone to do something simply because you don’t want to be put out is one thing, but what I’m talking about is expecting someone to want to treat you like a princess because they want to make you happy, not because they feel pressured to do so by your inconsiderate behavior. And you should return the favor, that’s all.

tk_2009
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 01:18 pm: [report]

@luvtara: I honestly think you have absolutely no idea what I’m saying. I’m not even sure you’re reading MY comments.

*sam*
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 01:29 pm: [report]

@luvtara: No, I think you keep missing my points. I never said I should be OK with physical abuse, but you keep insinuating that by expecting a date to put forth the initiative to make me feel just a little special makes me a “spoiled brat.” All of those things that I originally mentioned would have been fine by themselves, however, they were coupled with each other, and my overall impression was that the guy did not feel the need to put forth any effort whatsoever. and the whole money thing really came up since we were out and I’m pretty sure you can understand how it might be difficult to not spend money on something as simple as drink when you’re out. Like I said, I totally get and understand your point about not expecting a guy to pay for everything or do everything but THAT IS NOT WHAT I WAS HINTING AT. and you seem to have completely missed that. I never once said that I expected him to do everything for me, just that an offer to do something here and there would have been greatly appreciated as I was honestly, effing starving and pretty thirsty (I made it a point not to eat before going since I didn’t know if we were going to eat afterwords).

and if you and your guy friends want to chop up my expectation to be treated with generosity here and there as well and basic respect makes me a spoiled princess, then so be it. But I have it on pretty good authority from my own guy friends that I’m not. and in fact, they’re quite happy that I finally started expecting these things since they were sick of me being with the guys that always ‘took’ when all I ever did was ‘give’. Oh, and FTR, those same guys always seemed to use your arguments as why it was perfectly acceptable for me to always give them a massage, bring them home food, etc while never returning the favor (b/c I should never *expect* them to do anything for me, otherwise, I look like a brat).

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 01:30 pm: [report]

Notice, good people, the response to the suggestion that she is a troll. Actually a very clear, and very obvious “troll” response: “I’m not a troll! You are! Nya!”

tony, your input has been sterling, by the way. I revise the initial poor impression I had of you on the ‘terrible girlfriends’ comment thread.

luvtara, I find it funny that you think I’m being a *** to you because I pointed out that you’ve had the viewpoint explained to you by three or four different people and STILL don’t get it. No one is asking for special priveleges here. I am as wary of affirmative action as a white male (moreso, in fact, because I don’t want a hand-out. If I get a job, I want to know it’s because I’m the most qualified candidate. Period). The only reason I can think of for your obtuseness is that you’re trolling, or you are a very gullible person who has been misinformed by her “guy friends.”

Chivalry isn’t dead—it’s mortally wounded by people who misunderstand it.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 01:37 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: She is a meta-troll with logic like that.

tk_2009
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 01:53 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames et al: It’s like she read my comment, rephrased it in a slightly nonsensical way, peppered it with some things I didn’t even hint at and then tried to make it seem as though she somehow made the point I did and I am somehow now in favor of stalkers. It’s all very confusing, and not at all hard to see how her disingenuous male friends confused her ideas of what kindness and reasonable expectations within a relationship are.

@luvtara: read my comments again. SLOWLY. Compare them to yours. Think about it for a moment. You are steadily proving that you ARE as naive as I never claimed you are.

betty123
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 01:53 pm: [report]

Bottom line, the article is about getting a second date. The only way to do that is to impress the person on the first date. Which means being on one’s best behavior and treating your date like, yes, a princess. The person is supposed to win you over. Would you not be on your best behavior and try to impress on the first date? That being said, if someone acts like they did toward sam on her date she described and that is their BEST behavior, there is nowhere to go but down, major red flag, and therefore, no second date. That is my criteria at least.

majicksand
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:22 pm: [report]

@luvtara: By your word choices and your logic, I’m going to guess that you are very young. If I may offer a suggestion? Pay attention to the well-written, well thought-out comments here. There is real wisdom to be had if you’re looking.

There is a definite difference between “bratty” and self-respecting. As a former “diva bitch” myself, I know what you are trying to say. Unfortunately, I think you’ve been led astray by some friends who believe you should do a complete 180. There is a balance.

I’m quite thankful that I’ve found my personal equilibrium well enough to enjoy being pampered by a man without taking advantage OR feeling guilty.

Calm down and take this opportunity to learn from people who have been doing this a lot longer than you.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:23 pm: [report]

....Really? luvtara, you are hilarious. You really are. Apparently, you haven’t read up on your internet slang, if you don’t know what a “troll” is on forums like this. haha.

So basically, what luvtara over here is saying, is that women whose dinners are paid for are prostitutes looking for Johns. And men have every right to expect that if they pay for dinner, they’re getting laid.

You know, there is more than one way to reciprocate someone’s attention. If someone takes me out on a date, and pays for me, I will probably offer to take him on a date, and pay for him (assuming that the date went well). I spent a good bit of time in France, where generally speaking, the person who does the inviting is ALWAYS the person who pays, whether it’s a date, two friends, two family members, whatever. If you ask the other person, you are agreeing to pay.

I just think it’s fantastic that luvtara thinks that the only way a woman can pay back a guy for the “kindness” of paying for a date is to have sex with him. Poor thing. Poor misguided thing.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:25 pm: [report]

PS: we really DO need a forum on here. Anyone? Didn’t jsw offer to help set one up? Someone needs to follow up on this!

powplz
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:28 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames - agreed.

tk_2009
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:28 pm: [report]

@luvtara: Let’s take this slowly, because I’m not really sure what you are saying here.

1) Chivalry is kindness for the sake of kindness. I said that earlier. It is being nice with out any express expectations for anything in return. Everyone has a right to this, and to expect it, especially on a first date. This can include paying, but certainly covers a far wider spread of things, like holding the door open, offering to drive, you name it really, anything POLITE.

2) NO ONE IS IMPLYING THAT CHIVALRY SHOULD BE MET WITH A SEXUAL RETURN. Because that is no longer chivalry.

3) I am not using kindness as a euphemism for anything else. I mean genuine, human kindness, like holding the door open for you, like not groping you randomly, like offering to drive you to the movie, like offering to pay for the date you were asked on. My god, from the stories you tell it’s no wonder you have no idea what this means. No decent man should buy you dinner and expect his dividend to be sex. No decent man should just reach over and cop a feel. None of that has anything to do with chivalry.

At this point it is hard to tell if you are just that confused, or if you are simply trying to make everyone here crazy. I like a good debate as much as anyone, but it’s hard to debate something that makes little to no sense.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:32 pm: [report]

Thanks for boiling down her ramblings, my head actually goes all fuzzy when I read through 1/3 of each of her posts.

tk_2009
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:35 pm: [report]

@Cheese: Gads, I know. It’s kind of astonishing. I don’t think I could write like that if I tried.

powplz
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:36 pm: [report]

@cheese - I’m surprised anyone’s reading ANY of it

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:36 pm: [report]

tony, thing is, she’s not suggesting that such was YOUR argument. She’s saying that that’s HER argument. Poor thing has been brainwashed into thinking that the only way a woman can be kind is to offer up her body. The only way, in fact, that a woman can repay ANY favor done for her by a man is to have sex with him. So a guy fixed your car and gave you a discount? Better be ready to drop trou for him. or maybe mechanics just get bjs? Since there’s no long-term commitment implied?

tk_2009
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:45 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: trying to figure out what she is really saying is like trying to solve a greasy Rubik’s cube after having laser surgery on your eyes and both thumbs removed.

brandyalexander
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:46 pm: [report]

“Because really you are saying that you only have sex with people you care about. And so the way a girl cares is to give sex to a guy. And the way a guy cares is to give money to a girl.”
Wow. I am so, so glad this isn’t true.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:48 pm: [report]

myfavoritealcoholicbeverage: Isn’t it great that we don’t live in a monochromatic world of misogyny?

brandyalexander
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:52 pm: [report]

Yes, thank goodness

Alison Wonderland
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 02:59 pm: [report]

So um, might I play off all of this ridiculousness for one second to ask a question? Cheese help me out here:

I have a long distance guy friend (a beau if you will) who I went to visit recently. He rows, and he had a race coming up and I wanted to see him compete so I asked if I could come. He was thrilled that I had offered, but it meant that I would be driving a good 4 hours to see him. With Hurricane Bill and 12 foot ocean waves, the race was cancelled but I was already there so he asked if I wanted to go to dinner. It wasn’t too fancy (beach fare)and I didn’t order anything too pricey, no drinks. But I didn’t offer to pay at all, not even the tip. I thought about it, but the check came, he took care of it without much ado and I didn’t say anything. And now after this week of posts I wonder if I should have?! (But I justify it by having driven the entire length of the state of NJ to see him… so.)

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:01 pm: [report]

@Alison: I think you’re safe. The meal sounded cheap, and you went out of your way to be there. Safe! *baseball umpire motion*

tk_2009
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:06 pm: [report]

@alison: Agreed, you’re good. I think the bigger picture is it’s all give and take, he shouldn’t expect you to pay for something he invited you to, not any more than he should expect you to drive 4 hours to see his match. It’s all about being realistic and recognizing genuine kindness when you see it.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:09 pm: [report]

luvtara: so calling people low-class trash isn’t name-calling? How are you taking the high road, exactly?

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:13 pm: [report]

lmao, luvtara… Cheeeese was joking.

If you couldn’t figure that one out… you need a lot more help than any of us can give you.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:17 pm: [report]

oh, my dear luvtara, do not be so cruel! I am not the one, after all, that suggested that women whose meals are paid for are prostitutes. I called you a troll because that is what you are acting like—a troll, in this case, being an individual who is trying to get attention from anyone and everyone by putting controversial and flaming posts up.

and if you were really taking the “high road,” my dearest darling, you wouldn’t be responding to my overtures at all. And I would languish in despair of ever achieving your great affections. Perhaps if I was a man, offering to purchase you dinner, you would be kinder to me?

majicksand
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:29 pm: [report]

Not that I am in need of validation here, but did anyone notice that luvtara chose to completely ignore my comment that was intended to be kind and helpful?

brandyalexander
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:30 pm: [report]

Oh, dear god. Here’s the thing: its not unkind to use certain measures to decide whether or not one will see someone again.

Secondly, yes, it is a kind gesture for a guy to offer to pay all or part of the date. I like it. It shows he wants to impress me and he likes me enough to treat me to a night out. And, please back me up on this, men: its my impression that a guy has to like a girl at least enough to drop thirty bucks on a dinner with her and enjoy her company even if it doesn’t result with her getting naked at the end of the night.

Similarly, it is a kind gesture for the girl to either pay, or offer to pay, part or all of the cost of dinner. If he insists on paying, graciously say, “thank you,” and mean it. Not everything is a business transaction, sometimes, a person really gets a kick out of being generous for generosity’s sake. Reciprocating kindness is all very good, but I think its also important to show you can accept kindness with grace, and not regard it as part of a transaction.

tk_2009
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:33 pm: [report]

@luvtara: I may be out of patience after this one.

1) Let’s be clear: you’re being as base and insulting as anyone. Done.

2) Your definition of kindness is flawed and limited. Kindness includes anything you do for someone else, like holding a door open, paying for dinner, driving them around, listening when they talk, buying them a drink, respecting their feelings, you name it. Kindness = being nice, and being nice is doing something someone will appreciate when you don’t have to do it. It is not unreasonable to expect this from someone you will potentially spend a lot of time with, be it romantically or otherwise. This is not being demanding, this is wanting to be treated well, as you should. It only becomes demanding in a bad way when you are not showing kindness in return.

3) That list is about respect for others and yourself, respecting them enough to look presentable, respecting them enough to be polite, respecting them enough to acknowledge their humanity, respecting your waiter/waitress enough to be polite. These things are a litmus test for human kindness and respect.

4) You date someone to judge if they will be a suitable match for you. No one can NOT judge others, it’s human nature and often necessary. You confuse the word “judge” with “condemn.” You can’t form an opinion without judgment, that is simple fact. The idea that judging someone on their behavior is somehow wrong is NAIVE. That is the point of a date.

5) Your profile indicates that you are 1 year younger than my youngest brother. It may as well be 20. I try not to insult people because it lowers the credibility of what I say, but you are a naive fool. If my brother walked through the door with you on his arm I would be ashamed of him. You have a lot of growing up to do, but if you want to continue writing in these forums, I suggest you begin with grammar 101.

workerbee
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:35 pm: [report]

Ok, I haven’t finished reading through all the comments, but @*sam*: that is not how a card carrying member of the LLSA acts! We do not defend our desire, nay need to be treated like the queens we are. I can only hope that your defense of your attitude is merely a ploy to start a debate. Otherwise I may have to remove you from the panel of judges at the “gun” competition.

brandyalexander
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:40 pm: [report]

Tony: Very well put. I was starting to get to what you imply in your fourth point. A date is like an interview for a relationship. It may be unpleasant to know that someone didn’t find you sexy enough, polite enough, whatever enough, but it doesn’t imply that that person was unkind (and Luvtara, it is “unkind,” not “not kind,” which I think you ought to have realized after making this mistake, let’s see, nine times in your post, all in capital LETTERS).

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:47 pm: [report]

@workerbee: It’s clearly a ploy, although it took me a while to realize that because her comments left me so intensely aroused that I needed to spend some time… alone. See, what she’s doing is making herself seem reasonable and approachable and just entitled enough to seem harder to get. It’s brilliant. The only real flaw in her approach is that she also comes across as intelligent, which works for me but which comes across as being too much work for many men.

pragmatryst
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 03:54 pm: [report]

@luvtara: “If he is talking to me and being respectful and not creeping me out by trying to grab my junk (ick! Had this happen waayyyy too often!!!)”

Ick is right. Add another injustice to the list…

11. Re-enacting the dramatic “Crying Game” revelation scene with an unsuspecting partner even after he chivalrously paid for dinner and drinks: NOT KIND

pinkjellyfish
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 04:20 pm: [report]

It would hardly be a good idea to take dating advice seriously from a 20-year-old. You’re hardly an expert on the subject at that age, but it is the best time to start learning from both experience and heeding sage advice from others who have been adults longer than you! luvtara should be learning a thing or two from everyone here, not fighting back.

Alison Wonderland
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 04:30 pm: [report]

Alright Amelia… it’s about that time.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 04:36 pm: [report]

agreed, Alison. Getting back on topic: Any other controversial items in that list for anyone?

powplz
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 04:42 pm: [report]

@majicksand - Yeah, I noticed that too.

@luvtara - You can defend yourself (and the points you make) without calling others names.

Also, sometimes picking up the check (or going back and forth on who pays, which a lot of people do) is just about being nice to and taking care of the people you care about. Do you feel the need to directly compensate your parents or friends if they take you out or invite you over for dinner?

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 05:05 pm: [report]

anyone else think luvtara might actually be a bitter male? Just a thought.

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 05:11 pm: [report]

@luvtara: I was going to hand you a shovel and/or some rope, but it seems you have plenty of each. I strongly recommend that you walk away, relax in some way, and come back later. However, should you decide not to, I suppose I’m curious as to how you’ll insult me. But, seriously, this isn’t worth getting this upset over. It’s just a column on a weblog.

writergirl
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 05:14 pm: [report]

Dang…I’ve been missing all the good discussions this week….

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 05:15 pm: [report]

Jump in, writergirl! The water’s fine.

writergirl
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 05:19 pm: [report]

@lareindeslames—I’m too damn tired to go through and read everything. Maybe next week!

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 05:26 pm: [report]

@luvtara: You never fail to entertain. I must admit that even <i>I<i> didn’t remotely grasp at the straws needed to reach the conclusions you so adeptly arrived at so quickly. I do apologize for so blatantly suggesting that I was going to tie you up, rape you, and then bury you. I hope the site can forgive me and not ban me by accepting the obviously fabricated excuse that I simply mean a shovel with which you could dig yourself in deeper or more rope with which to hang yourself. Of course, even those allusions are violent. I guess I’ll just walk away and go back to kicking puppies.

tk_2009
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 05:26 pm: [report]

@luvtara:
“@lareinedeslames: I’m not like you calling people names. If you want to act with no class and call me names that’s up to you. But I’m not here to get into some petty catfight with you. Please grow up. *sigh* “

next comment:

“@lareinedeslames: well since you’re the one acting like a low class piece of trash, I’m pretty sure you’re the one that needs the help. But thanks for the offer! =) “

By your own “reasoning” that makes you a hypocrite and petty as well.

My third point did not mention paying for anything. Thus your third point is invalid.

It isn’t about giving with the expectation of a return. It is about giving to be kind.

You are correct, age does not directly correlate with intelligence once physical development in complete. However, you have yet to demonstrate said intelligence unless your vacuous misappropriation of the English language is meant to be some sort of foil for the elegant points you intend to make and this is all some sort of grand irony only you are privy to.

See, here’s the real irony, myself, along with others, have been trying to tell you that you can go out on a date with someone and they can be kind to you and not expect anything in return beyond your literal appreciation and that is okay and normal. Dating doesn’t have to be some score sheet or goods exchange, it can be two people enjoying their company without expectation of anything more than that. We, at first, were trying to agree with some of your points, until you stopped making sense that is.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 06:51 pm: [report]

Actually when I said the mean sounded “cheap”, I meant that because it was stated “beach fare” as well as no drinks were ordered it would of been affordable. And she obviously cared about the guy to drive all the way though New Jersey, I’d say that deserves a meal. Jeez you are either a certifiable moron, or you see the world in a completely different way than everyone else.

*sam*
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 07:02 pm: [report]

wow, who knew I could start such a “debate”!?!?! let’s see in one thread I have:

*been called a princess

*been accused of being a whore if I slept with a guy after he paid for, well anything that evening

*apparently somehow defended violence against women(seriously luvtara??)

*been accused of being a “spoiled brat” for demanding a certain amount of kindness and respect that goes beyond that reserved in general for sentient beings on a date or in a relationship at all

*had other people stick up for me against these accusations

*been threatened to have my LLS membership revoked (please guys, no, it really was just a ploy, HONEST!!)

*and caused _jsw_ to need time “alone”

well, my work here is done

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 07:05 pm: [report]

@sam: Quite epic if I do say so myself.

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 07:06 pm: [report]

Damn it *sam*, I have work to do, and here you are posting again.

I’ll be in my bunk. Again.

*sam*
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 07:10 pm: [report]

@CheeeeEEEEse: thanks—I’ll be sure to fit this into my resume somehow

@_jsw_: aww, sorry!!! I just got back from “work” (I use this term loosely for what I actually do, lol) and had to say something since I missed so much while I was away!!!

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 07:26 pm: [report]

@*sam*: It’s OK. I’m not too sore. Yet. Back to work….

powplz
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 09:23 pm: [report]

lol, this is hilarious. but that’s why I read the Frisky, for entertainment. <3!

workerbee
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 10:27 pm: [report]

@sam: seeing as to how you have sparked such a rousing debate and that luvtara seems to wholeheartedly think you’re a LLS, you’re membership is not in any danger of being revoked. Good job here!

@luvtara: my favorite part of your comments so far is how you stated, in a public forum, that you sleep with your bf because he pays for you. You didn’t even make it sound as though it’s any good, just merely an exchange of services. I mean, with sami we all know her man keeps her coming back for more but for you it’s how you repay him for spending money on you. Check and check. If you weren’t so against our ideals I’d think you’d be a good candidate for LLSA membership. While I know you will still find plenty of ways to read crazy insults and possibly threats (really, tied up, raped and buried? Really??) here’s the quote from what you wrote earlier:
“I’m not so naive to think that my simple “thank you” is worth his paying for my dinner… So I sleep with him in return…”
As you stated, since your bf paid, your simple appreciation of his kind gesture is not enough and thusly you must provide sex in order to remain on equal footing.

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 10:33 pm: [report]

@workerbee: You also might have mentioned that, since she considers sleeping with him to be a means to show him that she cares and as payment for the dinner, that leads one to conclude not only that sex is the primary way she can show him she cares but also that she considers him to be such an ineffectual lover that the sex acts as a payment from her to him but not vice versa.

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 10:38 pm: [report]

@luvtara: I’m torn between two theories: (1) your account has been hijacked and someone is trying to make you look bad, or (2) you’re having some sort of breakdown. I’d normally mock comments like this, but if it’s #1 it’d be pointless because it’s not actually “you”, and if it’s #2, it’d be cruel because you’re ill. If that’s the case, I hope you find the help you need. You’re not coming across as balanced, and I’m genuinely (yes, actually) concerned.

Anyway, just to make this comment have some value, I’m going to see if something works so I can add to my collection of things-that-work-in-comments:

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 10:41 pm: [report]

Oh luvtara, I could rhapsodize to your many shining qualities all night, I pine for you, I ache for to read your every lyrical line of complete fiction. I adore you. I’ll buy you dinner and you don’t even have to “repay” me.

Frankly… if you have nothing to offer your man in “repayment” for his kindness other than sex, I really wonder that you have a boyfriend at all. I mean, you might as well just set yourself up as an escort and have done. That’s pretty much what you’re doing anyway.

jsw, luvtara might not want to be tied up, raped and buried, but you make it sound so appealing! Or maybe luvtara does. I’m not sure anymore. Consider me a candidate!

workerbee, can I be considered for membership? What do I have to do to qualify? Is expecting for my date (who asked me, not vice versa) to pay for my food enough, or will I have to start asking men out and THEN making them pay for dinner? I want to make sure I get this right.

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 10:41 pm: [report]

Well, at least something came of that comment, in that I learned that the tag didn’t work.

Seriously, though, luvtara... if this is actually you, I hope you get some help.

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 10:45 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: I can’t do the raping and burying thing, but I’ve always wanted to try the tying up thing, so come on down to the paintball and greasing-up and we can give it a shot. If you can be lazy, if you can leech off men, and if you can at least act slutty (if we use luvtara‘s rules, everyone can), then you’re a member, as far as I can tell.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 10:48 pm: [report]

haha. jsw, I’ve already done the tying up thing. It’s quite fun! I’d love to help judge-under-direction the paintball and greasing-up. According to luvtara I’ve been leeching off men for years, and I’m plenty lazy. I think luvtara has me beat on the acting slutty part, though.

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:05 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: I look forward to you showing me the ropes.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:06 pm: [report]

@jsw: are you more into natural fibers, or synthetics?

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:09 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: I honestly do knot know.

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:15 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: However, even if I wind up unable to get out, I’d expect that you, as the Queen of Blades, could cut me loose. Well, assuming those blades aren’t used in some sort of threatening manner.

@luvtara: Sooner or later, even you will think that the horse has been tenderized enough.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:19 pm: [report]

jsw, I hope you’re not just stringing me along! If at first you don’t succeed, tie, tie again. Also, I’m glad you decoded my name! Either you know a little french, or you can use a translator.

jfst
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:21 pm: [report]

Regarding luvtara:

It HAS to be a guy or a guy on her account. No one could possibly that “out there” and make so many asinine statements without planning it out first.

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:27 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: I speak a little French. Not much, but enough in this case. I decoded your name a while ago, but this seemed like an appropriate time to mention it. And I do enjoy someone who likes - and is good at - being punny.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:30 pm: [report]

jsw, someday, I will have to tell you the lengthy history of my name. But today is not that day. I do, however, love a good pun. Your first one almost made me snort green tea, but I am willing to forgive you that for the timing.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:34 pm: [report]

@luvtara: Ok, here is the thing, at the moment I am immensely wasted. Lets say hypothetically we are boyfriend and girlfriend. I buy(meaning, I paid for the whole thing) the meal. Lets also assume you believe your theories to be correct. I’m making my move outside your door, I kiss you passionately against your door (I am a guy, and you haven’t said no yet), so I proceed. I push you around the opened door and slide you you till you are pinned against the wall and venerable. I then reach down and pull down your underwear, pull is and understatement, I rip it off leaving shards of cloth on chaffed skin. I then jam my index and middle fingers sans lubrication straight up your vagina. When I get bored, and I would invariably, I would begin to use my penis, it is oh so good. The pain you illicit only fuels my conquest. I pump harder. And harder. Till I leave my seed deep within something I neither covet nor care for or wish to ever see again.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:37 pm: [report]

You do see, luvtara, it’s really not important what is said, because I can say some pretty heinous things…so what is the point.

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:38 pm: [report]

@CheeeeEEEEse: Some aspirin and lots of water before bed, K?

@lareinedeslames:Sorry about the green tea. Please let me know ahead of time when you’re about to sip, and I’ll wait to comment until you’ve swallowed. I look forward to hearing your story some day.

workerbee
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:38 pm: [report]

@luvtara: as a proud member of LLSA I have no problem with you calling me a whore. Jealous girls always resort to such tactics. Though I must say, where you got that I always return sexual favors for men paying for my meals (besides my mentioning my LLSA membership) is beyond me. I’ll have you know though I only save the good sex for the high rollers.

@lareinedeslames: your expectation that a man will pay when he asks you out is a good start. I think it is best to always expect them to pay though—but always keep them guessing as to when they will get their “repayment”! We must also always be manipulating and constantly figuring out how to take advantage from men. If they think they will always get “repaid” after each outing then they will become complacent. Oh, and don’t forget to always expect to be waited on hand and foot and to scream and b*tch at any man who refuses to treat you like a princess. You are well on your way to becoming an excellent LLS. Welcome to the group!

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:50 pm: [report]

nota bene, everyone:

-luvtara is dyslexic: she keeps calling jsw “jws.”

-“you’ll stalk stalking me…” stalk stalking? *headtilt*

...I could really make a song out of that. Get Timbaland to do the remix. I’ll be a rockstar in next to no time!

“I was stalk-stalking my man, I was kicking that can…”

With the right beat, it’d work.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:53 pm: [report]

@luvtara: Yeah I’d totally do immensely sick things to you. Thanks for the visual by the way, the picture helps greatly. I’d bend you over a water cooler and push that yellow top up over your chest while pulling down those tight jeans….the pleasure is immense. Let it wash over you. Touch your clitoris and enjoy the situation…

_jsw_
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:53 pm: [report]

@workerbee: I happily would like to ask you out now, and, since it’s been clearly established that I can expect nothing in return, I can relax and not have to worry about how to make my move when the evening is over. If you ask me in for a drink, I’ll assume that I’ll need to have the drinks on me or at least pay you in advance for them. Much simpler.

@luvtara: If I’m reading you correctly (and I’ve taken several mind-altering substances just to help me to do so), then your skin will stop crawling once I start stalking you (“stalk stalking”, in your parlance). Who knew you’d be so attracted to my tiny limp penis?

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:56 pm: [report]

@CheeeeEEEEse: okay… now you’re kinda freaking ME out. I’m glad I’m not a troll.

jsw: of course she’s attracted to it. If you can’t get it up, she doesn’t have to “repay” you!

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 28 2009 @ 11:57 pm: [report]

@jsw: So you can hook me up with good stuff then, right?

workerbee
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:02 am: [report]

@luvtara: it would be backstabbing if we were ever on friendly terms which is not the case. This would be more of the “not until you can see the whites of their eyes” kind of stabbing. You quite entertain me.

@lareinedeslames: I think you could find a few more jewels from some of the other comments luvtara made to add to your platinum selling song.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:02 am: [report]

@lareinedeslames: First, well done on the lyrics. I can’t wait to hear the remix. Second, you fail to see the dilemma luvtara will face due to my tiny limp penis. Since she cannot repay me, she’ll forever be in my debt. It’s all part of my insidious plan.

@CheeeeEEEEse: Drive down with me to the grease-fest and I’ll hook you up with anything you want.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:07 am: [report]

@jsw: Where is this ‘grease fest’ as I am quite intrigued?

workerbee
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:12 am: [report]

@jsw: when I ask you in for drinks you must then suggest stopping by the nearest liquor store so I can pick out a very expensive bottle of wine. Also, I reserve the right to b*tch at you for not taking any initiative once upstairs since that would mean you want me to be incredibly unladylike by having to jump you, or conversely, b*tch at you for trying to get me drunk so you could take advantage of my malleable state. Though while you should never expect me to repay you for a night out, I’m sure you would be handsomely “rewarded” before the night is through.

workerbee
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:17 am: [report]

Btw I love how sami’s competition for men to win her favor has turned into a grease fest. That and the usage of big words in this thread.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:18 am: [report]

Haha, luvtara, so in three years you’ll be an old hag? Well, if your “boyfriend” stays around that long, he’ll be gone in three years. Sorry, dollface. Those guys are terrible, aren’t they?

and now I know how luvtara stays that weight in her picture, CheeeeEEEEse (”*barf*”)! Perhaps you could help her with that.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:19 am: [report]

workerbee, I will throw out the dollar words every chance you give me. polyphiloprogenitive. Prestidigitation. Hegemony.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:21 am: [report]

@luvtara: I hope he f|_|cks some sense into you after that movie, because it would be only natural in the sense that he allowed it.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:30 am: [report]

“He bought me a fine meal so I’ll f*ck him - that’s the deal.
I’ll show him that I care - to pay him; it’s my fare.
He took me out to eat now I’ll go down on his meat.
And as he’s getting laid I’ll just know that I’ve repaid
his gentlemanly gestures with this sexual charade.”

“But what’s this st-stalk-stalker?
I’ve gained another gawker.
He wonders ‘does she mean this’ and he has a tiny penis.
He has a shovel and a rope and I’m fearing
I’ll be buried without hope. Doom is nearing.
But in the end I know he’s limp and an elderly dumb wimp
so I know he’ll never get me, that ugly flaccid gimp.”

“And now this bitches and these ho’s
Are having issues with my prose.
All I know is those dumb slut hags
Can’t get f*cked without brown bags
Over their stupid wrinkly heads
On their entitled princess beds.”

And so on….

workerbee
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:31 am: [report]

@lareinedeslames: You either don’t know how I feel about big words or do and are using them to get me going. Either way, I like it!

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:40 am: [report]

Sorry, I meant to say “these bitches and these ho’s”. I tend to mess up my writing when the muse is speaking to me. And by “the muse”, of course I mean luvtara. I think I’ll change my member name to luvluvtara.

@workerbee: I have no problem with choosing the wine. It will provide me with some interesting insight into your taste. And I’ll have no problem taking the initiative… up to a point (the point where I’d have a much greater insight into your… taste). I’d much rather leave you satisfied but begging for more than overstep my bounds on the first date. There will be others, of course. And obviously I’ll leave handsomely rewarded - is your presence alone not a gift?

@CheeeeEEEEse: Read the mile-long thread. It discusses the grease-fest in depth.

*sam*
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 05:35 am: [report]

OK, I *really* need to get ready for work, but I just read what all I missed while my sad, lonely, old hag self was talking to my bf (who doesn’t expect me to ‘pay him back’ sexually for paying for anything. which is AWESOME considering his salary pays the rent and mine only pays for the ‘fun’—before you say anything luvtara it’s because he makes more than I do, so I advise you STFU for a second) and actually sleeping.

but I just really needed to say: WOW. WTF?!?! she’s insane, that’s all there is to it. I work in the mental health field, and am genuinely exasperated by her. like, she seriously reminds me of a schizophrenic—they make NO f*cking sense but it’s completely useless to argue ANY point with them b/c they will find the most *ridiculous* counter-argument!! and like _jsw_ I’m seriously concerned—she’s only 2yrs younger than me (that’s right ~~moron~~ luvtara I’m only 22, and already have more self-respect than you do, as well as a man that respects me enough to NOT require sex as payments) which means that unlike all of you other ‘old fogies’ I’m going to have to live in a world with her in it for longer than you!!! and there are undoubtedly others out there like her. and she is a PERFECT example of our failing public schools if they let her graduate!!! I honestly believe philosophy should be a requirement now because of her!

I have more to say but I *seriously* need to go—I have to pick a couple clients up.. I’ll be back later.

oh, and luvtara I’m seriously curious how this ‘payment’ system works for you guys. Like, if he takes you out to McDonalds, does he only get a blow job, or is it just crappier sex?? But if he were to take you out to a nice place, does he get to do something kinky? (or is kinky sex only something a whore like me and my “creeper” bf would be into???) you honestly have me intrigued on how this whole thing works.

oh and CheeeeEEEEse WOW, that was a little much my friend, a little much. but I will at least chop it up to you being wasted…

secretsquirrel
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 09:00 am: [report]

The point of the post is that there are certain parameters that people use to judge someone worthy of a second date. I don’t think any of these are “demands,” so much as expectations for gentlemanly behavior on a FIRST DATE. Demands would be sending that list to him and telling him if he doesn’t meet them all, then the date is off. Expecting them in your heart and if he fails, choosing to not meet him again is just a personal judgment call that the date was not a good one.

Me personally, I’m a twitter fiend and if someone tweeted and later I saw “Had a great first date, this girl ROCKS,” I think I’d laugh and call the guy for a second date.

Common courtesy should be demanded by everyone because it is an indicator of respect.

Some people on here have become totally unhinged because demanding common courtesy seems to be a bad thing in his or her eyes and I feel sorry for those that consider it a normal thing to be treated in a crappy manner and to be expected to put out because a man asked her to dinner and then had the unmitigated gall to pay for it out of gentlemanly behavior. Shame on his mother for teaching him manners.

Whatever.

tk_2009
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 09:42 am: [report]

Here’s my theory: I think luvtara is a 13 year old foreign (pick your favorite nationality) girl, and is running all of this through google translator services. I can’t possibly understand how else she could be a real person whose first language is English.

aiyeeee *head explodes*

FTR: I’m 26 years old (grandpa) and happily married to a woman headed for a PhD is cognitive neuroscience who is published in Nature magazine. Clearly, she’s mentally unstable to be with such a misogynistic douche as myself. I like to call her my meal ticket (she just laughs and slaps my ass).

powplz
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 09:59 am: [report]

@tony - no need to set the record straight, I think luvtara was the only one under the impression that you were a geriatric douchebag. and my theory is that luvtara is a 13 year old boy just dreaming of the day girls on the internet agree that if a guy buys a girl dinner, he is entitled to sex.

@jsw - luvluvtara. thank for teh lolz.

Alison Wonderland
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 10:25 am: [report]

Cheeese: It was this nice little bar/resturant in Cape May. In addition to sea-food they had some banging brick oven pizzas. But I do live for really authentic beach-fare. Boardwalk cheese-steaks or sausage & peppers, and funnel cake and Kohr’s brothers for dessert? Now THATS a date! (But of course you can’t eat cheese-steak or sausage and peppers if you plan on spending the night…)
‘GreaseFest’ sounds like mecca, were it an actual place and involved food.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 10:52 am: [report]

Wow, you guys were busy after I left last night. I went out to dinner. Just with friends, so no sexual favors necessary. I did get a facial and a pedicure from my friend while watching a movie at her place though, so my status as an LLS should be secure.

I’m really excited that I finally joined the ranks of decrepit, condescending loser while I was away. I was starting to feel left out. :( Though I feel better now since I’m the only one that got accused of acting like someone’s mom. I feel so special.

Just to make sure I maintain on that level: Cheese, honey, lay off the sauce. It’s really not good for you obviously.

Also, I think I may have figured out why no one seemed able to make any headway last night. We were speaking the wrong language. Anyone remember the Grandma from the movie Airplane? (there I go showing my age again) The one who helped the stewardess translate because she could speak jive? I’m thinking if luvtara comes back we should all endeavor to communicate in some combination of hood-rat and valley girl. We might, y’know, like OMG score some street cred or something cause like we’re like totally failsauce ATM.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 11:46 am: [report]

@sam: I was serious, as well as wasted. I do actually hope some sense was #&@$% into her.

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:04 pm: [report]

@ Luvtara:

1. Your words, verbatim: “Ok so by that reasoning, if paying and holding doors and everything else a guy does is the same as “kindness” then you are being a total hypocrite for saying a guy is wrong if he demands sex in return.”

Suddenly, I get it. I am being a hypocrite when I don’t have sex with guys who treat me nicely. I need to call all my male friends who ever bought me a beer or a coffee out of friendship, or gave me a ride when my car was in the shop, or a hug when I was feeling down, and get on my knees and blow them! They are probably sitting around waiting for this. There is no way a guy would lend me a hand just to be nice.

Come to think about it, this is great news, because there are lots of people I’ve been nice to, who now owe me sex in return. Some of them are even hot! If they say no, I’ll just tell them to stop being not kind. I’d better stock up on lube, or I’ll be sore by Monday!

Please tell me you understand there are other ways of making people feel wanted and respected besides f*cking them.

2. It is a good idea for you to learn how to write, and to do this soon. If this is how poorly you write, I would hate to hear how you speak. As Gandhi’s teacher said, “If you cannot say what you mean, then how will you mean what you say?”

@Tony: We know. No one here, except for the crazy one, thinks you are a Grandpa. Though I like learning about the other posters and what interesting lives they have God damn, we rock.

@majicksand: Facial. Ha ha. I think you are on the wrong post

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:12 pm: [report]

@brandyalexander: I just wanted to mention that, not only have I provided supportive comments to you, you have done the same for me. It would stand to reason that we need to meet for sex to relieve our mutual obligation. However, similar to the use of carbon credits, I’d also be happy to work out some arrangement so others can take on our debts. Your call. In the meantime, we should studiously avoid any niceties unless we’re willing to add them to the tab.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:16 pm: [report]

Oh dear, does this mean that I owe sex, too? But then, sex is also owed me… hmmm. This could be a good arrangement.

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:19 pm: [report]

@ Cheese: Woah. WTF?

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:22 pm: [report]

Ha ha, JSW, and Lareinedeslames, I guess we are all due for some naked time. Maybe Luvtara can help us understand precisely which sex acts are appropriate payments for internet kindnesses?

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:24 pm: [report]

@brandy: Haha! Good call.

Cucumber mask—totally slimy. My friend had never done one before, so she gooped it on. It took better than two hours to dry. I let her color my hair too. Yeah… I really love her, but I’ll be getting another box of color when I get off work to even it out. My hair falls to my waist, so you can imagine how much I’m loving this right now. I am soooo thankful I did not take her up on her offer to cut it! My husband would never have forgiven either of us. In good news, the pedicure looks great.

She is my friend, so I think I’m gonna have to bite the bullet and keep doing these “girlie nights”. She needs the practice.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:28 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: It really does seem to be win-win.

@brandyalexander: Since the niceties were electronic, it would seem that the payment would have to be e-sex of some sort. With luck, someone will soon blog about methods for that. Of course, then we’d be in their debt as well. Which, again, is a win-win.

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:29 pm: [report]

@ majicksand: Give her time… in a few years you will have an excellent stylist who will pamper you for free and make all your friends jealous

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:29 pm: [report]

@majicksand: You know, those cucumber peel-off masks are only supposed to be applied in a thin layer… not like a regular mask. haha.

You could suggest to your friend that you make your own masks at home—like an oatmeal mask? Those are fun.

@brandy: I agree. perhaps we could conference call luvtara’s johnImeanboyfriend, too since he seems to have a system in place?

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:30 pm: [report]

Yay! E-SEX! I hope I don’t get a virus…
Oh, Luvtara troll, please come back. I like you!

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:31 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: I suspect he might also be an expert in brainwashing… that is, if he exists at all.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:34 pm: [report]

Maybe luvtara’s boyfriend is luvtara. Like, he hijacked her account. That would account for the trolliness.

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:36 pm: [report]

Peut-etre. Oh, please come back, crazy!

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:36 pm: [report]

@brandyalexander: Remember that article ‘24 types of sex’...#25 Sense #&@$%.

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:37 pm: [report]

Oh yay, she’s back!

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:37 pm: [report]

You ask and you shall receive.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:41 pm: [report]

oh, luvtara! I am so glad you’re back, my love. I was beginning to miss your great wisdom and awful grammatical skills, and of course your twisted logic.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:44 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: Yeah, I know. The one I did for her dried in about 20 minutes even in this extreme humidity. I had to wipe some of mine off because it kept dripping onto my eyelashes and off my chin. lol

@brandy: But what will I look like by that point?

BTW, am I obligated to a threesome with my friends now? Her boyfriend didn’t end up having to work last night, so he spent the evening playing bartender and “fetching” stuff for us.

I should mention we were sober for the hair coloring and facials. I’m not completely stupid!

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:47 pm: [report]

You want to know what I am giving a guy that is worth the exchange for dinner, and I am telling you I don’t have to give him anything except gratitude, because dating is not a financial exchange, unless you are a prostitute. If you are a prostitute, that’s cool, just be upfront about it, like Alexa (no offense, Alexa, I say this with respect for what you do, though its not my thing).

Isn’t it interesting how everyone else is crazy, but you’re not? I could say more, but I already have said what I needed to, and so has Lareindeslames, Sam, JSW, and Tony, and just about everyone on this post. Also, I have to get ready for a benefit concert and to see my boyfriend, who happens to be a model.

I just wanted to see if you would come back and act crazy again, and you did. Ha ha. Good little troll. Like I said, I like you! You’re crazy!

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:50 pm: [report]

Wait, wait, let me try…

Um, luvtara, you’re being like a total B right now, and um, like you totally like don’t make any sense, so um, could you like totally um shut it?

What do you think guys? Will that get through?

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:50 pm: [report]

luvtara, haha! how do you know I’m ugly, for starters? I don’t even have a picture up. I have it on the good authority of several guy friends that I’m gorgeous. In fact, I’ve repaid some of their kindnesses using my very fantastic body and they have wanted me to be in their debt ever since.

You silly little girl. I’m sorry for your “boyfriend” if you’re this crazy. But since 23 is old, he’ll be gone soon, since you’re almost middle-aged as it is.

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:50 pm: [report]

By the way, since you seem to be more experienced in this than we are, would you mind advising majicksand on how she should pay her friend for her beauty services? Is a blowjob adequate payment for a facial? (Ummm… I think I just answered that myself)... will a handy suffice in payment for hair color, even if that color wasn’t that great and Majick had to do it over? I really want to know. Maybe you can ask your boyfriend.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:53 pm: [report]

@luvtara: Damn STRAIGHT!! Your so right. All these WHORES and there pussy boyFRIENDS who pay and pay AND NEVER GET ANY make me SICK!! I am SO SORRY I acted like such a CREEP last night. Its just cause I was so PISSED at these bitches here. I mean, these UNGRATEFUL entitled PRINCESSES havent given me SH|T in return even though I SLAVE away hear day after day trying to say NICE things about THEM. NONE of them have sended me naked pictures or ANYTHING. You’d think at least ONE of these SLUTS would HAVE THE DECENCY TO HAVE PHONE SEX WITH ME OR SOMETHING because of all the nice stuff I GO OUT OF MY WAY to right, but noooo. SO I am just ANGRY that I’m being IGNORED and doing all of THIS for THEM and all THEY do is just take and take from me and then go out and screw LOSERS who probably don’t do #&@$% for them just because these bitches like to go SLUMMING because sometimes they feel bad about being such STUCKUP GRAMMER NASIS or maybe they just feel good f*cking beneath there ENTITLED STATION IN LIFE.

So SCREW THEM ALL!!! If your AWESOME boyfriend ever screws up so bad that you dumb his sorry ass, PLEASE CALL ME because I will GLADLY buy you things if you’ll JUST do me the HONOR of paying me back with caring SEX for f*ck’s sake. OMFG I AM SO ANGRY AT THIS SITE!

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:56 pm: [report]

@jsw: rolflmao… as usual

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:57 pm: [report]

RAAGGGH SLUT BITCH LOSERS RRGHGGHG I AM A TROLL!!!! Oh, JSW, nakey pix on the way… just please don’t leave me for luvtrolla… !

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 12:58 pm: [report]

I’m going to at least TRY and be nice.

luvtara: When a gentleman is kind enough to invite me out to dinner and pay for my food, I return his kindness by inviting him out to dinner and paying for his food.

What you don’t seem to understand, my dear luvtara, is that YOU are the one promoting a quid pro quo (that’s ‘something for something’ in Latin, in case you were puzzling, my dear). The rest of us are positing a system wherein people are nice to each other not because they expect something in return, but because they genuinely enjoy the other person’s company.

I will grant that with you it probably doesn’t work that way. I doubt very many people genuinely enjoy your company, and that makes me very sad for you. So I can understand why your guy friends expect you to give them sexual favors—but perhaps, my darling, you should invest in some better friends. I’m sure SOMEONE out there finds your presence enjoyable. Maybe you should spend more time with that person.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:01 pm: [report]

Hey, I like my mom!

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:02 pm: [report]

it must be nice to live in luvtara’s world. I’m sure the trees grow candy and money.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:02 pm: [report]

@luvtara: I was trying to find a lingua franca which would work with you, so I was trying to speak to you in what seemed (from your other comments) to be an appropriate manner. I suppose I’d best just go back to knocking them out with shovels and tying them up.

@majicksand: Thank you, but you know, you owe me for those laughs. However, as mentioned above, I’ll happily accept a proxy.

@lareinedeslames: You could send me your pic. I mean, geez, you owe me.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:03 pm: [report]

@brandyalexander: Thanks! I just got the PM, and let me say, you look absolutely gorgeous in that lighting. I had no idea you actually dressed as a mermaid, but let me tell you, that was some kinky - in a good way - stuff. Thank you. You’re totally paid up, and now I’m the one in your debt, even more than before.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:06 pm: [report]

How am I a liar, exactly? Besides which, I never said that I got angry when a guy didn’t pay for my food. I said that I was of the opinion that the one doing the inviting takes on the responsibility of paying. I’ve paid for several dates, not because I expected anything from the guy, but because I did the inviting.

I also pay for my friends when I invite them out.

You really need to keep track of who has said one, my dearest luvtara.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:07 pm: [report]

And, luvtara, by the way, I am good friends with all 500 kids I went to college with. In fact, I’m such good friends with them that the ones who have gone on to become editors have featured my works in their literary magazines. I am also friends with my professors.

See, unlike you, I don’t have to use sex to be charming.

brandyalexander
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:08 pm: [report]

Oh, jsw, i’m glad you like the tail. You know, some men are really intimidated by the tail… but I’m glad that you like it. More to come…

Sigh… I’m outta here, I leave this in your capable hands, I’m sure there will be plenty of quality crazy to read through when I come back…

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:10 pm: [report]

@jsw: Can I send luvtara? She seems to really enjoy the sex-for-favors trade off, so it seems like a perfect fit. I mean, I’d love to accomodate you myself, but as my loving husband so kindly allowed me to go out with my friend last night, I will be otherwise occupied “expressing my gratitude” to him.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:11 pm: [report]

@myfavealcohol: why don’t I get a picture? I supported you!

I will be departing in about thirty minutes myself. The roommate and I are going to see Final Destination in 3d, and he’s offered to pay. I’m not having sex with him afterward, because that would be awkward for both of us, but I’ll probably make him some dinner.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:13 pm: [report]

luvtara, sweetheart, you should really pay attention to what people say before you complain. I HAVE gone out and protested affirmative action. I’ve also never taken a position that would have been granted to me because I am a woman. Can you say the same?

ootie
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:13 pm: [report]

Luvtara absolutely has to be guy. She’s advocating having extremely low expectations for all males, and if they do do anything nice, you are obligated to sleep with them. No self respecting woman would say something like that.

@luvtara: Is your personality so incredibly awful that you feel like you have nothing to offer but your body? When I buy dinner for my boyfriend, I don’t except any corresponding amount of orgasms in return. All I want is the pleasure of his company at said meal. I have sex with him when I want to have sex with him, and when I don’t want to, I don’t. That’s because sex is a MUTUAL activity, not something you “give” someone else. Because, you know, you’re actually supposed to, like, enjoy it.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:14 pm: [report]

luvtara, did you miss the part where I mentioned paying for other people’s meals?

heh. Your “wonderful relationship” sounds like prostitution to me.

But then, you don’t read, do you?

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:22 pm: [report]

@brandyalexander: Oh, I love tail. Trust me, even if you don’t send any other pics, there will definitely be more to come, as it were.

@majicksand: I’d prefer someone else. I’m odd in that I actually prefer sexual activity with women I respect and like. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I’m sure grudge-f**king would be fun, but given that luvtara‘s been giving out favors to everyone who smiles at her, I’d need to send away for a custom-molded titanium condom first, and that’s just too muck work, especially since I’d need to attach it to the hazmat suit as well.

@lareinedeslames: I’m sorry to read that. I had a position in mind which I was going to offer solely because you were a woman. Alas.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:25 pm: [report]

@luvtara: I’d love to see you produce a picture of you with your boyfriend holding up a picture saying “screw you, Frisky whores”. I’d even make it my avatar for a while. However, I’m not too worried about you coming up with that. And if you do, sorry in advance for making you blow the photographer for the service of taking the pic.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:25 pm: [report]

@jsw: that depends on if we’re talking about a position… or a position. If you catch my drift.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:25 pm: [report]

I feel so left out. Am I not bitchy enough? I thought for sure I’d get a response when I offered her up to jsw to pay off my sex debt. Why don’t you hate me as much as everyone else luvtara? If you don’t insult me soon, it’s going to start affecting my self-esteem. Come on, give a girl some abuse!

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:30 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: Trust me, the position I have in mind won’t allow you to drift at all.

@majicksand: Your offer to pay your husband back led her to believe you were on her side of the argument. I’m surprised you’re posting now, with the debt you owe him. I can only imagine a situation involving a laptop and doggy style is allowing you to comment right now.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:36 pm: [report]

jsw, I don’t mind being tied down to one position. In fact, I prefer it to the free-swinging ways some people adopt.

I’d be happy to help you learn the ropes!

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:45 pm: [report]

Attention Frisky bloggers: Make sure you end the title of your blog article with “Second Date”. It will assure you a top spot in the “most commented” section. By far.

@lareinedeslames: I’m abraid that things might get too twisted, but I think the idea of getting “laid” is very appealing and I’m starting to cotton to the idea, and you won’t need to rope me into doing it. I look forward to giving you a chance to edjutecate me. I hope you’re not intimidated by the sisal my… well, you know.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:48 pm: [report]

haha. @jsw: I don’t think I can beat those puns. I want to, oh dear do I want to. But my puny LLS brain just can’t top that.

Well played.

*sam*
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:48 pm: [report]

OK, I’m back (woo) and can I just say that I am SO bloody confused!!!

let me see if I can understnd this:

1) You’re a WHORE (b/c lower case letters just won’t suffice) if you have sex with guy who’s ever paid for anything for you

2) But, you’re a DEMANDING PRINCESS if you expect that when a guy is nice and offers to spend money on you (be it a dinner or a slushee at the movies) that a simple “thank you” or, “I’ll be happy to buy next time” will suffice.

3) Therefore, the only way to avoid being a WHORE or a DEMANDING PRINCESS is to, wait? sleep with your man because your presence and gratitude could never amount to the money he spent on you??

I’m sorry luvtara I still don’t get it. Am I a whore because I’ve had sex with my bf after a date? or am I a demanding princess because I haven’t given him sex whenever he wants it, since he does pay the rent (and therefore I am forever sexually indebted to him for that gracious favor)??? Or am I somehow both because I expect him to pay for dinner when he asks to take me out and (gasp!) on top of it, do not guarantee sex later? Or wait, what happens when a guy (like my bf) takes me out, insists on paying (which has happened on more than one occasion thank you) and then whenever we get home, tells me he’s not in the mood? (which has also happened) —do I just rip his pants off and start going down on him then??

SOMEONE HELP ME UNDERSTAND!!! *tear*

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 01:56 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: Sooner or later, one of us had to run out of puns. It was bound to happen (chuckles to self). By the way, the position I had in mind didn’t involve knots, but we could add them if you prefer something other than me keeping you under control.

@*sam*: I think the easiest thing to do is simply to accept that you’re a whore, no matter what you do, instead of trying to figure out why you’re a whore.

*sam*
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 02:01 pm: [report]

@_jsw_: *sigh* you’re probably right. oh well. oh, and while I was talking to Chris last night, I mentioned the oil wrestling match, and he said he’s all for it (so long as I promise to actually dip him in chocolate later) so I guess all we need to do now is set up a date??

and, since you have been so sweet to me, I believe I owe you at least an e-blow, so, uhh, if we could arrange that as well, that would be great.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 02:06 pm: [report]

@*sam*: We’ll arrange for him to win it. I mean, what with him doing all he does for you, I’d hate to make him watch me being dipped in chocolate. I’ll just hope that someone else will pay attention to me because of the nice thing I’d be doing for letting him win. As far as the e-blow goes, just send me a recording you you making slurping sounds for a few minutes and I’ll fill in the rest.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 02:33 pm: [report]

@jsw: He says we have to wait until it’s dark because of my funny colored hair. I am having to type standing up right now though after my punishment for devaluing his “property”.

I’m working on your payment, really. I just need more time. I know a girl that might work. She owes me money from years ago, and I heard she’s a hooker now. She’s very pretty and she bathes at least twice a day—well she used to. Admittedly, I haven’t seen her in about 5 years, but she can’t have deteriorated but so much, right? Anyway, she works off her debt to me by working off my debt to you. Sound fair? My brother is a prosecutor, so I’m sure he can find her for me. I’ll get back to you.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 02:38 pm: [report]

@majicksand: I’m sorry about your punishment, but you need to be more careful about messing with that which isn’t truly yours. Which would include pretty much anything. Your friend sounds perfect, although I don’t know why you mentioned that she’s a prostitute… we’ve already established that it wouldn’t be luvtara and so, by default, she’d have to be a prostitute, since all other women are. But anyway, yes, I very much appreciate the gesture, which, I think, means I owe you now.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 02:39 pm: [report]

I hate dumb people, but it love whores.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 02:52 pm: [report]

@jsw: Yeah, I think the friend who colored my hair must now owe my husband too since she, technically, is the one who botched the color. When you combine that with the favors I owe her for the spa treatments and the favors I owe her boyfriend for making my drinks… wow, we’re having a real party now.

I think I’ll still see if I can locate “the pro” for you though. I mean seriously, that’s a complete win-win for me. First I would be collecting the debt she owes me. Second, since we are now even, that wold put YOU in MY debt. I’m really looking forward to that! :p

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 03:00 pm: [report]

@majicksand: I very much look forward to being in your… debt.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 03:19 pm: [report]

@jsw: Hold that thought. I think I’m getting ready to even the score again. Is there a reliable list somewhere on the net for how to use italics, bold, emoticons, etc. on a site like this? I can do a total of two faces (smiley and wink), but italics especially would be very helpful. If you’ll notice in my previous post, I tried the “sticking my tongue out” face, and it didn’t work.

Yes, I am a hopeless newb. Don’t judge me!

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 03:26 pm: [report]

So cool! She’s back! I was gonna threaten to sic her on you if you were NOT KIND in your reply to my question, jsw, but she wasn’t here. Now that she’s back, you have to be nice to me, or else!

@luvtara: In case you missed it, I’m feeling neglected here. You insult everyone else regularly. Why not me? I told you I’m a “diva bitch”, so I demand that you pay attention to me. Right now!

Since1981
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 03:32 pm: [report]

I’m confused…do I have to sleep with a guy that I’m not in a relationship with?

gabymar
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 03:34 pm: [report]

I just spent about 2 hours reading through all the comments - I’m on vacation so I have a LOT of free time =) (does being this lazy gets me in the LLSA?? or do I have to go out on a date first and be NOT KIND by not paying for dinner AND not giving* the guy some well earned sex?? )
...anyways I think we should all stop hating on poor luvtara…it is not her fault that she has 0 self esteem and therefore does not conceive the fact that her presence alone could be worth paying for a 30 dollar dinner…And no old fart on this blog could ever convince her otherwise, but i must say this has been EXTREMELY entertaining!!

Oh! and luvtara, although I am defending you, it is all an act ok KINDNESS so you do not owe me anything

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 03:38 pm: [report]

@majicksand: I’m out on my phone and too lazy to insert a link, but just click to my profile and click the URL there. I’ve compiled a list of what i’ve discovered there.

*sam*
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 03:54 pm: [report]

@luvtara: yeah, you’re right, I’m the moron. thanks for clearing that one up!!!

You really amaze me, you know that?? You started off with a somewhat decent argument: if you demand that a man pay for everything all the time and cater to your every whim, you’re being prissy and you should be more considerate.—fine, great, I agree with that. But then, you went of thee deep end and started making erroneous conclusions about what others were trying to say and in turn only came off sounding like a (yes, I’m throwing the ‘big guns out there) c*nt that doesn’t know how to logically debate a topic with others. It’s hard to figure out what you’re talking about since you keep contradicting yourself (because somehow if you sleep with a guy you’re only ‘dating’ [I’m assuming this means casually??] then you’re WHORE, but if you f*ck your bf as payment for dinner, then you’re a good, respectable gf—sorry, but that’s contradictory). Moreover, you have taken what others have tried explaining to you a million different times in a million different ways and twisted it into something that wasn’t even remotely close to what they were insinuating in the fist place.

and to top it off, you, like, umm, totally, like, sound, you know, kinda like, a not-smart person? and like, stuff. YOU like CAN’T seem to be able to like WORD a cohesive argument FOR like, us, to like, not-not, UNDERSTAND, like, at all. and uh then you like, completely, and like, totally, started being NOT KIND, like a total b*tch and like, calling, like, others, like, DOUCHE bags and like CREEPERS when like, they like, didn’t kinda like, deserve IT. and then like, whenever you were like, ‘I’m gonna take the high road’ and like, stuff, you kept being NOT KIND, and it like, to be like, honest, like, we just started f*cking with you because, you’re like, TOTALLY CRAZY.

(hopefully you could at least understand that last part).

that being said, I think I’m done here guys. it’s been fun and all, but, I’m bored with her now. She’s a very sad, misguided young woman and she’s too proud (or unstable) to take the time to understand anything we’ve said here.

and to everyone else, just remember: “arguing with a fool only proves that there are two.”

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 04:01 pm: [report]

@jsw: You are officially my <b>hero<b>

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 04:03 pm: [report]

Damn, I jacked it up. Do-over! hero

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 04:04 pm: [report]

Hehe! The little things excite me so.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 04:14 pm: [report]

@majicksand: I’m glad to be of service but sorry that it’s the little things that excite you.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 04:29 pm: [report]

@jsw: I can get excited over bigger things too, I’m not that picky. Though admittedly, as I’ve stated on another thread, size <b>does<b> matter. (Pardon me for over-using the stylized text for a while; the novelty <i>will<i> wear off eventually)

Uh oh, did I just admit I’m not a total spoiled princess, diva bitch and can be flexible? Oh crap, I’m jeopardizing my LLS status. I take it back; I take it all back!

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 04:31 pm: [report]

See, my ~~ineffectual~~ <del>tiny<del> non-existant girl brain needs the practice.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 04:33 pm: [report]

God, I suck at this. Maybe I should just go back to straight typing.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 04:52 pm: [report]

Watch out luvtara, you are in danger of being obselete. The Tenga “Flip Hole” is coming to a store near you!

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 04:54 pm: [report]

Finally! Is there no one else left to play with?

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 04:57 pm: [report]

Holy crap! I spelled obsolete wrong. Oops! Good thing the grammar-nazis aren’t watching.

FireDancer
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 04:58 pm: [report]

As a guy iI feel like this whole list of stuff is just common sense. Where I work we have a safety slogan"T.B.Y.A” Think Before You Act. Common Fellas Use that lump three feet above your ass for more than just a hat rack. You are making the rest of us look bad.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 05:00 pm: [report]

Oh no, fresh meat. Evade, FireDancer, evade!

Kati-Anne
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 05:12 pm: [report]

Ok, so I disagree with basically everything luvtara has ever said on this website during her loud, textual tirade, but really? 238 comments, most of which are responses to her, um, unpopular *cough* opinion? I mean the thread is really quite moving; it made me laugh, it made me cry, but mostly it just made me want to spew.
So consider yourselves verbally spanked my fellow Frisky commenters. But seeing as I just added another comment to the ever growing number, I guess I need to be punished too…

draymond
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 05:22 pm: [report]

You called your ex-girlfriend crazy? Why on earth are you dredging over former relationships on a first date in the first place! Talking about your former relationships, crazy or otherwise, on a first date is saying that you are still carrying trunkloads of emotional baggage.

My advice, male or female, do not bring up the subject of former relationships on the first date, and try not to be the first one to venture onto subject. Do not bring up the subject of your former relationships unless you are ready to first hear about their former relationships.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 05:25 pm: [report]

@Kati-Anne: It’s a moral imperative that the fight must go on. Much like how we’ll never leave Afghanistan.

Any-hoo, luvtara I don’t use sense or polite decorum in my arguments, so go smoke a pole you dumb space cadet bitchy moany (Not the good kind of moans) whory evil little cock trap.

Cheers!!!!1!

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 05:27 pm: [report]

Cheese, are you still drunk?

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 05:37 pm: [report]

@majicksand: I’m using words like decorum, so no.

Oh and btw the censored word was “coc|< trap”. Yes I called her that.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 05:40 pm: [report]

As to the length of this thread: I think it speaks volumes for the need for a FriskyForum. I hope we get an official one soon. I’m setting up an unofficial one now.

@majicksand: Indeed, I think he is. And now that I’m home and on a real keyboard, let me add that I’m thrilled to read that you’re flexible and that you suck.

Don’t worry about the formatting mishaps; the complete lack of assistance means even the best of us mess up often. Plus, you’ll occasionally see odd tags in my posts as I try to see if something else might work (that’s how I found out that the tags on that page all worked - trial and error).

For example, I’d like to see if the <big>big</big> and <small>small</small> tags work. And the <font face=“Times New Roman”>font</font> one. And the <h1>heading</h1>, <hr> rule, and a few types of lists:

And a paragraph formatting test.

Finally, I’d be thrilled if tables work:
<table border=“4” cellpadding=“2” cellspacing=“2” width=“100%”>
<tr>
<td>Column 1</td>
<td>Column 2</td>
</tr>
</table>

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 05:42 pm: [report]

Well, shucks, I guess I can rule all of those out. One last one: <tt>teletype fonts</tt>.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 05:45 pm: [report]

@jsw: Have I mentioned I am thoroughly turned on by guys who are good at things that totally baffle me? Geeks are so sexy. :kiss;

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 05:48 pm: [report]

@majicksand: Good to know I’ve got at least something going for me.

I’m going to try to step up my efforts to see if the admins of the site will either make a few changes or let me do them for free. Formatting in comments, easier access to Private Messages, a forum, and so forth would be really helpful and easy to add. We’ll see. But regardless, when my current Schrödinger’s Cat-like relationship situation is resolved, you can keep me in mind should your friends become lonely.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:00 pm: [report]

@_jsw_: It sucks that the blink html tag is disabled, because this is quite awesome:

Schrödinger’s Cat is <blink>NOT</blink> dead.

The only legitimate use of the blink tag in the whole world.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:19 pm: [report]

It is such a good thing I am able to laugh at myself. Otherwise my self-esteem would be shot to hell by now.

@jsw: So… your relationship is dead but on some unquantifiable level still alive but ultimately will, at some point, definitely be dead, so you’re planning for that eventuality so as to be prepared when the time comes.

Does that about sum up what I should tell my single girlfriends who may find witty geeks sexy?

Alison Wonderland
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:20 pm: [report]

http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/06/02/im-in-ur-quantum-box/

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:22 pm: [report]

@majicksand: It’d take a lot more than a single comment - and a lot more personal information that I’d care to divulge in public - to adequately explain, but yours is an effective summary. I have baggage, but it’s all nearly packed up.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:27 pm: [report]

@Alison Wonderland: Awesome link!

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:27 pm: [report]

http://xkcd.com/45/

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:29 pm: [report]

And this one is just as good as XKCD:

http://questionablecontent.net/view.php?comic=715

Love the QC!

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:33 pm: [report]

@CheeeeEEEEse: Your taste in webcomics is excellent. Or, if not excellent, apparently identical to mine. I’ve followed xkcd and QC since the beginning and love them both.

Alison Wonderland
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:34 pm: [report]

So Schrodinger’s Cat has an elbow and peanut butter fetish? Is he also a Furry?

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:41 pm: [report]

@jsw: Please tell me you can’t hem a pair of pants. If you can, I fear that luvtara will have been proven correct in her theory that my worth as a person is determined solely by my sexual skills and my willingness to employ them with abandon.

CheeeeEEEEse
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:42 pm: [report]

@jsw: I also read Sinfest, Ctrl Alt Del, Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal, Cyanide and Happiness, and a couple assorted ones.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:43 pm: [report]

@majicksand: I can’t hem a pair of pants well, if that works for you.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:43 pm: [report]

@Alison: Schrodinger’s Cat would HAVE to be a furry. Either that or be a self-hating cat.

@CheeeeEEEEse: Your taste in webcomics is, indeed, excellent. I do not, however buy that using words like ‘decorum’ means you’re not drunk. I use words like that when I’m drunk. Actually, I use fewer words like that when I’m sober…

@ all: I’m back, by the way. Just got home from the movies. I see luvtara has been using electronics at the pool. Maybe she’ll electrocute herself.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:44 pm: [report]

@CheeeeEEEEse: I read Ctrl Alt Del and Saturday Morning Breakfast Cereal. I’ll look into the others. Thanks!

@lareinedeslames: We missed you. Well, at least I did.

Alison Wonderland
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:46 pm: [report]

Speaking of Furry’s I bet you they don’t get a lot of second dates.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:47 pm: [report]

@cheeeeEEEEse: ooooh, sinfest! I love me some sinfest.

@jsw: I knew at least you’d miss me.

Alison Wonderland
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:48 pm: [report]

furries*

Damn I hope the grammar Nazis don’t see that.

majicksand
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 06:48 pm: [report]

Oh thank God! The quantum mechanics discussion is melting my feeble mind down to the consistency of soupy oatmeal. I feared I had nothing left to offer the world. I can still make killer costumes that impress my son’s friends at anime conventions though, so I guess I won’t be asking for that shovel and rope you offered up the other day.

_jsw_
wrote on August 29 2009 @ 09:57 pm: [report]

Troll troll troll your posts,
always being mean.
Angrily, angrily, angrily, angrily.
Life is but a bunch of elderly jealous loser bitch whores.

brandyalexander
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 04:00 pm: [report]

Yup, totally disgusting. In fact, he is tying me up and beating me with a shovel right now. Please send help…

brandyalexander
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 04:09 pm: [report]

Gabymar: Welcome!

*sam*
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 04:37 pm: [report]

@brandy: Hey!!! IDK if you heard, but _jsw_ set up a forum for us so we don’t have to keep using the comment threads

I’m going to PM you with the link, K???

(FYI: you have to register, and it would be helpful if you keep the name you use on here so we know who you are)

*sam*
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 04:53 pm: [report]

oops that was supposed to be to brandy and all

at any rate, if anyone wants the link you can PM either _jsw_ or myself (or any other forum member for that matter).

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 05:03 pm: [report]

luvtara knows the word tiresome? someone must have handed her a dictionary/thesaurus in her native language.

_jsw_
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 05:46 pm: [report]

All: the link to joining the forums mentioned by *sam* are in my profile. Please PM me (on this site) either before or when you join there, because I need to approve each new member (to prevent spoofing of others here) before you can post there. Also, anyone is free to join (although if you “luvtara” your posts, you might not stay forever). Please keep in mind that it just got set up yesterday, is the first forum I’ve ever set up personally, and will experience set-up and growing pains for a bit.

The sole purpose of it is to demonstrate to TheFrisky that a forum would be an excellent idea. There is no advertising, etc., and it’s on my $100/year hosting plan, so it isn’t guaranteed to be up 100% of the time. But… given that TheFrisky goes down not infrequently (good for a partner, bad for a website), it should at least be up when TheFrisky goes down (read into that whatever innuendo you will).

_jsw_
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 05:56 pm: [report]

Er, “is in my profile”.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 06:46 pm: [report]

@luvtara: as long as you make it possible, my darling, dearest luvtara. As long as you continue making asinine comments that not only demonstrate your lack of reading comprehension skills but also your less-than-stellar personality, I will keep being the charming, delightfully arrogant Queen of Swords.

Aidra
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 07:02 pm: [report]

Kind of makes me wonder why I dated a guy for some time that expected we split everything. I paid for my stuff, he paid for his. Every time. Dinner. Movies. Dates. Except for that movie ticket he bought me once and liked to mention every time we had a fight. Why was it such a shocker when I never got a birthday present or Valentine’s day card? Oh, wait!! He made me a tiny Easter basket once… the day after, when all the stuff was 50% off.

This same guy told me in the first couple months of our relationship that he was a, and I quote, “domineering #&@$%” which he honestly believed gave him a pass on maturing and changing for the better. Whenever he showed an unsavory side of himself he would inform me that he “warned” me and I “knew” what I was getting myself into. I’m glad I ended that.

*sam*
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 07:11 pm: [report]

@aidra: WOW, he sounds like a winner!!!

@_jsw_: I have a technical question which I’m assuming only your html expertise can answer—I put luvtara on my ‘ignore members’ list, but her posts keep showing up—why is this?? (my general guess is because it’s in this thread, but I thought that by putting her there, it would prevent me from seeing any of her new posts…)

gabymar
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 07:36 pm: [report]

@Aidra: good girl!! get rid of all the loosers :p

@luvtara: do you really believe that in order to have romance women should stick to 1950’s gender roles? and if what we look for is equality than you should forever give up on expecting ANYTHING romantic?? Doesn’t the fact that nobody here agrees with you tell you something?? whatever pill you’re on: go take it right now! there’s a reason why your shrink gave it to you in the first place!

Oh! and while you’re at it, rent a couple of Disney movies so you know what a PRINCESS is…

_jsw_
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 07:37 pm: [report]

@luvtara: Oh, please join the forums. It’s always fun with at least one troll around. Also, I’d love to see you and your BF holding up a TheFrisky sign just so we’d know you’re actually a woman with a boyfriend (no one here believes both are true).

Really, though, aren’t you tired of the charade?

@*sam*: I dunno. Maybe she’s actually a site admin and can’t be ignored. *conspiracy theory begins*

_jsw_
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 07:49 pm: [report]

@luvtara: Yes, by the way, my forum is going to cover Star Wars bed sheets (twin size only, the only size they were made), bed wetting (it’s my favorite fetish), and rejection by every female on Earth (if only just one would accept me for just a moment so I could lose my virginity). And of course I’m planning on sharing my secrets of raping and keeping young girls hostage in my basement (well, my mother’s). Except, well, I can’t get it up, so I just simulate the rape with stuffed animals and I don’t so much keep them hostage as they stick around until the candy runs out.

@lareinedeslames: I do prefer “Blades” to “Swords”, but as the owner of the name, you get to choose the translation you prefer.

Aidra
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 07:52 pm: [report]

Actually luvtara, I have to disagree with you. But I’m not going to start with someone who takes obvious pleasure in trying to push people’s buttons. It seems the more attention this person gets, the more they act a fool. How about we all collectively ignore them?

*sam*
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 08:29 pm: [report]

@_jsw_: OMG, you’re into peegasm’s too!?!?

oh, and I still have a set of Rainbow Bright and Strawberry Shortcake sheets (twin size of course)—we’re going to discuss those as well correct??

_jsw_
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 08:38 pm: [report]

@*sam*: I’m not sure what I’m into. I’m learning all from luvtara.

Antiquity
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 08:56 pm: [report]

Oh my god… I missed quite the dog and pony show. -giggles-

@Jsw: I like how she (Luvtara) doesn’t get your humor.

“I do apologize for so blatantly suggesting that I was going to tie you up, rape you, and then bury you. I hope the site can forgive me and not ban me by accepting the obviously fabricated excuse that I simply mean a shovel with which you could dig yourself in deeper or more rope with which to hang yourself. Of course, even those allusions are violent. I guess I’ll just walk away and go back to kicking puppies. “

This made me laugh so hard! My room mate thought I had lost my sanity and then I showed her the luvtara debacle going on and she also had a good giggle with me. I love this site. lol.

majicksand
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 09:10 pm: [report]

Back in the game for real tomorrow (this is a pain on my phone), but I wanted to add my carebear sheets to the discussion.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 09:12 pm: [report]

I have a queen bed, but Sailor Moon sheets ftw.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 09:57 pm: [report]

Some people attract attention by means of being delightful and witty, and paying attention to what those around them say. Some people even attract attention by doing nice things for others.

Some people attract attention by being morons.

_jsw_
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:01 pm: [report]

@Antiquity: I have to confess: I’m also luvtara. I set it all up just so I could write things. I actually wrote the lyrics to the song about a half mile up the page last week and needed an alter ego to stir things up so I could have a reason to post them. I’m sorry. But just in hopes of continuing to entertain you, I’ll post back as luvtara and, as before, misspell my member name as “jws” and insult myself some more, probably calling myself a creep, denying that I’m actually the luvtara alter-ego, and so on. But just remember: whenever you see luvtara post, it’s just me, playing the role of a troll, no matter how much “she” denies it. I can’t help myself. I really don’t know when I’ll stop posting as her.

@*sam*, majicksand, lareinedeslames: I’ll show you what’s under my sheets if you show me what’s under yours.

@luvtara: Aw, sugar, let’s make up, OK? You know if you tell me to go f**k myself, you’ll be the one getting it, since we’re one and the same. Deny it if you like. You know you’re just a figment of my imagination.

*sam*
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:16 pm: [report]

@_jsw_: LOL!!!! you’re awesome. oh, and FTR: you’re welcome to see what I keep under my sheets anytime (so long as you bring that rope )

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:20 pm: [report]

@*sam*: I gotta teach him how to use the rope first! Perhaps, after the greasing-up and paintball, I’ll give a workshop on proper rope work?

oh, luvtara, I didn’t realize that you and jsw are one and the same! I knew there was a reason I found myself profoundly attracted to you. That big, sexy brain of yours!

_jsw_
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:25 pm: [report]

JWS you really know how to make me vomit. Like I could ever be you, you sick rapist pervert!! Even if you TIED ME UP and raped me and told me you were going to BURY me I’d NEVER EVER act like I was YOU! While you’re sitting around watching your mother knit panties for you and fantasizing that you will EVER get a woman with your tiny limp penis, I will be SCREWING my bf because he does things to me YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND.

Stop acting like I’m you, you sick #&@$% pervert.

And stop sucking up to him, you pathetic whores. Even though it’s the only sucking he’ll ever get. Bye now! I’m off to show my bf how much I care for him! =)

_jsw_
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:28 pm: [report]

Ah, darn it all. Now look what I did.

I forgot I was logged in as me when I posted as her. I guess the jig is up. Oh well. Even though I might try to post as luvtara again, I’m guessing no one will believe me. Man, all that work, blown because I mis-posted. How upsetting.

@*sam*: Just let me know when the coast is clear.

@lareinedeslames: When can I come there to learn? I hope you’ll open up and let me in on your secrets. And nice use of “brain” as a euphemism….

*sam*
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:31 pm: [report]

@_jsw_: that was pretty impressive, I’m not going to lie.

and lareinedeslames can I participate in this workshop?? PLEASE—I’m a sucker for proper rope work.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:36 pm: [report]

@*sam*: Everyone is welcome! It is important to know how to properly tie someone up, I mean, the possible debacles that come from improper rope work: escape, death, dismemberment…. I want to keep the public educated. No more David Carradine incidents.

I will also do a workshop on swordplay, if jsw will kindly allow.

@jsw: now you’ve gone and done it! I knew it was you all along, you minx. I should’ve figured it out when “luvtara” brought up the tying up. I’ll let you in on allllll my secrets…

_jsw_
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:41 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: My sword is yours for any demonstration of which you find it worthy, including sword swallowing. I will also willingly be the sub if you need to teach tying techniques. Never played that role before.

*sam*
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:42 pm: [report]

@lareinedeslames: so true!!! education is the best prevention

(side note:) YAY! I’m lucky commenter #300 on this thread. I wonder if there comes a point where they just start banning future comments…

*sam*
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:43 pm: [report]

*shakes fist angrily* “damn you _jsw_, damn you and your nimble fingers!!!

_jsw_
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:45 pm: [report]

@*sam*: How did you know they were so nimble?

*looks around*

Who’s been talking? Hmph. No one keeps secrets anymore.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 30 2009 @ 10:47 pm: [report]

@jsw: You know, the domme would be a novel position for me, as well. I have more experience being tied than tying. But I know how to do it right. And how did you know one of my favorite things is sword-swallowing? You cheeky monkey. You’re a psychic, aren’t you? Does that make luvtara a psychic by mathematical logic?

@sam: We’ll find out, I’m sure. Any time now.

_jsw_
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 01:21 am: [report]

That time, I remembered to log in as my alter ego.

Er, I mean, luvtara isn’t just me pretending to be a troll. Nope. She’s someone else entirely. Not me.

Or so I’d have you believe….

majicksand
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 08:01 am: [report]

So, jsw, the alter-ego thing is brilliant. Thank you so much for keeping us all so entertained. I’m seriously considering sending you my best friend’s info at this point. She needs a great guy. Understand, the fact that my mind has even wandered in that direction is HUGE. We’ve been best friends since we were 2. I love her so much I risked forever pissing off two families when I threatened to hunt down and kill her (now ex) husband if he ever hurt her. We were in the receiving line at her wedding reception at the time. Oops! Luckily, her mom loves me. She told me later that she wished she had a BFF like me. Phew!

_jsw_
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 08:21 am: [report]

@majicksand: Thanks for the compliments. First, as far as luvtara goes, well, sometimes I get so into that role that, when I’m posting as luvtara, I forget it’s actually me. I’ve tried to shake it up a bit… you’ll notice that I’ve stopped using so many capitalized words as part of an effort to show I’m now “back on my meds.” However, since I’m tired of replying in such an angry tone, and since it takes effort to appear to be so dense, angry, self-righteous, and semi-illiterate, I’ll probably stop soon. I mean, sure, I’ll post a few more pathetic cries for attention, but I think it’s pretty much all winding down now.

And as far as your friends go, that’s truly an honor. We’ll chat offline. However, since I can only assume that you did, in fact, hunt down and kill her ex husband, I’m a bit wary of perhaps causing her inadvertent pain by bringing home dairy products she’s allergic to or whatnot.

majicksand
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 08:43 am: [report]

@jsw: Naw, he’s alive and well as far as I know. They live in Ohio, so he wasn’t close enough to kill easily. Beyond that, she’s a big girl. She handled her divorce quite well all by herself. I was quite proud considering she’s one of those super-nice shy types that inevitably gets taken advantage of routinely. I guess that’s how she has managed to remain BFFs with a diva bitch like myself for all these years.

tk_2009
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 08:45 am: [report]

@luvtara: You love this, don’t you? I mean, if your life is so full and wonderful, what reason would you have that would make you want to fight for an argument that no one is ever going to agree with? It must be obvious to you that you are making no headway, and that most everyone on here is having some fun at your expense, not that you make that difficult.

I can’t imagine what you are possibly getting from all of this. I mean, the other posters are all chatting with each other as much as they are rebuking your nonsense, trying to build a sense of community, enjoying a healthy discourse on many topics, not just this post.

BTW: I notice you made some eerily similar remarks on the Tucker Max post. I also notice your status is listed as single despite all your boyfriend talk. A typo perhaps? Seems a bit deliberate, if I do say so. All I’m saying is that I am a bit confused by you at this point, because you seem to be here just to bicker with people and not to contribute anything really worthwhile. Not that I’m saying go away. Once I got away from this for a while and came back, reading your comments is a bit like going through the looking glass, which is a nice diversion.

tk_2009
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 08:51 am: [report]

@jsw: I like to validate other people’s imaginations (and yours seems especially vivid), we need more creativity in this world! Thank you, sir.

Here are some hints for your response: say something about how now I want to shove women through mirrors and I’m a loser because I am posting here too. Maybe call me a douche again too, that always adds a nice ring to a comment. Make sure you ignore the actual content of my comment. Bah, you don’t need the help, clearly these 300 some posts are evidence of your genius!

_jsw_
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 08:52 am: [report]

@tonykuehn: It indeed is interesting, if one steps away every once in a while, to probe this person to see hints of who is behind the façade. Either she’ll (or he’ll) stop posting altogether, or the real personality will emerge.

I mean, um, if it weren’t for the fact that it’s all me doing the posting as her.

_jsw_
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 08:56 am: [report]

@tonykuehn: I’ll do my best to reply appropriately. We’ll see. I might just ignore you altogether because I do try to play the role as semi-literate, and so I miss a lot of things when I’m luvtara. I might make a short reply, grouping you in with the other losers, or I might indeed insult you in the ways you suggested. I like to leave people guessing. I know that the general quality of my posts as her is faily consistent, but the exact ways I choose to express her are random, even to me. I don’t know what I’ll say until I log on as her, put on the aluminum foil hat, insert the stick into my butt, and start typing.

tk_2009
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 09:06 am: [report]

@jsw: maybe you should mention Hitler or the Nazis, make some really scathing comparisons. I mean, you’ve violated every other standard of debate already, why really play for the win?

Also, watch out for splinters, they can really cramp your style.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 09:54 am: [report]

You know, jsw, it’s not as fun now that I know luvtara is you. Could you maybe work on that? maybe luvtara could be extra-insulting, especially to jsw, so that I start to really think “she” is someone else. ‘Cause I mean, there are things some people won’t even say to themselves, right?

Or maybe luvtara could continue not reading what I actually say and put words in my mouth? That’d be a pretty good distinction.

_jsw_
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 09:55 am: [report]

@tonykuehn: I’d mention them, but it would be out of character because it would show a knowledge of history and of people outside of the town in which I grew up. And as far as splinters go, not really an issue. That thing’s been in and out so often after all these comments that it’s polished smooth.

_jsw_
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 09:59 am: [report]

@lareinedeslames: I’ll try, but I’ve already been pretty demeaning to myself, don’t you think? I’ll see if I can dig deeper, but… well, “deeper” doesn’t fit in with the shallow mind I envision for her. I sort of see her as a Tourette’s-ridden rodent that’s suddenly been given the ability to understand English (well, somewhat) and write (well, somewhat), so I keep the rants to simple topics. I can promise you, though, that if “she” replies to you, there won’t be anything in the reply to indicate that she actually comprehends what you’ve written.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 10:08 am: [report]

oh thank you, jsw! my poor little brain was just stretching to accommodate the idea that you and luvtara were the same, yet different. And remember, don’t run spell check on any of your posts as luvtara!

powplz
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 10:32 am: [report]

Dear the Frisky staff/editors: It’s time to lock this thread. Seriously. It needs to die.

_jsw_
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 10:35 am: [report]

@lareinedeslames and tonykuehn: I apologize for that. I’m really running out of insults and am a bit sleep-deprived and so mistakenly said that lareinedeslames and I would make a good couple - totally forgetting that I was a limp tiny-penised bondage rapist who couldn’t get a woman. And Tony, well, I’m clearly running out of insults. Really, a sad attempt on my part.

And yes, Powers that Be. Please lock this, or ban luvtara. Either action will cause the same end result.

lareinedeslames
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 10:41 am: [report]

@jsw: But there are so many OTHER things that we could do, if I’ve got you tied up.

@jswImeanluvtara: Of course jsw and I would make a great couple. He’s got such a big, sexy “brain.” I think you’re just jealous that, being jsw, you can’t have sex with him.

admins: haven’t you had enough yet?

_jsw_
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 10:56 am: [report]

Ah, if only I were into her. Alas.

Anyway, this will be my final post in this article. I hate giving luvtara the final word, but it’s just lost any ability to interest me. The insults are just too repetitive.

tk_2009
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 11:06 am: [report]

My last note here:

@luvtara: are you in some way suggesting that acting like or being a girl is demeaning? It certainly seems that way. To you, all my behaviors are negative, I’m dumb, whiny, crowd pleasing and fawning, therefore I’m acting like a girl? Your words, not mine.

@TheFrisky: Lock it down.

majicksand
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 11:36 am: [report]

Ok, one final comment:

Luvtara has continuously insisted that none of us here could possibly have relationships, much less satisfying, fulfilling ones. I’d like to say, for the record, that I am disgustingly, nauseatingly, happily married. My husband cooks, cleans, does laundry, irons, works full-time, is a great dad, and spoils me rotten—not only willingly but joyfully. He gets mildly annoyed when I forget myself and open my own doors. He’s knows I’m capable; he just enjoys doing the “little things”.

Lest he comes off as some kind of whipped pansy, he also plays guitar, shoots pool, works on cars, programs and repairs computers, and loves football and beer.

I am livin’ the dream y’all.

My ulterior motive in this post is to ask all of you to wish me luck on this final day of August. September begins “baby-making” month for us. We love our two sons and would not trade them for anything, but I’ve always wanted a girl. I get one last shot before the “baby-making factory” shuts down for good.

My husband is great with the idea of one more child, but I think I have him a little nervous. I’ve always wanted twin girls, and he’s seen my astounding abilities of will-power in action before!

C-ya on the forum and other new threads.

LunaLena
wrote on August 31 2009 @ 11:43 am: [report]

I can’t help noticing that luvtara keeps telling everyone how dumb they are, but can’t even get the three letters of _jsw_’s user name right. Nice touch, _jsw_, it makes her seem more like an authentic person!

On that note, the trolling is generating page hits, which is probably why this hasn’t been locked yet.