Whether your bedroom walls were plastered with posters of Kirk Cameron, Jonathan Taylor Thomas, or Scott Baio, having a dreamy crush on your favorite TV character (and the actor who plays him) is standard practice for teenage girls. In fact, most women continue to crush on hot TV characters (sans bedroom posters) well into adulthood. While completely fictional and harmlessly delusional, it’s hard to argue that some of these men are more consistent and reliable in your life (thanks to network television scheduling) than the actual men you date.

However, should your TV crush ever cross into real feelings territory, here are some reminders as to why most of these devilishly handsome, roguish characters would be an absolute nightmare to date in real life. God forbid they came out of the safe confines of your flat screen and into your bedroom, these guys would drive you to drink at the very least, or into a mental institution at the worst. Click through to see which sexy television characters would be most likely to cause you a psychotic episode.