Myths About Dating Older Men Debunked

When I met the older man I briefly dated, I’d been drinking. And being that we all make bad decisions once we’ve had a few, I gave him my number. My real number. If I’d known that he was two years younger than my (gasp!) mother, I probably would have given him fake digits digits instead. But I was deceived. This dude was incredibly well-preserved and rolling with some friends who appeared to be about my age. There was no way I could have guessed how much older he was.

He bought me a beer and asked me my age.

“Twenty-six,” I answered. And at that moment, it seemed appropriate to ask his age. So I did, and I got a mysterious answer: “Guess.”

I guessed. “Thirty-one?” No. “Thirty-four?” No. “Twenty-five?” No. 

Bored with guessing, I gave up. It took weeks of hanging out, hooking up, and marathon texting for him to finally come clean about his DOB, and here’s why: he was nearly 20 years my senior. His oldest daughter was in high school. This revelation initially creeped me out—had I really made out with a 44-year-old? But I played it cool. After all, I’d heard there were so many perks to dating older guys. I decided to give him a shot.

After months of testing out the alleged benefits of dating older, I know better. These so-called perks are really just myths designed to mask a harsh reality—that drastic age gaps in relationships are considered creepy for a reason.

While I’m sure there are some great older, men out there, I’m choosing to date in my own age range from now on. Dating older guys isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. If you don’t want to be the arm candy he keeps handy in a vain attempt to recapture his youth, I recommend not dating anyone who’s closer to your parents’ age than your own. 

Click through to learn the cold, hard truth about dating a much older man.