When Paris Hilton was caught with a baggie containing nearly a gram of cocaine over the weekend, she told Las Vegas police officers that she thought it was gum. Then she backed up, telling the officers that the purse wasn't hers—she borrowed it from a friend, so some of the items in it weren't hers. This is comical because since when does coke look like gum? Also, since when does Paris have to borrow a purse—doesn't she have a different one for every day of the year, err, decade? [People]
But this isn't even the most outlandish excuse a star has given when being busted for drugs.
Today is Mariah Carey's 45th birthday and it's got me feeling emotions, specifically gratitude for all the wisdom about life and love that she has imparted through her music over. So in honor of Mimi's big day, here are those bits of wisdom, accompanied by GIFs of Mariah at her most divalicious.
It’s been a tough week, kids. I’m imagining you sitting in front of an open refrigerator, the buzz of the light dulling your existential thoughts. That seven-minute video of Tom Hanks paying homage to his body of work is playing on your laptop from the other room, for no one in particular. You’re…