“Here’s the good news — my goddesses have already f**king approved [Mila Kunis]. She’s pre-approved! I would have great tolerance for many missing items provided it involves Mila f**king Kunis: If Mila Kunis is stealing your s**t , trust me, you’re still f**king winning, you’re still winning at that moment … I’m going to go on her Facebook page and discover her likes. I’m going to buy them all and then she can come steal them. A super f**king hot thief named Mila Kunis. Mila, please, we we have a warehouse full of your favorite s**t to steal.”
– Charlie Sheen announced who he’d like to be third goddess to join his harem and the lucky lady is “Black Swan” actress Mila (f**king) Kunis. An unexpectedly talented and classy choice, I must say. I’m sure Mila is so flattered. I’ll bet you anything, right now, she’s packing her bags — but leaving behind her dignity — and calling a cab to take her right on over to the Sober Valley Lodge. Yep. Charlie should probably expect the doorbell to ring in 30 minutes, give or take, depending on LA traffic. (This is the “bitch, please” look I imagine Mila will give upon hearing this news, BTW.) [Huffington Post] Keep reading »
I’m 25, going on 26, and I am very proud to call myself a feminist. I think the standard of beauty in this country is bulls**t. I like to question authority and talk about the meaning of life and also I’m really stressed out about fine lines that are starting to show up around my eyes…
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Let’s cut to the chase — you’re welcome. This here is a GIF made from the just-released trailer for Ryan Gosling‘s next film, “Crazy Stupid Love,” also starring Steve Carell, Julianne Moore, Emma Stone, and Marisa Tomei. Gosling plays a hunky ladies’ man (duh) who helps a nerdy man (Carell) — recently split from his wife (Moore) — get his mojo back. But, of course, despite being gloriously good-looking and suave, his own tricks aren’t working on the one woman (Stone) he wants. And at some point he gets naked and, no, I am not bothered in the slightest. Check out the trailer after the jump! Oh, and Buzzfeed has more amazing Gosling GIFs for your spank bank. Keep reading »
According to Star magazine, Brad Pitt has been caught in a “nude scandal” with his 23-year-old “Cogan’s Trade” co-star, Bella Heathcote. Allegedly, he was caught undressing the “Angelina-look-a-like” in his trailer by none other than Angelina herself. GASP! Initially, I thought she may be the seventh child Brangelina was adopting (hence the tattoo), but Us Weekly reports that Brad and Bella haven’t even met yet. They are both in the film, but haven’t shot any scenes together. The Aussie actress mentioned that she saw Brad half-naked in “Troy” and thought he was hot and hopes to play his love interest someday. If that’s a “nude scandal,” then I have been involved in many with Johnny Depp. Good work, Star. [Celebitchy] Keep reading »
My editor, a fashion-forward cyborg with champagne instead of blood, asked me to write about the sexual activity “pegging,” to which I responded that I’m open-minded and fine with two consenting adults dressing up like pirates behind closed doors.
But that’s not what “pegging” means. Keep reading »
When it comes to drinking, we’re classy broads. That’s why we’d be more than psyched to sip a glass of Malbec out of Oenophilia Porto’s chic sippy wine goblets. The little feet make them harder to tip over and the straw looks like a tail! Sure, when drunk we may mistake our glass of vino for a headless rodent or a sperm, but at least we won’t be staining our teeth or smudging our lipstick in the process.