Either GOP presidential contender Ron Paul was wearing eyebrow toupees during the GOP debate on Tuesday night, or the brown caterpillar nesting atop his eyebrows decided to go for a walk at a rather inopportune moment. Those are the only two possibilities I can think of to explain why Mr. Paul’s right eyebrow seemed to fall off his face onstage. The New York Times, always atop pressing political matters, called the Paul campaign spokesman, who huffed that the inquiry was “stupid” or “insulting.” Instead, the spokesman blamed “allergies” on the Dartmouth campus where the debate was held. The poor spokesman was just doing his job, but I am filing that baloney under Vanity-Related Excuses About As Plausible As Bristol Palin’s Plastic Surgery Splurge Being For “Medical Reasons.”
[New York Times]
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Chelsea Handler and Gloria Steinem have been hanging out and I’m never invited. It’s cool. I’m not, like, devastated or anything. But I’m just saying, if Arianna Huffington walked up to Chelsea at a Forbes 100 Most Powerful Women event and lectured her how she’s “so maternal” and “needs” to have children, I would have had Chelsea’s back, too. Chelsea and Gloria and I can be “CGJ,” — sort of like “MVP” but feminist and smart and awesome. [E! Online] Keep reading »
We all felt a special bond with our childhood dogs … well those of us that had them. My apologies to those who didn’t. When I was a kid, I considered my Bichon Frise Mandy my best friend. I don’t know if that’s sweet or sad. Probably sad. Anyhow, I used to have long conversations with her, I even wrote an original song for her called “Yummy Yummy.” Sometimes we would fight. She wouldn’t lick my face for an entire day when I got a stuffed dog and started sleeping with it. I literally had to take the stuffed animal out of my room before she’d pay attention to me again. Good ol’, Mandy. We just got each other.
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Pregnancy is a miracle unto itself. So when you hear about a woman claiming to have gotten pregnant from a character in a 3-D porno film, you can’t help but have your mind blown. Is this the immaculate conception of the 21st Century or the world’s most creative excuse for cheating? You decide. Click through to see more of the craziest pregnancy stories. Some real, some not, all insane. [Buzzfeed]