Mombasa Bedding Siam Canopy, $29.99 [Macy's]
Palace 4-Poster Bed Canopy, $34.99 [Touch Of Class]
Nile Jewel Canopy, $30.99 [Overstock.com]
Is it a boy? A girl? A potato?
Bonus points for that brow cred.
Exceptions made for Josh Duggar, who need only write a note of apology to Jesus H. Christ.
Somebody call the wahmbulance.