Nerd Girl Porn: 24 Guys Who Are Funny Hot

funny hots will arnett jpg
Scrolling through Will Arnett’s September GQ feature, I was overcome with jealousy towards Amy Poehler (sorry, Amy). Why? Because her husband is a “funny hot” or “fot” (not to be confused with a “never nude”). A “funny hot” is the Shan-gri-la of dudehood — funny enough to make me pee my pants and hot enough to make me drop them. WORD. After the jump, some more “funny hots” I want to make beautiful laughter with. [GQ]

Rachel Zoe And Barbie Collide, The World Goes Bananas!

Barbie makes an appearance on tonight’s episode of “The Rachel Zoe Project.” Mattel created a Barbie in Rachel‘s likeness (left), and she, in turn, styled Barbie for a red carpet appearance (right). Mattel got Rachel completely right — from her oversized sunnies down to her extra flared-leg jeans. But I’m not too impressed with styled-by-Rachel-Zoe Barbie. Why? Because she looks like every other collectible Barbie doll. Check out a clip of the episode, in which Rachel reveals the Barbies to Brad, after the jump. Keep reading »

Danielle Staub Warbles Again — This Time With Backup Dancers!

Hey guys, how did you spend your morning? Mine was significantly less exciting than Danielle Staub’s. She made her morning news performance debut on New York’s “PIX Morning News,” performing her song “Real Close” alongside a harem of gay male dancers and her possible-romantic partner Lori Michaels. It’s pretty impossible for me to put into words how amazingly atrocious this performance is. Here, let Ami try: “Noooooo! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! My day is over.” Meanwhile, Annika thinks it’s terribly sad that Danielle has stolen her younger daughter’s dream of being a singer, to which Julie adds, “Yes, and that isn’t even the saddest thing in that girl’s life.” True. Also: “I feel like my soul has been sucked out of my body.” Yes, that just about sums it up. [PIX Morning News] Keep reading »

Wanderlust: Why It’s Easier To Meet Men On Vacation

It would be hard to find a more fitting pair than that of sex and travel. Here, one adventurer, who has kissed an uncounted number of men who don’t share her zip code, shares her experience combining the two through more than 30 countries for our “End of Summer Escapes” series.

There have been many times

I’m not suggesting you stick your tongue into the mouth of the first guy you meet; I’m merely suggesting you use your trip to really chill out.

But the minute we book a trip, hop on flight, and relocate our gabfest to, say, a weekend in Miami, everything changes. The halter dresses come out along with the wavy non-blow-dried hair. The anxiety over feeling stuck in a cubicle fades, and we’re actually smiling for no reason. We’re not hunched over, balancing our winter coats on our laps. Instead we’re approachable, and the guys actually start approaching. Sometimes we meet one guy, sometimes a group, but it’s almost a guarantee. The only thing that’s the same as those chilly bar nights back home are the martinis. Actually, I’m lying about that — two months ago, I decided vodka tonics are my drink of choice since there’s less spillage while wearing heels.

So, why is it easier to meet guys when traveling? Well, for one, “where are you from?” is actually a non-cheesy pickup line that works perfectly on vacation. Right away, it’s easy to see whether you click or not (like, if he’s there on a hunting expedition). If not, there will be another guy coming your way. As a side note, I do not look like a supermodel, nor do I have bronze lean legs or long blond hair. I would call myself a 6.5. But still, even as a woman who thinks she’s just slightly above average on that stupid one-to-10 scale, my newfound willingness to have fun intrigues men. Plus, vacationing males are also out of their element, creating a ballsier atmosphere on both sides. Speaking of ballsy, while away from home I also learn to do the talking — especially when it comes to asking the guy next to me for the time (which is usually irrelevant), or even an “I’m drunk” cigarette. And very soon, sitting at the bar turns into dancing near the bar (sometimes on the bar), which turns into a crawl to the “trendier” bar next door. If it goes well, brunch the next day is always an option. (There’s sometimes more action involving hot tubs, but my husband wouldn’t appreciate reading the details.)

After all, it’s vacation. Where else are you going to be on a noon-to-3 a.m. schedule when your entire agenda for the day is composed of lounging, eating, and drinking? But

I’m not suggesting you stick your tongue into the mouth of the first guy you meet; I’m merely suggesting you use your trip to really chill out.

When you’re lying in the sun (wearing sunscreen, of course) on that postcard-looking beach, you can finally relax and let your guard down. And even if you don’t end up in a “serious relationship” after a few days in paradise, at least you’ll leave with a few vacation pics to show your friends at home. But please, don’t share them with the hot guy you went on a date with before you left.

Skinny Jeans Are The Downfall Of The American Man, Says Lady Who Needs A Hug

Sometimes I like to write in a dry style. When I do this, it’s amusing to read comments by commenters who don’t understand that I’m being sarcastic. So I hoped this op-ed which popped up in my Google alerts, “Skinny Jeans, John Wayne, And The Feminization Of America,” was also being very dry. But in fact this author, Jane Gilvary, is quite serious that men in skinny jeans are the downfall of America. How about this gem?

“… real men don’t wear skinny jeans. Real men also don’t wear V-neck tees, or accessorized scarves, and they avoid purple and pink like the plague. The mere idea of a pedicure or waxing makes a real man nauseous. If a woman hangs out with this kind of girly-man routinely, it’s only because she wants to share his wardrobe and his non-fat caramel macchiato.”

Well, menswear-as-womenswear is hot right now. Keep reading »

Bad “Cosmo” Advice: Become A Rock Band Groupie

We admit, we don’t hold Cosmopolitan magazine to a particularly high standard or anything — but sometimes even we are floored by how utterly ridiculous their advice can be. When they advised that it would be as easy as 1, 2, 3 — “Step one: go to this spot. Step two: Find man. Step three: thank us for giving you this tip” — to meet a new dude we were curious. But oh, oh the advice was so wrong.

Cosmo thinks the hot new spot for meeting guys is at bar’s cover band nights. Cover. Band. Nights. Keep reading »

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