$68, Victoria's Secret
Average Sexiness Rating: 2
"Wait, so you got me chocolates, ate them and then decided to wear the packaging as lingerie?"
"I could do without the fluffer-mask thing in her hand, but it looks like she has a definite plan on how to use it."
"This is a pure example of trying too hard. But on the plus side, it probably only cost $19.95 at Wal-Mart."
"Why does this look like two artless cakes were smooshed over this model?"
"She looks like boxes of mediocre Valentine's candies, like you could open her up to reveal melty chocolate."
"Here are a few things you could wear that would be sexier than this outfit: a suit of armor; a hockey jersey; a fully-loaded toolbelt; one of those bodysuits that makes it look like all your skin has been flayed off, revealing your muscles. The only thing that makes this excusable is I'm pretty sure no one except this model has ever worn it."
"Why would someone superglue their child's valentines day project to their underwear?"