I asked John DeVore what he would want to get from a serious girlfriend and he said "A globe. Or a pocket watch." Maybe he was making fun of me, but I happen to think a globe makes an excellent gift for a dude. This would look nice sitting on your man's desk or mantle. [$66, Amazon]
Bonus points for that brow cred.
Exceptions made for Josh Duggar, who need only write a note of apology to Jesus H. Christ.
Somebody call the wahmbulance.