Everyone thinks I’m an a-hole right now. Not because I’m trying to get everybody at Grandpa’s funeral to play Rock Band. No, I’m in love—and I can’t stop talking about it.
Butterflies in my stomach, stars in my eyes, I arrive at the office every morning with a new story about something adorable he’s done. We made waffles! We said the L-word! We talked about baby names! I told one of my co-workers about the love note he penned and five seconds in, she had stopped listening.
So I guffawed when I read Vice‘s “Guide To Being Totally Crushed Out”, an alphabetized list of things we do when we’ve got a crush, from “Only Calling To Hear His Voice And Then Hanging Up,” to “Jerking Off About Her.”
And, of course, “Telling Everyone In The World”… Keep reading »
Simcha, Kate, what’s the big deal in going to a wedding sans date? I’ve gone to several weddings solo, and it never occurred to me that I should: A) feel offended that my invitation didn’t include a “plus one,” or that B) I should feel the least bit insecure that I didn’t have a “plus one” to invite anyway. One of the weddings I went to solo was shortly after a bad breakup in which I found myself truly single for the first time in several years, and it was for a snotty cousin who was five years younger than I and who positively delighted in “beating” me to the altar. But, so what? I had plenty of family to catch up with, enough cute boys to smile at, and an open bar to make even the most mundane of weddings tolerable. And even if I had thought to invite a guest (and had gotten the okay from the couple), I can’t imagine a more awkward date than dragging some poor guy I was just getting to know to a boring wedding (and come on, they’re all mostly boring) where he’d be forced to schmooze with my entire extended family and answer questions about when he planned to put a ring on it. Sure, the alternative meant being questioned about my single status, but I doubt any of the old ninnies who pressed me about it really spent more than a few minutes worrying about the state of my love life. After the jump, the seven reasons you’re better off going to a wedding without a date. Keep reading »
“I had to grow the hair down there. But because of years of waxing, as all of us girls know, it doesn’t come back quite the way it used to. They even made me a merkin — a wig — because they were so concerned that I might not be able to grow enough.”
— Kate Winslet to Allure, on the importance of authentic pubic hair for her role in “The Reader” [via AHN]
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Oh let’s just start off Hump Day with this adorable sweetness. Bessie, a wire-haired dachshund, has stepped in as a maternal figure for this nameless tiger baby at a zoo in Germany. [6/2/09] Keep reading »
We’re not sure whether to be insulted or overjoyed by Rolls-Royce’s new concept car. The 200EX features a backseat pop-out purse holder that senses when you put down a bag and holds it in place. We hate that the car company thinks women are all about handbags, but, you know what, we are. (In fact, we were just drooling over Marc by Marc Jacobs’ new bags.) It would be nice to be able to make sharp turns without have our handbag tumble to the floor, spewing tubes of lipstick everywhere. And, if you’re driving a Rolls, you probably have a super-nice purse that you’d want to preserve. Our bag on the other hand, cost $15 on eBay. [Luxuo] Keep reading »
Just when you thought it was safe to go back to surfing the Internet, Hustler has announced it’s got yet another adult movie spoofing the life and times of former vice-presidential candidate and governor of Alaska Sarah Palin. When it comes to XXX, Palin moves product, apparently. First, there was “Who’s Nailin’ Paylin?” Then, there was “Obama Is Nailin’ Palin.” (Guess we got that question answered.) Now, the X-rated empire Larry Flynt built is producing “Hollywood’s Nailin’ Palin,” in which, among other surely tawdry deeds, “Sarah Palin” gets it on with “Tina Fey” playing Sarah Palin on “SNL.” It’s all so confusing. In any case, the sure to be, um, fascinating latest homage to the politician who will not go away is set to be released early this summer. You know, if you’re into that sort of thing. By which I mean politics. [Sexaminer] Keep reading »
So, the s**t hit the fan on “The Real Housewives of New Jersey” last night, as Danielle’s seedy, coke-whorin’ past as “Beverly” was revealed and she pissed off all the women by taking the cha-cha too seriously at a dance class. Danielle first addressed rumors that she was a husband stealer, telling Jacqueline and Teresa that the rumors were BS, but then jumping on them for even thinking that it might be true. Danielle has got a point — for all this talk of loyalty, no one seems to have Danielle’s back and I kind of feel bad for her. Or I would, if she wasn’t so damn shady. And if she hadn’t put her paws all over delicious Albie. Keep reading »
Improv Everywhere pulls all sorts of stunts around the country, and their latest was a surprise wedding reception. They grabbed a bride and groom who had just been married at New York City Hall and invited them to participate in a free impromptu reception, complete with wedding cake, bridesmaids, toasts, and dancing. Hey, it beats spending months quibbling over flower arrangements and table settings. [via Nerve] Keep reading »