12 Things Mean Girls Do To Take Down the Competition

It’s no secret that women can be incredibly competitive and catty with each other. In yesterday’s post about Mean Girls we argued that no one can bring a woman down faster and harder than another woman. Right now, a lot of us are reconnecting with our own inner Mean Girls when it comes to Sarah Palin. We mock her out, attack her, and put her down in ways only we women really can. But of course, it’s not just Sarah Palin we’ve got beef with, is it? When it comes to other women competing for the same men, the same jobs, even the same last pair of chocolate brown leather riding boots in size 7 on sale for 50% off, we are out for blood. After the jump, 12 things Mean Girls do to take down the competition…

1. Ask the gorgeous woman who’s flirting with their longtime crush when she’s due.
2. Take photos of co-workers in compromising positions at Happy Hour and then tag them all over Facebook when up for the same promotion.
3. Put up a fake awesome Missed Connection ads for the nemesis, set up a date, then stand her up.
4. Tell her she’d look great with a pixie cut.
5. Give her the number of an old gynecologist — the one who wreaks of garlic, barely speaks English, and always makes inappropriate comments about the size of his patient’s cervix.
6. Tell her those last pair of chocolate brown leather riding boots in size 7 on sale for 50% off give her cankles.
7. Pass her number along to an old boyfriend who still lives at home with his parents and uses chopsticks to eat French fries because he thinks it makes him look “intercontinental”.
8. Nominate her for “What Not To Wear”.
9. Tell the new boyfriend when introducing him to the girls — the prettier, more in shape ones — that they’ve all got raging cases of herpes and wicked back acne.
10. Ask them to be bridesmaids (bad enough!) and make them wear ugly, unflattering dresses.
11. Post a link to an embarrassing YouTube video of the Republican VP nominee traipsing around in a swimsuit during a beauty pageant years ago.
12. Keep fingers crossed it helps keep her out of office.