Cast Of “Orange Is The New Black” Puts A Litchfield Spin On “The 12 Days Of Christmas”

Happy Holidays From Litchfield!

Though we won’t be getting new episodes of “Orange is the New Black” until the middle of next year, the cast has returned for a bit to wish everyone a Happy Holiday, with this Litchfield Prison-centric version of “The 12 Days of Christmas.”

Almost all of the cast participates–except, tragically, Norma the mute lady. Which is sad, because in real life, actress Annie Golden is an awesome singer who had a brief career as an 80s pop star, and a much longer career as a Broadway actress. In fact, she even originated the role of Squeaky Fromme in Sondheim’s “Assassins!” Maybe they were all just worried she’d steal the show again, like she did in the Christmas pageant in Season One. [Buzzfeed]

Village Wants HIV-Positive 8-Year-Old Kicked Out

Village Wants HIV-Positive 8-Year-Old Kicked Out

The stigma of having HIV is alive and well in a small Chinese village: Its residents want to banish 8-year-old “Kun Kun” (a fake name being used to protect his identity) for his illness, UPI reports. At least 200 Xichong locals, including the boy’s own grandfather, signed a petition on Dec. 7 to get “Kun Kun away from the village, and protect the health of the villagers and children,” the BBC reports. Read more on Newser…

Stephen Collins Claims He’s “Not A Pedophile”

  • Child molester and former “7th Heaven” star Stephen Collins told Katie Couric he is “not a pedophile” because “a pedophile is someone who is mainly or wholly attracted to children. I’m not. I had a distortion in my thinking where I acted out in those ways. But I’m absolutely not attracted, physically or sexually attracted to children. I’m just not…I think I’m someone who gave in, several times, to exhibitonistic urges. Someone who had big boundary issues as a young man and beyond that…to an extent.” Say what you want, Stephen, but you’re still a child molester. [Gawker]
  • Yet another victim has come forward accusing Bill Cosby of sexual assault. She told Dr. Phil that Cosby allegedly drugged her so heavily that she blacked out for two days. Awful, awful, awful. [Death + Taxes] Keep reading »

Did Vaccines Give YOUR Child The Gay? Morons Investigate!

Are you concerned that measles, mumps and rubella aren’t the only things your child is being vaccinated against? Could the same shot that immunizes your daughter against deadly viruses also be immunizing her against the dick? Could that shot in the butt you got as a kid cause you to crave even more shots in the butt as an adult? These are just a few of the “legitimate” questions you might ask yourself if you are a complete and total idiot, or if you are the person operating the VacTruth.com Facebook page. Keep reading »

Admit It, At Some Point You’ve Been Tempted To Start An Airplane Brawl Like This One

Airplane Brawl

I kid, but this is actually terrible: yesterday, a brawl broke out between three women on an Air China flight from Chongqing to Hong Kong over a crying baby. Two women were woken up mid-flight by crying, so they confronted the baby’s mom, a 27-year-old woman named Chan Juan Sung. I’m going to take a wild guess and imagine that when you’re a frazzled parent whose kid is screaming in an enclosed space, the last thing you need is to be told that your child is screaming loudly. Sung was already acutely aware of that fact. When the confrontation resolved little, the two women passive-aggressively reclined their seats as far back as they’d go, because they are mature grown-ups. Before anyone could register what was happening, things got physical, with one woman hitting her head on an overhead bin.

Keep reading »

2014: The Year In Jenna Marbles Being Weird

Jenna Marbles is one of my greatest pleasures. My thoughts on Jenna Marbles are almost unequivocally positive. I started watching her channel when she posted “Some Idiot/How Sports Bras Work” about Yuksul Aytug’s truly idiotic comments about female Olympians and have watched every single main-channel video since then. Jenna Marbles is basically the highlight of my mid-week.

And I get that she says stuff that doesn’t seem particularly enlightened to leftists and feminists and people who are invested in social justice. She got reamed after making a video called “Things I Don’t Understand About Sluts,” and I totally agree with the objections to that video, but I don’t know. At the same time, I find it tremendously condescending when the feminist movement (as much as that’s a thing) singles out a woman for “internalized misogyny” and decides to tell her what she should be thinking, if she would just enlighten herself and get on their level. The same thing happened this week with Beyoncé’s 2014 retrospective video “Yours and Mine,” because she said that men and women balance each other out, and defined herself as a feminist and humanist in a way that many feminists and humanists believe is naïve (at best, and ignorant at worst). It’s a demand for female public figures to be perfect feminists — as majority feminism would have them be — straight out of the gate, and it gives no slack, leaves no room for growth, and turns women who are powerful, outspoken, self-possessed, and confident away from feminism. Just look at Amanda Palmer, who just last month decried a “radical, violent brand of feminism” that, let’s be honest, a lot of feminists who consider themselves (OK, ourselves) “moderate” have engaged in, in some capacity. Keep reading »

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