You already know how I feel about a woman saying “ I love you” first, but whether you agree with my stance or just aren’t ready to blurt out the “L” word quite yet, there are plenty of ways to tell a guy how you feel without spelling it out explicitly. After the jump, fifteen ways to tell a guy you love him without saying it aloud. Keep reading »
It’s difficult to have a remarkable Valentine’s Day. A person can only eat a limited amount of drugstore chocolate before gagging in disgust. Red roses are cliche. And gushing over wack jewelry is harder than it looks, unless you’re an Oscar-winning actress. To add a little spice to the day a Michigan zoo came up with “Zoorotica,” which will allow couples to watch animals mating and promises to make Feb. 14 a day to remember. Yeah, filled with unpleasant memories. More details, after the jump… Keep reading »
I was best friends with this guy all through college. Senior year we figured out we were attracted to each other and secretly hooked up a couple of times even though we were both in very serious relationships. We continued to hook up whenever we saw each other, but we never spoke about an actual relationship or our real feelings for one another.
Fast forward to last year — we had a very intense email correspondence going, telling each other how much we loved each other, and how we would try our best to make a relationship work, despite us living on opposite coasts with promising careers. At this time he was in a serious long-term relationship with another girl but he intimated that he would break up with her when he returned. I went to visit him for a week. During that trip, I learned that he was planning to buy a house and move in with his long-term girlfriend. I was pissed off and didn’t speak to him for a year. He and his girlfriend are now living the perfect suburban dream.
A couple of months ago, when he was visiting the west coast, I saw him. It was wonderful and we hooked up again. The last night he was in town, we stayed up all night talking—it was intense. I wanted to tell him how much he had hurt me before, but I didn’t want to ruin a perfect night. So, I emailed him after he left and told him how much he had hurt me, how much he meant to me, and how I was still willing to make something work. I haven’t heard from him for two months. I’m totally kicking myself, but I still want to believe in my heart that this just isn’t the time for us, and that the time might come someday. My birthday is 11/29/78, time 7:56am, in Washington. His birthday is 9/26/78. Do we have a chance in hell or am I another doormat? — Confused Keep reading »
Last night formerly super hot Joaquin Phoenix made a really bizarro appearance on David Letterman, and generally came off like a zonked out, frowning weirdo. Here’s the thing. I think it’s all a stupid “celebrity punking the media” publicity stunt to go along with his bogus fore into rap music. After all, Casey Affleck is doing a documentary on him and maybe that documentary is going to be called, “HAHA Suckers!” This is the dude that decided to go by the name Leaf for, like, a decade. Keep reading »
I have never met a woman who thought she was bad in bed. I have known plenty of women who can rattle off an impromptu, critical dissertation on the carnal failings of most men. “He didn’t get me off.” “He treated my nipples like Xbox control sticks.” “He came before his pants were off.”
No, not all women are great in bed. Is the onus on dudes to break the bedsprings? I say no. It is both of our responsibilities to be the best lay possible. There are women who kick back Cleopatra-style and dare their men to please them. Women who use men like giant, hairy vibrators, and women who are so eager to please, it can be overwhelming. Keep reading »
Valentine’s Day Don’ts For Daring Women
Do not use indelible Magic Markers to write lewd things on your body. They don’t wash off. Use something aloe based instead.
Do not answer the door dressed only in Saran Wrap. The leech across the hall has a hidden camera trained on your door with YouTube written all over it.
Do not insist he drop his Fruit of the Looms and model the thong you got him. He could get hurt.
Do not confiscate the mic from the lounge singer to do raunchy lyrics to “My Horny Valentine.”
Keep reading »
In the spirit of Valentine’s Day, we asked a few of our favorite musicians for their favorite love songs (and no, they couldn’t pick one of their own tunes). After the jump, Katy Perry, Nina Persson, The Fray, and others share their favorite love songs of all time. Keep reading »