“Spectacular Sea Hats” as Buzzfeed calls them, would not be so spectacular should this man, say, want to woo a lady. Or get her in the sack. Let’s face it, a man who wears a jellyfish hat is a man who goes to bed lonely. Note to all dudes considering a Spectacular Sea Hat purchase: Take the plush octopus off your head. And while we’re at it, here are some more hats that will not earn a man any points with the ladies…
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Propeller Hat
Fly far, far away from me, propeller hat man.
The Spirit Hood
Paws off, dude.
The Hair Visor
You’re better off with a bad toupee.
The Umbrella Hat
This hat is bound to keep any woman very, very dry.
Poop Hat
Yes. That’s a pile of poop.
The Ponytail Cap
There is truly no reason for a man to pretend to have long, flowing locks.
Cheetah Doo Rag
This will do nothing for your street cred.
The Hair Hat
A hat you can trim. Hmmmm.
I Love My Penis Hat
Good for you! GO AWAY!
The Beard Beanie
Don’t make me shave that hat off your face.
The TP Hat
He’s buddies with the guy who wears the poop hat.
Flower Pot Hat
You are supposed to give flowers, not wear them.
The Beer Hat
You can’t drink your beers like a normal human.
Corn Hat
On the cob, yes. On the head, no.
Hot Dog Hat
What a wiener.
Boob Inspector
Show up in that hat and you’re fired.
Penis Hat
This hat arouses nothing but fear in me.
The Porcupine Hat
Nobody will be running her hands through his quills.
Original by: Ami Angelowicz
