Horror Stories: Dating Set Ups Gone Wrong!

When my grandma called me a few weeks ago to make me promise I’d go out with her friend’s grandson if he called me, I stupidly agreed. You see, my thinking was, What guy is really going to call some girl he doesn’t know because her grandma says she’s a catch? And even if he did defy my cynical expectations and call me, good old grandma told me a solid five times that he is just “so handsome, Lily, you have no idea. And witty, too!”

So when mystery man did, in fact, call a week later, I paused briefly before agreeing to lunch. I mean, if worse came to worst, at least I’d have something pretty to look at while contemplating ripping my arm off just for the excitement.

Never. Again.
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Have A Problem With Mustaches? Take It Up With The American Mustache Institute.

Every Sunday night, my girls and I go down to our local speakeasy bar and suck down cocktails prepared by our favorite bartender, Thomas. He’s a hot guy—tall with brown hair, blue eyes, a nice smile, ’30s style garb (complete with suspenders), and a big, fat, honking…mustache. This mustache has sparked a heated debate among the ladies. Half the group thinks it’s sexy; the other half wants to attack Thomas with a razor. ‘Stache style has ebbed and flowed over the years—there’s the crazy Salvador Dali waxed ‘stache of the ‘30s, the sexy ’70s ‘stache a la Burt Reynolds, and the ironic ‘stache of the last few years popularized by hipster boys. The question: Would you ever smooch a dude with a lip sweater? I say why the heck not, but apparently not everyone is so open-minded. Keep reading »

What’s In Your Bag?

Some say the eyes are the window to the soul, but when it comes to women, I’d argue that it’s what’s in her purse that offers the real clues as to who she really is. Every so often, we’d like to delve into the depths of one woman’s bag and look at what she can’t leave the house without. To get the ball rolling, today: the innermost secrets and pockets of my own handbag. I’ll show you mine if you show me yours: Send us a pic of your bag and all its contents and tell us why you love these products. Spy in my bag after the jump, if you dare… Keep reading »

For The Week Of July 6-12, 2009

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

When you are at your best, you know it. You feel it in your bones. Don’t deny you know this about yourself, just because some loser guy can’t get with your program. You can rationalize all you want, make excuses, but if he is not with you in the here and now, then you have to stop lying to yourself. Realize, once the lies stop, the truth and new hotness can come back in.

Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Being the team leader is not a role you prefer, but this week if you want your baby to start picking up the slack and stop treating you like you’re hired help, then you are going to have to kick some ass and make demands. Enough is enough and if you want to feel like the queen of your domain, you are going to have to get your serf to act accordingly.

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

You know you suffer from the “hearing what you want to hear” syndrome, but this week a vaccine is in sight and these interesting communications will reveal something quite mysterious, intense and real. Seems there is more than meets the eye with whoever this sly talker is and that no matter what is learned, a bigger curiosity is about to open in your mind.

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

The love for your boo is about to soar to new heights, but don’t forget you have a life too. While the attached at the hip look is cute and will give you a sense of security that you crave, know it won’t bode well if you start blowing off others to keep playing arm candy. Realize what makes you special is your independence, so exercise it for maximum happiness.

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Ultimatums are necessary if you want to see the life you want happen. Otherwise, waiting for someone to get on your page or seeing if what you think they are isn’t actually what they are will only postpone you from your destination. There is no time to waste, as time is crucial. Be willing to lay down the law or forever hold your peace.

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

If you want your future to brighten up, you have to let bygones be bygones. No matter how new the wounds may be, packing up the past in a box and sending it down the river is vital for your immediate future. Letting anything fester will only open up the emotional gashes bigger and more unnecessarily so. Take the power and make a clean break be your only option.

Pisces (February 19 – March 20)

Trying to be friends with an ex isn’t always the best option. Although you’d like to show you can be a bigger person, why? No one is judging you and you aren’t running to be the next Mother Theresa. Seriously, some people don’t deserve your time and if you couldn’t love them one way, realize you don’t have to love them at all.

Aries (March 21 – April 19)

This is going to be a busy work week and to get your kicks you might have to settle on more psychological ways of getting off. Be ready to test your skills at phone sex, virtual sex toys or whatever you may be open to that isn’t the traditional way of going feeding your desires. As it goes, this is the time to prove you can have it all.

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Break tradition and be the first to spill your guts. You know what you feel and waiting for validation isn’t going to change that. While you do like to hold onto your security blankets as long as you can, time to speed up your love life. With some of your turbo force love that has you taking control, you will lead the pack to beautiful places.

Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

You’ll have the whole world in your hand, how you want to stroke it is up to you. Seems you will have the charming element to make men submit to your will easily. However, your eyes will be bigger than your stamina, so use this power accordingly and sparingly, as where you direct your energies will set the pace for the rest of the month.

Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Love will be making you crazy, as it takes a hold of you and has you relentlessly plowing after that object of desire, as if your life depended on it. Hallelujah for the passion and determination, as this will bring you to a whole new level of psycho and has you proving to that right someone that you are a sucker for their love.

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

You can’t always get everything you want and this week it’ll be even more frustratingly so, as there will be two hot choices, but only one path you can take. You’ve juggled in the past and learned that no good can come from that behavior — despite how good it may sound in theory. This time around, guarantee yourself some real resolve and be mature by seizing your own fate.

Quick Pic: Adrian Grenier, Wet ‘N’ Wild

The “Entourage” star boogie boarded the 4th of July away. While we generally have a thing for surfers, we can get behind any sport that requires Adrian to take off his shirt. [Malibu, 6/4/09] Keep reading »

Style Icons, Remixed

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American Gothic IThere are some iconic images that we just can’t forget, and can’t seem to stop copying. Instead of throwing up one of the many illustrations for this icon we thought we’d grab its fashion alter ego. John Patrick’s 2009 collection makes it seem like the infamous “American Gothic” wasn’t such a fashion faux pas. Click on through and see more remakes…

Kathie Lee Shares Her Secrets To Domestic Success

Kathie Lee thinks she is “the perfect wife and mother.” What exactly does that entail? Well, thanks to our friends at Everything Is Terrible, we now know what that it means letting a camera crew tape you bench-pressing your baby. You gotta see it to believe it! Keep reading »

Do You Have Cankles? July Is Your Month

File this in the “we-make-you-feel-bad-about-yourself-so-you-spend-money” bin: Gold’s Gym has designated July as “Cankle Awareness Month.” (Not kidding. Next thing you know, they’ll be making up brutal poop-brown colored ribbons to stick on lapels to raise awareness! Ugh.) According to their Web site: “The word comes from the combination of ‘calf’ and ‘ankle.’ It occurs when the calf merges with an obese or swollen ankle.” Yeah, we got it. But what we don’t get is why Gold’s is claiming that cankles are the “fastest growing aesthetic affliction in the United States,” beating out the dreaded muffin top and saddle bags. Say wha? Last I checked, teeny, skinny people can get cankles too—it ain’t all about weight. And it ain’t all that huge a deal. This is one fitness ploy that isn’t going to see me buying a membership. [Say No To Cankles] Keep reading »

Gallery: These Shoes Weren’t Just Made For Walking

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Was Steve McNair’s Death A Murder-Suicide?

On July 4, former Titan’s quarterback Steve McNair was found dead in his Nashville apartment. The 36-year-old was shot at close range, twice in the head and twice in the chest. McNair’s secret mistress Sahel Kazemi, 20, was also there, fatally shot once in the head and laying on top of the gun that was used to kill them both. There were no signs of forced entry and are currently no suspects. [NY Post] Keep reading »

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