A “Saved by the Bell” Porno? Eleven Other ’90s TV Skin Flicks We Bet Will Soon Be In The Works

Who cares about the “Saved By The Bell” reunion? Think “Saved by the Bell” sexual union instead. Yes, the folks at Hustler are hard at work on a porn parody of our friends at Bayside High: “This Ain’t Saved by the Bell XXX.” Noooo! I don’t want to see Mr. Belding call Jessie Spano (Elizabeth Berkley, pre-“Showgirls”) into the principal’s office for a spanking. Or Kelly Kapowski perform a strip routine on a pole at The Max, seductively removing her Keds and cutoff jean shorts. Or Screech getting shoved in his locker naked! Come to think of it, I bet they could get Dustin Diamond to participate after all. Point being: I’m so excited … I mean … I’m so scared! This was my childhood, dammit!

After the jump, more ’80s and ’90s television shows we have a feeling will soon go XXX. Keep reading »

The Fashion Trend That’s Got To Stop: Too Many Fashion Weeks

Oh. Dear. God. Today’s news from the fashion cosmos? It’s the beginning of Fashion Week—in Baltimore. I wish I were kidding. Just like we had a few ideas about how to make the New York shows better, I have a thought on all of these regional fashion weeks: Stop putting them on! Sure, I sort of see the reasons behind a Los Angeles Fashion Week (well, I do if Lauren Conrad and every celeb “designer” in the world isn’t invited to show), a Sao Paulo Week (hot Brazilians in swimsuits!) and, of course, the less-commercial London one (Temperley, Jonathan Saunders, Matthew Williamson are all headed back to their geographic roots next season), but, come on, Baltimore Fashion Week? Apparently, twenty-eight designers have signed up. The week’s schedule: eco-friendly apparel on Monday (today), ready-to-wear on Tuesday, punk/gothic/dark on Wednesday, avant-garde on Thursday, and couture on Friday. On the other hand, if I were a fashion-obsessed Maryland resident, I’d be really stoked. Are you sick of too many Fashion Weeks or do you wish there was one in your city? [Baltimore Fashion Week and The Examiner] Keep reading »

Sneak Peek: Anna Sheffield For Target

Another day, another Target collaboration. Here’s a first look at Anna Sheffield’s (of Bing Bang accessories fame) jewelry collection designed for the fashionable retail giant. In the mix: necklaces with vintage-inspired cameo pendants and insignia charms with Victorian touches like ribbon strands. The earrings recall Sheffield’s signature style with draped chains of mixed shapes and colors. The line is fairly affordable with a max price point of $79.99, although most pieces cost less than $40. You’ll have to wait until August 30 for the line to drop, but, after that, you’re sure to look bangin’.

Check out the other looks after the jump! [LuckyMag.com] Keep reading »

Remote Control: What You’ll Want to Watch The Week Of August 10th 2009

I live in a 400-square-foot apartment, yet my television is four feet wide. Hey, don’t judge me—you know you have a TV problem, too. Even though it’s gorgeous out, and you should probably be outside soaking up the vitamin D, here are the shows you’ll definitely want to catch this week. Things start off slow, but pick up thanks to Bravo and amazing new episodes of “NYC Prep” and “The Real Housewives of Atlanta.” By Friday, it’ll be a full-out boob-tube orgy with the premiere of “Degrassi Goes to Hollywood,” (FINALLY!) “Mad Men,” and “My Antonio.” Keep reading »

Crave: Blue Q Gum

What better way to say all the inappropriate things that you’re thinking than with gum and mints? We love the “Does this gum make my butt look big” gum almost as much as the “Wanna hook up?” gum. They’re a great way to break the ice … or build some up. [$1.25, Blue Q] Keep reading »

Is Lady Gaga A Hermaphrodite?

Lady Gaga allegedly revealed that she was born a hermaphrodite. Here’s what she supposedly said:

“It’s not something that I’m ashamed of, just isn’t something that I go around telling everyone. Yes. I have both male and female genitalia, but I consider myself a female. It’s just a little bit of a penis and really doesn’t interfere much with my life. The reason I haven’t talked about it is that it’s not a big deal to me. Like come on. It’s not like we all go around talking about our vags. I think this is a great opportunity to make other multiple gendered people feel more comfortable with their bodies. I’m sexy, I’m hot. I have both a poon and a peener. Big f*cking deal.”

Keep reading »

Over Unreliable “Long Lasting” Lipsticks? These Actually Work!

Long-term lipstick lovers rejoice! Estee Lauder has added two amazing lip products to its Double Wear Make Up collection: Double Wear Stay-In-Place Lipstick and Double Wear Stay-In-Place Lip Pencil. Yeah, the names could be shorter, but here’s what matters: These are two products that deliver what they promise — long lasting, super-smooth, conditioning color. How long, you ask? Twelve hours to be exact. The luxury beauty brand has formulated a patented technology that guarantees the color stays on through talking, eating, and the occasional smooching. Never one to take their word for it, we tried out a few sample products for ourselves, and, true to their pledge, the lipstick and pencil combo lasted as long as our day did. The lipstick comes in twelve shades; our faves are Stay Ginger, Stay Ruby and Stay Pinkberry, which are $22 each, and the pencil, $19, is available in 14 shades. Check out Apple Cordial and Plummy, which are perfect for fall. Find ‘em online or at Estee Lauder beauty counters nationwide. [Estee Lauder]

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“True Blood” Recap: Tara And Eggs Get Some Heart

The folks at HBO seem to outdo themselves with every “True Blood” episode and last night’s was no different. Basically, it was all about rescuing Sookie and Godric, who didn’t really need any assistance, from the Fellowship of the Sun people, and Maryann continued her domination over Tara and Eggs. Keep reading »

36 Words You Should Never Say In Bed

Last week, our Catherine totally skeeved all of us, which I might add is not an easy task, with 20 Words That Gross Us Out More Than “Moist.” Seriously, ew! It’s bad enough to hear a funky word in your day-to-day life, but what about when you’re trying to keep things sexy? You don’t want to say something icky when you’re naked. That’s why we’ve compiled a list of no-no words for once you’ve said “yes.” Let’s do it, down and dirty with 36 words you should never ever say … in bed!

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Are You Stuck On Your First Love?

When I think of my first love — a guy I was hot for all through college and finally hooked up with in my last semester of school — I feel mostly relief our affair was relatively brief (about 10 months). There were some sweet moments in our relationship (dancing to Nina Simone in my living room, brewing our first batch of plum beer together, camping under the stars), but certainly not enough to sustain a life together, like he wanted. Thankfully, I was smart enough at 22 to suggest taking things slowly when he thought we should run off to a mountaintop in Colorado and get married “right away.” In the 10 years since we broke up, I’ve dated lots, have had several serious boyfriends, and got married to a wonderful man. That old boyfriend has had little, if any, impact on my love life since I last spoke to him a decade ago. Apparently, however, moving on past my first love makes me a bit of a rarity. Keep reading »

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