Yes, Britney—We Will Hold It Against You


So, yesterday, I felt a little giddy about the prospect of a new big budget, big choreography, big costume Britney Spears music video. Only instead of BritBrit dancing in the new dance track “Hold It Against Me,” we get lots of Britney just standing there and gesticulating with her arms while other people dance around her. Also, what’s up with all the product plugs in here? A close-up of her new perfume, Radiance—eww. A shot of a MakeUp Forever tub—really? Her logging on to PlentyOfFish.com—WTF?!?! Honestly, the only part of this video that doesn’t feel like a big ole disappointment is the quick scene where she fights herself. But maybe you disagree. What do you think of the video? Keep reading »

Would You Wear: A Sex Ring?

When Christina Aguilera‘s album Bionic dropped last April, it was impossible to miss the singer’s sudden interest in kink — her video for “Not Myself Tonight” featured whips, chains, a gimp mask, a ball gag, and drinking from a doggy bowl, among other things. Plus, there was that promotional photo featuring the singer wearing a thumb and index finger “petting ring” by Betony Vernon, which, while holding the fingers in the chi mudra position (for a concentrated, one-pointed mind), also aids in, uh, sexual play. There’s no doubt Xtina’s kinky ring cost an arm and a leg, but now you can get the look for a lot less. The question is, would you want too? Personally, I’m really into chunky, edgy jewelry — chains, mixed metals, harsh edges — so I think the sex ring is totally hot, albeit totally impractical. But would you wear it? [$30, Shock Boutique] Keep reading »

How 10 Stars Celebrated Their Big 3-0

30th paris hilton jpg
Paris Hilton turned 30 yesterday. And to celebrate her third decade on planet Earth, she threw herself the party to end all parties on Wednesday night. The fête had a Moulin Rouge theme, naturally. And because every species loves late 1800s French cabaret, there was also a petting zoo complete with a lynx, porcupine, squirrel monkey and a sloth. (Yes, a sloth.) Not only was there an aerial show, but also delicious absinthe beverages. And as a gift, boyfriend Cy Waits bought her a yellow Japanese Lexus LFA convertible—a $375,000 car. All this makes my 30th birthday party last year seem … kind of tame. [People, TMZ]

A lot of celebrities have thrown 30th birthday bashes recently—I guess it’s going around? After the jump, how more famous folks rang in their 30th year.

Quickies: Sarah Jessica Parker Hints At “Sex And The City 3″ & Slippers By Snooki?

  • Yes, “Sex and the City 3″ might actually be happening. Sarah Jessica Parker still believes Carrie and the gals have “one more story” to tell. [In which they die? Please? -- Editor] [Huffington Post]
  • Miley Cyrus slapped John Mayer’s butt at the Grammys, so obviously that means they’re schtupping. I don’t care if she’s 18 — if 30-something John is boning Miley, I’m calling Child Protective Services. [The Superficial]
  • In the throes of their messy custody battle, Halle Berry’s ex, Gabriel Aubrey, tried to prevent her from filming a movie in New York City, even though she offered to put him up in a hotel so he could see their daughter, Nahla. He sounds like such a royal pain. [TMZ]

Keep reading »

Today’s Lady News: Toronto Cop Says Don’t Dress Like A “Slut”

  • A cop speaking at Osgoode Hall Law School in Toronto suggested a woman could prevent sexual assault by not dressing like a “slut.” Also, men could prevent sexual assault by not sexually assaulting women. It’s that easy! [Excalibur]
  • Attention, men who like to “mansplain”: here are the things you can and can’t get away with saying about CBS reporter Lara Logan’s beating and sexual assault in Egypt last week. [Slate]
  • British model Claudia Aderotimi, who died recently from getting butt implants from a person unlicensed to perform plastic surgery, wanted to become a hip-hop video vixen. Claudia had silicone injected into her rear end at a Hampton Inn in Philadelphia, but the silicone poisoned her vascular system and she died shortly thereafter. [The Grio]
  • Oh good. South Dakota decided it’s not entirely reasonable to allow people to kill abortion providers as “justifiable homicide” for protecting the fetus. [New York Times]

Keep reading »

Baby Gorilla Learns To Walk


Is it weird that my uterus is totally spasming over this video of a baby gorilla — named Tiny! — taking its first steps at London’s Zoological Society? I mean, we’re both primates so it can’t be that weird that I wish I could give birth to a baby gorilla of my very own. It’s totally natural. Yup, uh huh. [The Gloss] Keep reading »

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