Why We Love It: Tub time is always better when you can get off, am I right? This totally waterproof silicone vibrator has a suction cup base that will mount to any flat surface, making underwater masturbation your new best friend. Just try not to turn into a prune… [$89.95, The Pleasure Chest] Keep reading »
“I vomit a good dozen times a day. It’s, like, bad. I vomited before coming out here and I had a peppermint so you didn’t [know]. I’m not even kidding, it’s so bad. It’s so bad. I know it’s like so gross. And that’s the thing, too — you’re not attractive when you’re pregnant. Everybody tells you [that] you glow and you’re hair is pretty and you’re nails are pretty. That’s total crap. My nails are short, my hair still falls out like it’s not all lush and beautiful and I have no glow. Unless it’s, like, something left over from a bad throw up. It’s horrible.”
Newly pregnant Kelly Clarkson (11 weeks!) tossed her cookies backstage on Ellen DeGeneres’ talk show. I pity the lowly PA who had to clean that one up. And by the way, totally disagree she’s “not attractive” while pregnant! [Celebuzz] [Photo: Pacific Coast News]
The tongue! The tongue! It’s so tiny, but it’s perfect. The sugar glider manages to makes it seem far more wholesome than Miley. [Reddit]
Is there a word in the English language to describe when advertising is so delightful you don’t even mind that it’s advertising? Because that’s the word I need for this Poopy Cat commercial, a Dutch subscription service for disposable cat litter boxes. (Um, brilliant, if environmentally unfriendly, idea, right?) Introducing the Poopy Cat Dolls, a sassy group of singing pussycats that put Nicole Scherzinger to shame. The Poopy Cat Dolls should sing in all kitty litter commercials, and cat food commercials, and heck, just replace the Pussycat Dolls entirely. Rrrrow! [Laughing Squid]
Ladies and gentleman, may I introduce you to the Santa Claus 2nd Skin Suit. He delivers packages instead of presents. Now available for purchase anywhere costumes are sold. Not appropriate to be worn around children. [Laughing Squid]
On last night’s episode of “Watch What Happens Live,” during the segment in which Andy Cohen’s celeb guest demonstrates their special talent, Whoopi Goldberg showed Andy and actress Zoe Saldana how to roll a joint. You know, of oregano. Or tobacco. Pick your poison! Anyway, Whoopi was probably feeling the pressure of a time limit because her doobie broke midway through. Rolling a tight, fat joint means taking your time, man. A producer signaling to go to commercial would totally harsh my mellow too.
When his wife gave him an ultimatum to choose between her or his 2006 Harley-Davidson XL1200L Sportster, Bob White of Virginia decided to put both of them up for sale on Craigslist! The listing price for the hog/wife package deal (both in “excellent condition,” Santa hat not included) is $5,900 OBO, but he will consider trades. You can check out an an excerpt from the ad featuring deets on both models after the jump. Oh, and you can call or text Bob to test drive the motorcycle, but not the wife, if you’re interested. GUH. Warning: prepare to be offended.
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