Star Couplings: Reese Witherspoon Sports A Subtle Bloat Baby

  • Reese Witherspoon’s stomach doesn’t look insaney concave in this photo, therefore she must be pregnant. [Splash News]
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    Romance On TV: The Bachelor’s Women Tell All

    Let me assure you, 99.9% of the reason I watch The Bachelor is for the pre-season finale episode, “The Women Tell All”. Undoubtedly, the batsh*t crazy ones have already been sent packing and make the return on this most glorious of episodes, and this season was no exception. Stacy was back! But she wasn’t as proud of her moments of glory as we thought she should be — you mean, she was actually sorry for saying she would kill all the other bachelorettes AND their families to get to Matt? You mean she understands giving The Bach her panties wasn’t a good idea? Boring! My favorite part of the show was the montage of Marshanna. I forgot she showed up the first day in a sari. Bitch was awesome. Keep reading »

    Dina Lohan To Be Honored As A Mother Of The Year

    A mommy website is honoring Dina Lohan as one of its mothers of the year — not because she’s done a good job as a parent to her children, but because she’s from Long Island! “We’re just honoring celebrity moms on Long Island,” a spokesperson for MinglingMoms.com said. “It’s something for Mother’s Day. It’s a list of mothers from Long Island who have raised superstar children.” Other mothers being honored are Carol Baldwin (mother to the Baldwin brothers), Billy Joel’s mom, Natalie Portman’s mom, Mariah Carey’s mom, and Jennifer Lopez (who gave birth to her twins in L.I.). This is the dumbest award ever. [WENN] Keep reading »

    What’s Your Nationality In The Bedroom?

    The Daily Bedpost alerted us to a fun new quiz to waste the last part of our day on: Are You British In Bed? sponsored by KY. After answering a series of questions posed by a funny, fat British lady behind the desk at customs, I’ve discovered I’m 85% Taiwanese in bed, which apparently means I’m selfless. Catherine is wild and unpredictable, therefore she is Congolese — how do they figure? Anyway, there are some massage tips tailored to your nationality, but it’s unclear to me as to whether these tips are for when you’re GETTING massaged or when you’re giving someone else a rub down. Hopefully the former, because I do not give massages. Which is weird. I thought I was a selfless lover? [Are You British In Bed? via Daily Bedpost] Keep reading »

    Rich Men Don’t Like Sequins Or Fake Tans

    Russia ranks second (behind the U.S.) in wealthy bachelors, which makes sense, because the country has 110 billionaires and 130,000 millionaires. Hoping to cash in by selling women guides on how to marry rich, a bunch of authors have written books on the subject.

    In the book Marry A Millionaire, socialite authors Oksana Robski and Ksenia Sobchack warn against wearing jeans with sequins, D&G leopard-print tops, fake tans, dark glasses at night, and high-heeled boots. “Without a doubt, this is the battle gear of the Ukrainian prostitute,” they write. Crap. I had planned to wear that exact outfit on my next date. I am completely baffled as to what I should wear. Maybe a Roberto Cavalli animal-print dress? [Sydney Morning Herald] Keep reading »

    Bound & Bothered

    Who gets on your nerves? If you said your spouse, you agree with most married people. (If you are single, like myself, let’s take this moment to laugh at the little things that annoy us since we aren’t contractually obligated to them for life.) According to a study conducted by the Institute for Social Research at the University of Michigan, the longer a couple is married, the more things they find annoying about each other. Aw, isn’t love grand? While couples in their 20’s and 30’s may be vocal and try to work things out, 40-plus people just seem to give up and get along. This behavior begs the question: does keeping quiet make things better or worse? Either way, you’re bound to be bothered by your ball and chain. [Afroromance] Keep reading »

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