For two seasons now, those “Jersey Shore”
GTLers had been a fascinating source of amusement for me. Watching the show made me feel like Jane Goodall studying in da clubs. The cast members’ attitudes towards life seemed naively adorable, and it all seemed like a fascinating subculture. Heck, when someone called my pompadour a Snooki
bump, I thought that was awesome. I liked the show so much that I turned a blind eye to the misogyny of the show—the “hippos,” the “landmines,” the “grenades.” Until last week’s episode finally broke me.
Believe me, I never thought I would ever stand up for Angelina, E.V.E.R. But then JWoww, Snooki, and the boys all called her a “whore” for doing exactly what the guys do every night—screwing whatever they can. Even JWoww, in her confessional, and I’m paraphrasing here, said she disapproved of Angelina’s sluttiness. That’s some girl on girl crime right there!
I’ve finally come to the conclusion that the cast and I would hate each other in real life, so why do I spend an hour a week listening to their crap? That’s it for me, folks. Forget you “Jersey Shore.” The worst part is that, except for Sammi, none of them are even from frickin’ Jersey! Curses on them for giving the Garden State a bad rep. The thing is, New Jersey actually has a lot of really talented sons and daughters. So, let’s focus our attention on these awesome peeps who represent Le Jerz proud and loud and fist pump free.