10 Things Women Don’t Understand About Men
Posted by: Wendy Atterberry
Filed in:
relationships
1:30PM, Friday August 7th 2009
There may be a few things men don’t understand about women, but seriously, despite being the “simpler” sex, there are still lots of things we don’t get about them (scratchy sheets, anyone?). After the jump, 10 things about men that confound and boggle.
- What is so hard about asking for directions?
- Why do you need a gadget to unlock your car door?
- What is it about “Star Wars”?
- And the “bro hug”? Hug it out or don’t hug it out, you know?
- When you keep one seat between you and your buddy at the movies, are you saving room for the holy spirit or what?
- Why are you so hung up on the bitchy girls?
- If you want to break up with us, why don’t you say so?
- Forget about putting the seat down, why don’t you ever change the toilet paper roll?
- Why do you ask for our number if you have no intention of calling?
- Seriously, do you not smell that?
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Tags: dating, list, gender differences
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Comments
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ginger543
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 6:44 PM
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I never could get into Star Wars. I always thought it was funny that men usually blame the woman in the relationship for arriving late to any situation, when in all actuality, it took them too damn long to get up and get ready.
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Raugiel
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 6:45 PM
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I love starwars, but starwars marathons were a family rainy day activity when I was a kid...
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B1ll
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 6:51 PM
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They don't all apply but I'll take a stab at it:1. Ego2. Convenience. By the way, I don't see women avoiding those gadgets.3. It's all the games we played/liked as kids rolled into one. Keep in mind you always call us childish.4. MEN DON'T HUG!5. Nope, for us. Like the extra space to stretch out.6. Why are you so hung up on "edgy" guys7. That one is too individual: Cowardice, shame, feel bad about hurting someone, list can go on forever.8. Haven't the slightest9. Again, depends on the guy: We meant to call when we asked but someone else came along, we lost it, we just wanted to win the bet, etc., etc., etc.10. Smell what?
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VsegdaOdna
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 6:51 PM
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7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 7 I'll never understand the issue with number 7.
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ChoJinn
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 6:52 PM
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Easy:1) Because we should be able to find our way without them, under pretty much any circumstances. Satisfaction derived from doing this is worth the extra time it may take.3) Star Wars is great, period. Effects, Princess Leia, and, from a Freudian perspective, it's all about a boy/man's struggle to triumphantly succeed his parents.5) Nothing wrong with extra room, when allowable.6) Physically attractive girls can afford to be bitchy (or have other unattractive qualities), so reflexively if we put up with bitchy girls, it's because they are hot(ter), usually.9) Sometimes we ask for a number out of regret for wasting your time. Other times its to save an otherwise unsuccessful night out; the phone number is a victory, albeit a very small one.
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B1ll
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 6:53 PM
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@Ginger543. Sorry, but I don't want to think about the amount of time I've stood around waiting for a lady (yes, I went there) to be ready.
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Kathls
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 6:54 PM
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the holy spirit? LMAO!!!
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impoddity
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 6:57 PM
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I loved Star Wars for one simple reason: Harrison Ford. He was, and is, still smokin' hot!
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feinicstine
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 7:02 PM
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Hey, I love Star Wars. I get it. In fact, I think I get most of these. Here we go.1, 7, 9: fear of failure or being perceived as weak (because of societal pressure to be the manly man)2, 3, 8, 10: Perpetual childhood4, 5: Homophobia (thank society again)6: Yeah, I don't know. I'm going to go with ChoJinn on it.
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Jessica Wakeman
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 7:13 PM
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Also: there is a quarter of an inch of soap scum in the bottom of this bathtub, why are we bathing in it?
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Raugiel
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 7:23 PM
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@ChoJinn - I have some guy friends who seem to always pick the bitchiest girl who is also REALLY unattractive. These are guys who I have SEEN get offers from much more attractive women (I don't know how nice they were, but they were clearly better looking) and turned them down. I have always wondered what is up with that (the guy usually insists his new bitchqueen GF is hot, defying all logic). If you have the answer, throw it my way!Also, none of this is very fair. I've met women with all of these qualities and I've met men with stereotypically "female" qualities. As someone who is not into fuss or muss in the morning, I usually find myself waiting for the others in the group, men and women...
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Susannah Breslin
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 7:30 PM
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This is hilar.
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thesleepingman
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 7:40 PM
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What is so hard about asking for directions?It's not hard it's unnecessary. I am exactly where I want to be, completely and utterly lost.Why do you need a gadget to unlock your car door? It's cool? Duh.What is it about Star Wars? I couldn't tell you, it's just another movie trilogy to me.And the bro hug? Hug it out or dont hug it out, you know?Cultural differences. Indian men hold hands, American men bro hug. Wouldn't you raise an eyebrow if you saw your boyfriend holding hands with one of his friends?When you keep one seat between you and your buddy at the movies, are you saving room for the holy spirit or what?Arm room... *coughWhy are you so hung up on the bitchy girls?Haha, I'm not. I actually do my best to avoid all contact with them.If you want to break up with us, why dont you say so? Because you cry and we don't like people being sad, that's why we don't cry.Forget about putting the seat down, why dont you ever change the toilet paper roll?Pshh, tissues are basically pre-ripped tp.Why do you ask for our number if you have no intention of calling? Why do dogs bark?Seriously, do you not smell that?Nope, I really don't.
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Riley
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 7:54 PM
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1. I have no problem asking, just a problem paying attention.2. You'll thank me for it when it is raining or freezing out and you don't have to wait for me to unlock your door manually.3. What is it with Twilight?4. Seinfeld has addressed the man-hug, further discussion is not required.5. Those seats are tiny and I like to use both arm rests if possible.6. The same reason women are always hung up on the jackass ex.7. Avoiding confrontation and talking about things.8. Usually when I run out of TP it is because it is in use, no time to change rolls - need the backup ASAP.9. Timing, loss of interest, that bitchy girl finally returned my call.10. Yes, I smell it; if I ignore it long enough it will go away.
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LostInStars
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 8:19 PM
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@Riley: As a long time admirer of your commentary, may I say I love you?
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bogart4017
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 9:01 PM
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#5-because we have space issues dammit! Why do you think we don't want you up under us all the time?
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writergirl
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 9:22 PM
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YOu all are hilarious.
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SomeGuy84
wrote on August 7, 2009 @ 11:20 PM
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#1: I just don't like it, but I will if I have to.#2: Don't have a gadget for my car, I just use the key, but I do love gadgets in general.#3: Star Wars is ok, I'll watch if if it's all that's on.#4: Bro hug? I have a lot of 'bros,' I was in a fraternity, I don't really get this one.#5: As stupid as you think it is that we leave the seat empty, it is for us as to why it matters to you.#6: Bitchy girls... this is a good one for this list. It's because we know that there's no way we'd ever wanna marry a bitchy girl, so that takes a lot of the fear away. For me anyways, it's scary to talk to a girl that I think I actually could have a substantial future with. With a bitchy girl it's just like, 'alright, i'll do this for a couple weeks.'#7: Never had a problem with this, I'm very straightforward.#8: Don't notice it as often as girls do for obvious reasons.#9: At first we do intend to call, then it's like, I'll call her tomorrow, so on and so on, until it's so late we think we'd look foolish.#10: Like someone above said, 'smell what?'
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Tarvold
wrote on August 8, 2009 @ 12:48 AM
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1. Meh... we'll figure it out... it's just around the corner... isn't it? 2. Because deep down inside, we all want to be Bond. 3. Gadgets, sword fights, the force, leia, fast flying machines firing lasers at each other, abusive father and his final redemption... er.. hello? 4. Man contact is evil. Seriously. 5. When there's only one arm rest between you, how do you avoid unholy man contact? Best to avoid whenever possible. 6. Ego. Because deep down, we all want to be Tarzan... the one who tamed the beast. 7. Because even though we can't stand your crazy, we care. 8. Meh... there's always the magazines... 9. Trophy? Impressing the boys? Found someone better? Because somewhere inside, we already know who we want to date next... we just haven't figured out how to get her attention. 10. Smell that!??!? I'm PROUD of it! Give me a lighter, I want to light up the next one...
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cadyms
wrote on August 8, 2009 @ 3:22 AM
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No guesses here, just my (female) way of dealing with each: 1. What is so hard about asking for directions?I stop someone on the street and ask. My bf stays in the background, says "oh that makes sense" and off we go. Harder if we're in the car, unless I can convince him to pull over. But he's better w/me doing it than with him doing it, and I have no problem asking!2. Why do you need a gadget to unlock your car door?I don't get this one. A key? Or the remote thing that came with the car? I'd use that if I had one. 3. What is it about Star Wars?He enjoys Star Wars with the guys, but I rock Star Trek and Lord of the Rings and find it incredibly geeky and sexy that he does too!4. And the bro hug? Hug it out or dont hug it out, you know?My guy just says "hey," so can't help ya there.5. When you keep one seat between you and your buddy at the movies, are you saving room for the holy spirit or what?Hmmm...never seen this, as I guess I'm not there when it's just him and a buddy. :) 6. Why are you so hung up on the bitchy girls?Cause you're under 25 or you're sadomasochistic or she's really, really hot.7. If you want to break up with us, why dont you say so?Cause then you'd be the bad guy and you'd feel guilty, although once you find a woman you have a decent shot at sleeping with you'll probably get over the guilt.8. Forget about putting the seat down, why dont you ever change the toilet paper roll?My guy does, so can't help ya out on that one. Sometimes I forget, though...9. Why do you ask for our number if you have no intention of calling?Lol, from the world of size 14 girls, I just don't get the number being asked for thing too often. Albeit I also don't frequent bars, and tend to being in a long term relationship, but no - there are enough cute young hot things to fight over. :)10. Seriously, do you not smell that?He does, and he uses air freshener. Although I sometimes think the air freshener is worse!
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_jsw_
wrote on August 8, 2009 @ 4:10 AM
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<b>What is so hard about asking for directions?</b>Given that even my phone comes with a GPS, and I can buy one for $100, and the car probably has one too, I don't see the need to stop and ask someone to look at <i>their</i> GPS to give me directions. On a side note, thank God for GPSs coming along to give me a decent answer to this.<b>Why do you need a gadget to unlock your car door?</b>Because (a) almost all cars have them now, and (b) it's easier. Like, you know, cars are easier than walking or hitching rides on passing trains. Easier = better in most cases.<b>What is it about Star Wars?</b>When we were young and powerless, it made us feel like we could become powerful and important and get the girl. Even if she turned out to be our sister.<b>And the bro hug? Hug it out or dont hug it out, you know?</b>I'm on the "don't hug it out" side of that fence.<b>When you keep one seat between you and your buddy at the movies, are you saving room for the holy spirit or what?</b>It doubles the chance that a hot chick will randomly sit next to us. Duh.<b>Why are you so hung up on the bitchy girls?</b>Because they're better in bed.<b>If you want to break up with us, why dont you say so?</b>I think we assume that, if things have sunk to the point that even we know it's not working, surely you must already have figured it out.<b>Forget about putting the seat down, why dont you ever change the toilet paper roll?</b>Can't help you on this. I'm a freak about ensuring there's always at least one backup roll in addition to the next-batter-up roll. I will never run out of TP.<b>Why do you ask for our number if you have no intention of calling?</b>I've never done that and - I swear - have always called every number I've ever asked for.<b>Seriously, do you not smell that?</b>Of course. But it's masking the smell of our farts.<b>Added bonus: Also: there is a quarter of an inch of soap scum in the bottom of this bathtub, why are we bathing in it?</b>Um, because it's <i>soap</i>? Is this a trick question?
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stiffinp
wrote on August 9, 2009 @ 2:37 AM
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Lesse, heres my take on this.1)If I am still in North America, am I really lost?2)I don't need a gadget. The other item on my key ring is called "a key".3)Star Wars??? Excuse me, but STAR TREK rules!!!!4)I did a bro hug once. It didn't go very well.5)No, we're just waiting for a cute girl to fill it.6)I'm not hung up on bitchy girls. I just ignore them.7)Guilt. We have feelings too, you know.8)Because I can't find it, along with half of the other things in the house! Maybe its in the shed!9)So I will be prepared if I decide to call.10)Yes. Its the last person who sat in this chair!I hope this clears up any more confusion about my gender.
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taalibba
wrote on August 10, 2009 @ 1:28 AM
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I'm confused, what distinguishes a bro hug from a regular hug? Is that the quick tight hug with the pat on the back thing? Because I still consider that a hug.What I don't get...why the weird aversion to certain movies? Why is any movie that has any emotion it it automatically marked a "chick flick" even if that emotion is coming from men. If the answer is that real men dont do that, then why are soldiers in movies allowed to show the same emotion? Just thinkin out loud here, but I'd love to get peoples opinions
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Lioozhe
wrote on August 10, 2009 @ 4:17 AM
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1. I don't find it hard to ask for directions. I often enjoy trying to figure out things on my own though and seldom truly get lost. 2. I don't believe in power anything, including locks, windows, doors, steering. The power steering belt fell off my truck a year ago and I never replaced it. 3. I've never been a fan of Star Wars. I think some guys like it because it's based on the work of Leni Riefenstahl and exudes some of the same power of attraction. 4. I give my close guy friends a big hug and other guys I shake hands with, it's not really any woman's business. 5. I never sit a seat away from anyone unless they're wearing cologne or perfume I can't stand. 6. I guess it depends on your definition of "bitchy". I think some guys like them because at least they know where the girls stand on things instead of them acting subservient, dishonest or passive aggressive. Sort of like Jack Nicholson for women. 7. I keep breaking up with you, it's just that my dislike for you hasn't yet overcome my sexual attraction. This is your fault for treating our first night in bed together like confession. 8. Ok, you got me on that one. 9. I don't think I ever asked for a number that I didn't call. I used to like going out drinking and dancing though and having a great time with a woman I met and then just leaving. Cause it just isn't going to get any better than that. 10. Man, I wish I hadn't had raisin bran for breakfast.
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TokenMale
wrote on August 10, 2009 @ 5:24 AM
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My guess about not calling women back is that the man in question was too drunk and can't remember the person attached to the phone number clearly enough. Beer goggles are scary things.
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