Mother’s Day Gift Guide For Lucille Bluth-Types

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Some of us were lucky enough to grow up with a mom like Donna Reed or Carole Brady, a mom who was always on standby with a PBJ sandwich, a Band-Aid or some motherly words of wisdoms.

The rest of us … well, our moms our more like Lucille Bluth from “Arrested Development.” A hard-drinking and narcissistic mama like Lucille is always on-hand with a strong martini and a muscle relaxant, usually taken in tandem.

Moms like Lucille may be the reason you — and the Bluth clan — are in therapy three days a week. But dammit, she’s a mother, too, and that means you need to get her something for Mother’s Day. Because if you don’t, you know you’ll be hearing about it.

This Kissing Device Doesn’t Do It For Me

I don’t care if it feels like kissing. I have no desire to put a motorized straw in my mouth and pretend like it’s a human mouth. This kiss transmission device, which uses computers to simulate the way a person kisses down to their taste, breathing, and moistness of the tongue, is very ingenious, but very unnecessary in my opinion. Kissing is one of the few simple pleasures in life. It is perfect just as it is. I say, if it ain’t broke, don’t digitize it. How about you? Would you kiss this thing? [Buzzfeed] Keep reading »

The 15 Most WTF Looks At The 2011 MET Ball

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No, seriously, WTF were these MET Ball 2011 attendees thinking? I think I know…

The Love Guru: Now I Know What “The Bachelorette” Feels Like

I walked into the restaurant and spotted Old Flame sitting at the bar sipping a beer. He looked better than I remembered and when I hugged him I felt a stirring in my nether regions.

Near the end of a dinner filled with laughter, Old Flame’s hazel eyes turned serious. He reached across the table and gave me an unexpected kiss on the lips. It was soft and sweet. No tongue. Keep reading »

Who Is Pippa Middleton’s Boyfriend, Alex Loudon?

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Over one short weekend, the world became captivated with Pippa Middleton: the dress, the smile, the derriére. And though lots of people seem to think it’s not weird to suggest Pippa and Prince Harry get together, the reality is that Her Royal Hotness already has a boyfriend and apparently might soon be walking down the aisle on her own. (It won’t be Westminster Abbey, though.) The lucky guy is a hot piece of ass and former cricket star named Alex Loudon. Keep reading »

The 15 Worst Looks At The 2011 MET Ball

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The Met Costume Institute Ball brought out a lot of great gowns, but lo, did it bring out some dreckitude, too. After the jump, we go through some of the absolute worst of the worst.
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