Whoa! Weird alarm bells are screeching in my head. Enema bag jewelry, oh yes, it exists. Luckily for our health, safety and noses, these pins and earrings are only inspired by the stinky enema bags. These, um, unique accessories are made from bronze, sterling silver and copper, so if you wear them and people run away from you, you can chase after them and tell them you are not a safety hazard. As far as artistic representation goes, I guess the jewelry is an accurate likeness to the medical device, eerily so, in fact. And yet, somehow I just don’t feel like sporting metal poop-bags on my lobes. I know butts are in right now, but they aren’t that in. If you bravely don enema bag jewelry you might discover that they are great conversation starters, or conversation killers. [$80, Luna Parc] Keep reading »
David Beckham’s new scorchingly hot Armani Exchange skivvies billboards are giving us a major lady boner. But being greedy little things, one hot guy in his underpants wasn’t enough for us, we want to see them all. There are a few, in particular, who would make awesome Beckham replacements…
Give comedians — give them 140 characters and they’ll find a joke that fits. This week in Tweet Beat, Michael Ian Black pretends he’s on “Sesame Street,” Sarah Silverman defends the emoticon, and Ellen saves a bird. Keep reading »
Because I’m young and carefree, I’ve been keeping my options open and dating a couple of guys at the same time. No more than two, because beyond that, things get a little sloppy. Well, two works until decision time comes around and you’re writing out each one’s pros versus cons. That’s where I am right now — paper-ready,with pen in hand.
Guy #1 is nice, funny and cute, but Guy #2 is gloriously attractive and kind of witty. Sort of. Sometimes. OK, barely. The choice seems clear: ditch the hot, boring guy in favor of the cute, funny one, right? Not so fast. I thought I had arrived at that conclusion, but still haven’t actually axed Guy #2. My conundrum, after the jump …
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A-cups, rejoice! Pop a piece of Bust Up Gum, which claims to increase bust size, and get the boobs of your dreams! And pigs can fly and Lindsay Lohan is going to get her act together. Sorry, this product sounds like the sort of thing only encountered on the Hogwarts Express. In the minor defense of the makers of Bust Up Gum, the creators at least went through the pretense of making a brilliant scientific discovery. They included fancy schmancy ingredients and all: Maltitol, Lactitol, Hydrogenated Glucose Syrup, and Pueraria. So, I guess this won’t work for you if you are into organic or that natural food business, but whatevs, you can’t have everything. Oh, but a a few notes of caution. The label recommends popping at least six tablets per day and also advises that you should not consume during pregnancy, breastfeeding, menstruation, or if you have been diagnosed with medical conditions of the ovaries, uterus, or breast. Oh, also, consuming in large amounts may cause loose bowels. That might be a problem for some. Keep reading »
I am a big fan of “alone time” and “space,” which is one of the many reasons I will not be buying a pair of Fundies underwear anytime soon. Some things in life were indeed built for two: See-saws, cats cradle, thumb war, patty cake, etc. Underwear, not so much. Perhaps I am just a square or closed-minded, but I am an only child and I was never good at sharing. From a style point of view, Fundies are not horrific. Boring, yes, but I am not going to avert my eyes in disgust. That being said, I don’t think Fundies were created or are bought for style reasons. Oh yes, this product is meant to live in kinky-ville. Not that Fundies look particularly sexy-time to me, but maybe that’s just because I am imagining the logistical difficulties of two people trying to get into these. I doubt the packaging says this, but it should contain a warning for the uncoordinated. All joking aside, I recommend buying these. Not only are they dirt cheap, but it’s always good to have a gag gift or two around the house. I also feel like promoting this classic if only because it has been around for decades and has had the same packaging for over 20 years. To survive so long in the ever changing fashion world, that earns my respect. [$9.99, Fundies, ShopInPrivate.com} Keep reading »
I remember shopping in Kids ‘R Us (well, not exactly shopping, it was more trailing behind Mom while she picked out clothes and held them up to my and my sister’s little bodies for an instant size comparison) and wondering what those signs were for their “Layaway Plan.” Once upon another desperate time, layaway programs rose to popularity during the Great Depression and became a common form of payment for people who couldn’t afford to pay the dolla-dolla bills for stuff upfront. Now, for obvious reasons, layaway is making a big-time comeback. Unlike credit cards, programs charge no interest and require no credit history, but customers can’t take their items home until they’ve paid in full. Most plans charge a small fee, usually around $5, and require customers to pay within a limited time period. Intrigued? Stores like TJ Maxx, Marshall’s, Kmart and Burlington Coat Factory are offering the option to pay-to-buy—your credit card will thank you.
And online layaway programs are even more rad—you can pay-until-you-get-it on iPods, LCD Sharp TVs, GE refrigerators, almost anything at elayaway.com. Keep reading »
Late Night TV has been going through some serious shake ups. Leno is officially dunzo and this month, Conan and Jimmy Fallon launched their new talk shows. So, now that we’ve had a chance to sample the goods, who do we really want to take to bed with us? Find out in this round of Shun, Shag or Marry!
Ok, first things first we have to narrow down the Late Night pool a bit. Although we’d normally love to shun any dude who hosted “The Man Show,” after watching Jimmy Kimmel whimper on “The View” after his recent break up from Sarah Silverman , we just can’t kick a man when he’s down. Carson Daly just had a kid, new dad’s also not fair game. And let’s not even go there with grumpy grandpa Dave Letterman. So, that leave us with: Conan O’Brien, Jimmy Fallon, and Craig Ferguson!
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