10 Things We Learned About Men From Romantic Comedies

AChanceAtHeaven
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 10:13 am: [report]

11. When life hands you lemons, f**k the lemons and bail.
12. If you buy him a cereal container to keep his cereal fresh, he’ll love you forever. He’ll also have the freshest cereal.

_jsw_
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 10:32 am: [report]

@AChanceAtHeaven: I’ve tried #11, and let me tell you, it stings a bit, but you end up smelling really fresh.

River
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 11:01 am: [report]

13.  And they all lived happily ever after, without even a whiff of divorce or marital strife, despite probably only being romantically involved for the two or three weeks it takes for a movie plot to develop. 

majicksand
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 12:00 pm: [report]

14. The best romances develop in the midst of life-threatening chaos and trauma.  Bear in mind, however, that the couple who sneaks off to get freaky during the horror movie always dies.

Ginger
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 12:03 pm: [report]

#10 So…guys are creepy?
I don’t want Edward Cullen to fall in love with me and watch me while I sleep.

ThatWeirdGamerChick
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 12:10 pm: [report]

@ _jsw_ LOL!

I didn’t get a lot of these, at all. I mean, #1 and #2? I literally thought they were jokes. Are they…? If a guy wanted to spend the “rest of his life” with me the MINUTE WE MET, that’s called… obsession. Not love.
And I would never accept a proposal from a guy who is totally wasted (complements of #4). That’s just disrespectful, among other things.
#8, some like it rough. #9, guys with annoying friends tend to be… also annoying.
#10, that is usually “stalking”, not love.

Maybe I’m just a romantic-comedy hater, but most of these seem way off-base.

AChanceAtHeaven
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 12:13 pm: [report]

^ I believe they’re meant as jokes.

ThatWeirdGamerChick
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 12:16 pm: [report]

I hope so.
Some of them seem right though… like the first f-up one. People are allowed to mess up, right? Right? Right, guys?

xifeng882
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 01:24 pm: [report]

Ah ha! I get it now. So I should be looking for the gorgeous and excessively clingy Abercrombie model-look alike who just happens to be a very successful investment banker who just happens to be my best friend. But he won’t realize he’s in love with me for another 5 years so I need to desperately cling to him almost as much as he clings to me because only through becoming an obsessive stalker will he realize how incredible and perfect I am for him. And if he’s not particularly clingy then I really just have to follow his shadow. Good to know.

_jsw_
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 01:35 pm: [report]

@ThatWeirdGamerChick: Yes, these are all based on romcom plots and themes, where beautiful people meet, fall in love, break up at the end of the second act, wonder aimlessly (although, as an exception, I truly love the long shot of Hugh Grant in Notting Hill walking through the seasons), then fall in love again at the end.

@xifeng882: Exactly. And if you break up, please know that you’ll end up together in the end anyway, at least if you’re both beautiful and especially if he used to be a womanizer until he met you. Also, it helps if at least one of you has a dog.

ThumperTheory
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 03:04 pm: [report]

I agree, Ginger! I do *not* want Edward Cullen (or anyone else) watching me while I sleep; it’s not pretty! In fact, I hate Twilight (don’t worry, Insta-Enemies, I can also see how someone *could* like the series, so don’t start bashing me, but I read the entire thing & just can’t get myself to care one iota for any of the main character, except maybe the werewolf guy.)

I’m sorry, where was I going with that? Oh, yeah, I hate rom-coms, but I loved this hilarious take on what they “teach” us about men!

Ginger
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 03:25 pm: [report]

ThumperTheory, I hope you comment more in the future. I like your style.

effing hickster
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 04:05 pm: [report]

@Ginger: Either that or Christian Slater in Untamed Heart. Good movie, but boy…that takes stalking to a whole new level.

Santiago
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 05:14 pm: [report]

At first I thought your bullet points where serious (my head almost exploded) Then i read your intro

BTW Nice list.

magenta generation
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 07:20 pm: [report]

I think the mainstream rom-com is dying a slow and painful death. I saw the trailer for Butler/Heighl’s “The Ugly Truth,” and I wanted to simultaneously hurl and burn my eye sockets- it looked that bad to me.

I kind of like “He’s Just Not that into You” because I felt there was a little inkling of reality in there and “27 Dresses” was fun to watch but most rom-coms are purely wish fulfillment and at times lobotomizing at best. 

What started out as a genre filled with great writing and actors; most of the stuff with Tracy and Hepburn or better yet, Katherine Hepburn and Carey Grant (Yowza) come to mind. I know that times have changed and you either have mainstream romantic comedies bleed the best and once original plot twists from Hollywood’s Golden Age or they crank out simulacra from the post-modern masters of the genre (John Hughes, Nora Ephron and Rob Reiner)like a cinematic sweat shop. 

I haven’t seen (500) Days of Summer yet but I’ve heard good things and I think Kevin Smith (loved Chasing Amy alot) and the Farrelly Brothers (yes, you read correctly) have done a few things differently to breathe life into it but I’m hoping there has got to be a way to make romantic comedies great again. IDK. Sorry, long post but… I’m a film-geek passionate about one of my (former) favorite genres.

LunaLena
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 08:22 pm: [report]

@ magenta generation - have you seen Intolerable Cruelty?  George Clooney and Catherine Zeta-Jones were practically channeling Cary Grant and Katherine Hepburn.  The movie’s a really awesome modern take on those legendary screwball comedies.  I’m a huge fan of Audrey Hepburn myself, and I personally love classic romantic comedies like Roman Holiday, Adam’s Rib, and Some Like It Hot.

spark
wrote on September 12 2009 @ 09:32 pm: [report]

Author:

“If they are supposedly targeted to women, they somehow missed my demographic.”

Look up the word “demographic” before you use it.  You are trying to say that they missed YOU.  What you instead say is that they missed your sector of the population—young women—which they, in fact, have not missed.  That demographic is still the prime consumer of romantic comedies, even if you belong to it but do not enjoy them.

sameji
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 04:25 am: [report]

The author seems to be rather bitter towards either the genre or the people that perpetuate it, but perhaps I’m reading too much into things.

(rant ahead, please feel free to skip the rest of this comment)
One of my roommates is really into “chick flicks,” as I call them (not a big fan of the term “romantic comedy,” but that’s just me, call them whatever you like), while I prefer movies where one of three things happen:
1) Things blow up,
2) People die,
3) I am prompted to ponder something, even if it means pausing the movie and daydreaming for ten minutes.

As examples, I love V for Vendetta, Minority Report, the Lord of the Rings series, the Bourne movies, the James Bond movies, stuff like that. My roommate, for the most part, does not.

I do not like chick flicks.
Let me repeat this for good measure: I do not like chick flicks. At all.
My roommate somehow thinks that I am worth less as a woman because I do not enjoy the kinds of movies she watches, while I don’t really care if she likes the movies I like.

Seriously, she has made comments basically saying that she would force me to watch these movies if she could. I would rather eat a spider than watch The Notebook.

If you like chick flicks/romantic comedies/etc., I’m not hating on you, feel free to watch those- but please don’t presume that every woman watches that genre, and please don’t act like women who don’t like them are somehow not feminine.
(end rant; if you read all of this, thank you)

jackofhearts
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 06:13 am: [report]

Romantic comedies are not high art. They are a genre, which means they necessarily fufill certain precepts of the genre. I don’t think anyone who gets involved with a romcom -  from the scriptwriter to the person queuing up to by the ticket - expects anything more.

alleigh25
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 01:04 pm: [report]

@sameji—Romantic comedy and chick flick aren’t exactly the same. Not saying most romcoms aren’t chick flicks, because they are, but movies like A Walk to Remember are undeniably chick flicks but aren’t romantic comedies so much as dramas. Not an overly important distinction…I’m not sure there are overly many romantic comedies that wouldn’t be chick flick. Just saying.

What bothered me most about He’s Just Not That Into You…if a guy keeps telling you you’re the rule, not the exception, it means you’re the exception.
What bothers me about most chick flicks…if you cheat on or leave the person you’re with for “The One,” they’ll be completely happy for you and everything will work out perfectly for everyone.

drebella
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 01:21 pm: [report]

Here is what i have learned from romantic comedies…
everyone of my relationships have never been real relationships and no man has ever treated me anywhere close to apparently how he is supposed to, and i should probably just give up on relationships, and retire to eating tubs of chunky monkey and wearing sweats until i suppose i bump into Mr. Right in some quirky random setting where we hate each other right off the bat yet some how fall desperately and madly in love with no effort what so ever….
that being said:
i hate romcom/chickflicks and every friggin tv show that is basically one, sex in the city/twighlight/he just not into you…blah blah blah I would much rather sit down with wings/pizza and subs and watch one soccer game after another and then finish the night off with some good thriller/horror movie(zombies specifically.)Throw some playstation games in there as well and that is what i call a perfect night!

angel001717
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 01:55 pm: [report]

excuse me but i liked The Ugly Truth and He’s Just Not That Into You etc. so they are not always or are rarely accurate to real life. they are… FUN. which is what they were made to be, right?

retro chic
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 04:29 pm: [report]

I can’t say as I’ve learned much about men from rom-coms, only that men don’t like going to them. Not a fan of dick-flicks, either, so I don’t expect much love in return.

Movie fare for me has gotten lighter, less twisted, angst-provoking or message-y (unless I’ve heard great reviews of other darker fare). Now, good chick flicks, specifically rom-coms are the Mashed Potatoes of movie-watching — always satisfying, however predictable. I know, gross. I never thought I’d say that, but, after work, kid homework, household duties, etc, sometimes you just don’t want to think… only to be entertained in a benign, ridiculous formulaic way where the guy is inevitably redeemed and putty in her hand or some other less likely happy ending. Sometimes taters for your head is a lovely thing.

DancingGeek
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 06:32 pm: [report]

alleigh25- what bugged me about He’s Just Not That Into You was it did exactly the opposite of the book and everyone was suddenly the exception!

@ThumperTheory and Ginger- I had an ex send me poetry (months after thee breakup) which included lines about watching me sleep!

MissChaotic
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 09:53 pm: [report]

15 - If you crash their wedding, they will madly fall in love with you, drop their current girl, and chase you back to where you are and profess their love to you.

lawyrgrl
wrote on September 13 2009 @ 11:04 pm: [report]

I learned that opposites attract to the point that you are diametrically opposed in points of view, life experiences, humor, educational levels, religions, ect. & it makes absolutely no difference.  You can have nothing in common with the person other than both being carbon based life forms and you can still have a basis for a “true love.”  HA!  What total and complete crap!!!  Passion and infatuation, sure.  But actual happiness in living with each other?  Not bloody likely!

CptChaos
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 03:33 am: [report]

oh, mahn, you had to get me started!  Cliches away… (with mean cat goodness keep the diabetes at bay)
I didn’t mean for that to rhyme, sorry sorry sorry.

11.  His mother hates you but his sister(s)/brother(s) like you, or vice versa.  Mom/sibs come/s around after you a)perform A Heroick, b)Rescue “Mr. Right,” or c) eat some strange looking dish that’s been passed down in The Family and actually like it so much you ask for seconds, and then the recipe.  Sorry, you only get it if you marry Her Precious Son.
Oh yeah, or d)contract something incurable and fatal that only gives you hours/weeks/months to live. 1)Which you will do looking ravishingly gorgeous instead of like the friendly neighborhood zombie.
12.  Your parents and older siblings adore/hate him.  Coin flip over whether your big sister is homely/stunningly gorgeous and likes/hates Mr. Right.  Your big brother brings around several of his Street Gang/drag-racing/jock-eek friends for intimidation purposes. a)One or more of those friends has secretly loved you for a long, long time. a-1)(good steak sauce!)this friend tells Mr. Right ALL about it.  Coin flip for if it’s to your face or behind your back. 
13.  Your Totally Adorable Little Sister/Brother enchants him with the same antics that make you wish you were an only child.
14. He has a dog, and its name is “Mooch.” It’s as big as an elephaunt, sheds and slobbers all over the place, and it takes an instant liking to you. And your shoes, handbags, the clothes you’ve strewn around in the heat of passion, and that granola bar that was slowly turning into toxic waste in the bottom of your purse. Oh, and your favorite lipstick.  Can’t forget that.
15.  He likes your cat. The cat (whom you named “Fluffy” but whose secret name is actually “Genghis Khan”) hates him, and goes to great and terrible lengths to prove it.  No, you don’t want to know how. The Khan proceeds to completely and successfully terrorize Mooch, then his family, friends, kids,and all their pets.  What it did to Aunt Lila’s lap-yapper “Sweety Precious”(or vice versa)is particularly gruesome and not fit for your tender ears.  Let’s just say that you won’t see it or Aunt Lila ever again and leave it at that.
16.  a)Your best friend thinks he’s terribly adorable.  Genghis gives her a “what drug are you on?” glare and promptly turns her Office Casual outfit into Early Punk.
    b)she thinks he’s a tin-plated jerk and bad-mouths him throughout the movie.  Genghis knows who’s going to be his new human if you get real stupid and move in with/marry this guy.
  c)he’s her ex - flip a coin as to whether the breakup was benign or particularly nasty - sorry, no in-betweens - and chart her (and Genghis’)reactions from there.

I could add more, but it’s waaaaaaay past my bedtime and I’m starting to fade.  Feel free to embellish Genghis’ further actions against Mr. Right.

And maybe we should write our own rom-com?

elizabethmarley
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 09:16 am: [report]

#11: Go ahead and poach your perfect, rich dreamboat from that other girl! You’ll be married and pregnant within a year and nothing bad will ever happen. That other girl was evil anyway and only wanted him for his money, which you so don’t because you’re a public school teacher/part time journalist/radio personality with a swank apartment in Midtown.

Sounds bitter, but I actually love romantic comedies and I love that it all just works out no matter what. They make me smile.

Tart and Soul
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 10:23 am: [report]

What I learned from romantic flicks is how men only chase after women they love (and realize they’ve wronged) during rainstorms. Men must know how sexy and apologetic they look with rain dribbling down their cheeks. Every time it rains, I wait at my window for one of my exes to come running down the street having realized what a mistake he made dumping me. 

I, too, am not a fan of romantic flicks.  Check out this blog post I wrote, “He’s Just Not That Into You, Tellin’ It Like it Isn’t:”  http://tartandsoul.com/2009/03/08/he’s-just-not-that-into-you…tellin’-it-like-it-isn’t/

Keeper
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 10:25 am: [report]

#5 is great!  If the expectation is I only bring flowers when I mess up I’m gonna save myself A LOT of money for all the other times I bring my gal flowers.

casablancas
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 11:32 am: [report]

This makes a good point, but still, movies are made to be FICTIONAL representations of life - life as it “should be.” If anyone takes a romantic comedy and thinks it’s supposed to be absolutely realistic, that’s their own fault. Watch a documentary or read a periodical instead.

Just my two cents from the point of view of someone who actually writes films.

GreenAura
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 12:14 pm: [report]

The best romantic comedy EVER(if you can even toss it in that genre) is Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.  Period.  I saw He’s Just Not That Into You and I nearly vomitted at how women were portrayed.  That and Bride Wars made me really feel bad about my gender.  I don’t know any women that are like any of the characters in either of those movies.  Same with the guys.  I’m still waiting for a rom-com that portrays people as they really are.

majicksand
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 12:25 pm: [report]

@greenaura: Wouldn’t that defeat the purpose?  It would no longer be funny.

GreenAura
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 12:30 pm: [report]

@ majick: yeah, I suppose youre right… however, if someone followed around a few of the couples I know with video cameras and documented their relationships then put it on the big screen, I think it would be the funniest movie ever.  Sometimes just listening to their arguments is WAY more entertaining than any movie. Love your avatar by the way

majicksand
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 12:39 pm: [report]

Thanks.

retro chic
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 12:40 pm: [report]

Did I mention from first post rom-coms had to be GOOD too? I agree with the other bad ones named and then some. Apatow has taken rom-coms to a new low with the most unlikely pairings of high-functioning, beautiful women (mostly), and men that wouldn’t be given the time of day. Also, the Farrellys’ There’s Something About Mary and Shallow Hal, among others by other directors. I’m sorry they need cinematic revenge for their traumatic 20s dating experiences. So for those, I refer them to the dick-, not chick-flicks, subcategory.

canadiancutie
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 10:43 pm: [report]

The only thing I’ve learned from romantic comedies is how hot Hugh Grant once was and how hot Ryan Reynolds currently is. Nothing more.

canadiancutie
wrote on September 14 2009 @ 10:45 pm: [report]

Oh, I also learned that part of the reason men want girlfriends is so they have someone to hide behind when they want to see the newest rom-com. I am so sick of getting dragged to these things. But what are you supposed to do when they look at you all eagerly asking you to see the new Katherine Heigl? Crush their spirit?

For what it’s worth, All About Steve was bizarre (in a good way), and hilarious. Not your typical rom-com. Comes highly recommended by me.

Countess Mariska
wrote on September 25 2009 @ 08:02 am: [report]

I hated “When Harry Met Sally.” I couldn’t even enjoy what is clearly a very good and well-made film because I was so put off by its insistence that men and women can NEVER, BUT NEVER be actual friends. I felt awkward around my guy friends for a week.

TheUnusualSuspect
wrote on October 1 2009 @ 11:38 pm: [report]

@GreenAura I didn’t think Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind was a Romantic Comedy. Romance—Yes, but it wasn’t very comedic. I would call it a Fantasy Romance, or maybe just a Romance.

Two (women) friends told me they saw Lars and the Real Girl, and they thought it was hilarius. They loved it and laughed through the entire movie. On their recommendation, I watched it. (I’m a guy, by the way.) I didn’t laugh once during the entire movie, but I also loved it. I thought it was very subtle and insightful and heartwarming. I don’t know if I’d call it a Romantic Comedy or a Chick Flick. Maybe I’d call this one a Fantasy Romance as well.

But my favorite Romance/Romantic Comedy/Chick Flick is: Amelie.