What it does: "To get and maintain the perfect visage, you don't need the cosmetic surgeon's knife. All you need is a mouthpiece. Yes, the Face Slimmer is a simple solution to the timeless problem of how to give sagging facial skin and muscles that much-needed daily lift. Just three minutes per day is all you need; pop in the mold and then make mouth movements. The makers recommend you say vowel sounds out loud over and over again, producing regular and methodical exercises that will strength the twelve facial expression muscles in a comprehensive way."
What it looks like: Those shitty wax lips you sometimes got at Halloween. Those were the worst.
What it costs: $61