If you like pickles as much as Snooki does (we do!), try slathering this briny balm all over your kisser. [$4.95 Amazon]
Is it a boy? A girl? A potato?
Bonus points for that brow cred.
Exceptions made for Josh Duggar, who need only write a note of apology to Jesus H. Christ.
Somebody call the wahmbulance.