If your lady wants to run to the bedroom immediately after unwrapping your present (meaning your holiday gift, not the present in your pants), she probably liked it. For post-gift sex indicates that your present was thoughtful, touching, meaningful, and impressive. These gifts will not inspire any sort of arousal. If you hope to get laid this holiday season, you may want to avoid slipping these gifts under the tree.
Earlier reports that Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone were “on a break” have been rocked by new reports of hand-holding.
And they’re getting paid $7.5 million to write it.