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Knowd: Simply Irresistible
Carla Bruni-Sarkozy is none too pleased that clothing maker Pardon is using a nude photo of her on a tote bag without her consent, and she’s seeking $167,000 in damages, which, if she wins her claim, would be donated to charity. The bag features a silk-screened version of a 1993 photograph taken during Bruni-Sarkozy’s modeling days. (A print of the photo sold for $91,000 in April.) A speech bubble coming out of the nude First Lady of France’s mouth reads, “My guy should have bought me Pardon!” Bruni-Sarkozy is protesting Pardon’s use of her image without her consent and for commercial gain, as the company sells the bags for around $4 and gives them to customers who make purchases in their stores. Keep reading »
Sure, it’s the season of twinkling lights, favorite classics on TV, batches of cookies, and pitchers full of eggnog, but it’s also the season of those dreaded soirees with people you’d like to never spend another evening with, wine-soaked or otherwise. Whether it’s an office party you’d love to get out of, an ex who insists on remaining “friends,” or a former neighbor’s yuletide bash, the Holiday Party Excuse Generator can compose the perfect note to send to the host, so you don’t have to endure another evening making small talk with satin-draped people who make your skin crawl. Check out this awesome note the generator composed for me, and give it a whirl yourself! Unless, of course, you’re one of those rare people who’s never met an invite you can’t turn down. [Holiday.enlighten.com] Keep reading »
Not long ago, I had a boyfriend. Now, I’m single. Again. I’d been feeling like my relationship wasn’t working for a while, but that hasn’t made the breakup any easier. I miss my ex, but even more, I miss the idea of us having a future together. At the same time, I’m getting into the idea of being single, and trying to embrace that rather than rushing to find someone to replace him. (There are few people I’ve had my eye on.) I’m reminded of “Single Girl” by Lush. It starts with “Single girl/who would want to be a single girl?” and ends with “I’m so happy I’m a single girl.” In the interest of focusing on the latter rather than the former, here are the top 10 reasons I’m happy to be single. Keep reading »
I have forever dated older men. Some by a year. Others by four years. Another by ten years. My theory came to be that ten years might be the ideal age difference. I felt five years older than my age, and men were usually about five maturity years younger than their actual age, so if I was 25, my ideal mate would be 35. We would meet at the figurative age of 30. It all made perfect mathematical sense. Keep reading »
Style icon Tom Ford gives the latest issue of Details his personal rules of style. As the man best known for resurrecting the Gucci brand and bringing back glam and whose latest turn is as a Hollywood movie director, Ford knows a thing or two about cultivating personal style. While he gears this set of tips towards the fashionably-minded male population, many of his suggestions would be well-heeded by fashionistas, as well: being a good listener is sexy, dress yourself intuitively, and Botox can be a blessing. Of course, it wouldn’t be Ford if he didn’t offer up something totally outrageous. In his final tip on the list, he advises: “There’s one indulgence every man should try in his lifetime: If you’re straight, sleep with a man at least once, and if you’re gay, don’t go through life without sleeping with a woman.” He adds: “In the end, it’s just another person that you are relating to in a physical way.” Oh, Tom. You’ll always be our number one HILF. So do you think Tom’s last tip should apply to women, too? Should a straight women sleep with a woman at least once in her lifetime, and should a lesbian sleep with a man at least once in her lifetime? [The Cut] Keep reading »
We’re happy that Britney Spears seems to be on the road to recovery, and that her new album is doing well and holds the number one spot on the Billboard 200. So, hooray for Britney! Too bad we like Lily Allen’s ragtime-y version of “Womanizer” better. Check it out after the jump. [Stereogum] Keep reading »
Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
You’re under no obligation to do anything you don’t want to. After all, why fight the selfish, lazy, and irritable mood that’s how you honestly feel? Bah humbug all the way, but you’re not the only one feeling the slump. When it comes to connecting over misery, you’ll find complaining is an effective and joyous method of foreplay.
Libra (September 23 – October 22)
Bitching will get you heard, and the louder the better. No more sitting on the sidelines, trying to play perfect in your partnership, as that isn’t going to make you happy at the end of the day. This isn’t to say your honey isn’t out to please, but when you don’t say a thing, how will he ever know what to do? He may be cute, but smart? Not always.
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
You’ll finally hear words you want to hear, but where that’ll lead won’t be what you’d assume. It seems a new can of worms will open, leading you down another dramatic path that has more questions than answers. At least the power to decide your fate is back in your hands, and that’s as good as you can ask for at this point.
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
The bottom line on your current prospect is if you’re not feeling the love by this week, call it quits, as you’ll never get to that level of intimacy you crave. Yes, your optimist is getting the better of you, and to think your latest deeper than he is would only be wasting your imagination. Better to spend your time in bed catching up on sleep.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)
If your baby can’t get with your current program, then it’s time to listen to those voices in your head and reconsider past compromises you’ve made as a favor to him. Time to see the bigger picture and realize you’ve been getting the shorter end of the stick. Llike any red-blooded lady, if you’re going to be stuck with any side of the a stick, you need it big. Don’t settle.
Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)
When it comes to friends, it makes life a lot easier when they’re enablers. This week, when life brings a new batch of weirdos to court you, feel free to call in the peanut gallery to get their assessments. Chances are they’ll find just the right way to paint a fun and enticing picture. After all, if your love life can’t be rewarding, it should at least be entertaining.
Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
New loves are not your old ones. Sure, the past matters in building your future, but when you short-circuit and hold someone new accountable for past sins of a prior relationship, that’s called head-tripping. Resolve your issues before getting in too deep with another. The emotional luggage you’re carrying is a cross too heavy to bear for you and any other trying to get near.
Aries (March 21 – April 19)
Your idealism will be percolating with all sorts of grand visions of your holidays, which can be a source of great inspiration or damnation, depending on the expectations you place on those around you. However, chances improve if you use your expansive imagination, as it seems those around you won’t be on par with your agenda.
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
Midweek, there’ll be a blip of something that could be remotely romantic in your life, but otherwise this isn’t the perfect moment for love. Surprisingly enough, you won’t care, as you’ll be far too consumed with work and trying to get all those errands done on time to be free enough to enjoy getting properly sloshed and sexed during the holidays.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
Secrets are going to pour out, and skeletons in closets that you didn’t think you had will blindside you. Thankfully, this will come just in time to show you that your latest catch isn’t as dull as you had assumed and actually has some edge. Now, with gossip and drama back at your disposable, you’ll be feeling in your element once again.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
Finally, you’ll feel as if the universe has some sympathy for you, as that contentious side of your honey will subside and be willing to call a truce long enough to discuss compromise. However, just because he’s talking the right words, until he backs it up with action, don’t sigh that breath of relief quite yet.
Leo (July 23 – August 22)
People can badger you all they want and you can ignore them — but when your boo starts throwing his two cents in on the way you should be living, that’s when you have to break out the diva speeches and tell him to stop projecting his crap onto you. While there might be some truth in his accusations, there are other, less rude ways to nag, without killing your holiday buzz.
Forget self-help books and magazine columns. For dating and relationship advice, I recommend Craigslist. Don’t believe me? Yesterday, I was perusing the New York City section of the site, hoping someone might be unloading a pair of Veronica slouch Frye boots in a size 7, preferably barely used, and hopefully well under the $328 they retail for, when I came across the following ad. The subject header: “Mens clothes, My ex’s xmas gifts he’ll never get, It’s a steal.”
This is a scream. Zach Galifianakis, who is as funny as he is hirsute, interviews “Mad Men”‘s Jon Hamm, who is my future husband, on “Between Two Ferns with Zach Galifianakis” on Funny or Die. The results are dead-pan hilarious. My favorite part is when Galifianakis asks Hamm if his middle name is Honey-baked, and if he’s ever thought about changing his last name to Sausage. I nominate this one for funniest online video of 2008. [Buzzfeed] Keep reading »