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Last Night’s Webby Award Acceptance Speeches Were All 5 Words or Less

Last night, techies from all corners of the World Wide Web gathered at Cipriani Wall Street in New York City for the 13th annual Webby Awards. The Webby Awards are like the Oscars of the Internet, honoring websites, advertisers, videos, and films in more than 70 categories. While the interwebs are pretty cool and all, what makes the Webby Awards super special is that winners are limited to acceptance speeches of five words or less, making them like truncated haikus. After the jump, our favorite five word speeches from last night. Keep reading »

Cell Phone Elbow, And Four Other New-Fangled Ailments That Could Get You A Day Off Work

Last week, doctors discovered a debilitating ailment—Cell Phone Elbow. This injury rears its ugly head when your ulnar nerve, on the inside of your elbow, gets compressed, which happens if you bend your arm too much, either by holding a cell phone to your ear or leaning on your arm while typing at work. Sure, it may be apt punishment for people who yack on their phones allll day long. But it can be super painful, and even make typing or writing difficult. [CBS]

This got me thinking—you know those days when you just don’t feel like going to work because your bed is warm, it’s raining outside, the boyfriend is over, etc? “I have Cell Phone Elbow,” would sound so much better than my stale go-to excuse, “I have food poisoning.” Here are four other tech-related excuses that’ll come in just as handy. Keep reading »

Can A Homemaker Be A Feminist?

I was raised by a working, single mother. She went to Stanford, majored in economics, became a public school teacher, wrote a book, and now works as a journalist. She didn’t give up her job when she had my sister or me, and she certainly didn’t give it up after she and my father divorced. I consider her the ultimate feminist — she’s worked her butt off, made a living on her own, and raised two perfect daughters (just kidding). She’s my hero. But if she had quit her job when I was born, retiring at age 31, would she still be my #1 role model? It’s hard to say.
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The Woman Behind Spike TV

When I think of the executive board room at Spike TV, the Viacom owned men’s cable network whose meathead-ish slogan is, “Get more action,” I envision a bunch of dudes sitting around, drinking beers, scratching their crotches, and brainstorming ideas about new programming featuring boobs and stuff. But perhaps I’ve been too judgmental? Enter Sharon Levy, the head of development for Spike’s reality programming, who is destroying the channel’s stereotypical Maxim-esque rep by coming up with un-vaginal programming that appeals to Spike’s male demographic while beckoning women to come check it out, too. (“Grey’s Anatomy?” she tells the New York Times. “Kill me now.”) Sharon, who got her start developing dude faves like “South Park” and “The Man Show” for Comedy Central is the kind of chick who enjoys talking about “Wolverine,” “Star Trek,” and her favorite video games while simultaneously telling you how awesome her new handbag is. She is particularly proud of her limited edition Takashi Murakami/Louis Vuitton. Keep reading »

Quick Vid: “Sex With Ducks” Video Responds To Gay Marriage Remark

Televangelist Pat Robertson has said some pretty ridonkulous things. But recently, he topped even himself when, during a conversation about a bill protecting gay folks from hate crimes, he said it’s a slippery slope towards protecting “someone who likes to have sex with ducks.” When they heard this quote, Riki Lindhome and Kate Micucci, who make up the group Garfunkel and Oates, made this hilarious pro-gay marriage music video, appropriately titled “Sex with Ducks,” celebrating the hypothetical freedom to “quack that swan.” So “put your beak in mine” and watch. Keep reading »

Tokyo Couples Can Rent Guests For Their Wedding

While most couples are trying to lessen the expense of their wedding during these tough economic times, couples in Japan actually rent extra family members, friends, and coworkers. In Japan, a wedding is seen as a formal event, so it must be attended by as many people as possible. Bosses usually give speeches and colleagues or friends perform at the party. But if a cousin, boss, or some other guest can’t attend, the bride or groom can hire a staff member of Office Agents for 20,000 yen ($200) to come in their place. “Suddenly, a guest might not be able to make it. Or maybe you are concerned about the gap in the number of guests you have compared to your partner. Or, there are many temp workers these days and they may be uncomfortable inviting the boss,” said Hiroshi Mizutani, who heads Office Agents, to Reuters. At one wedding, each of the groom’s 30 guests were fake friends and family. But this firm doesn’t just rent wedding guests. They also specialize in fake funeral attendees, secretaries for those that want to seem more important, and even lovers to introduce to the family. Keep reading »

Zack Morris Appeared On “Late Night With Jimmy Fallon”?!

We didn’t realize how much we missed Zack Morris and “Saved By the Bell” until Mark-Paul Gosselar reprised his famous role on “Late Night with Jimmy Fallon.” Keep reading »

Home Laser Gun To Destroy Wrinkles Or The Planet?

If there were ever two words that shouldn’t go together in a sentence, it’s home and laser. But Johnson & Johnson and their hair removal medical supply partners, Palomar, are teaming up to turn out home laser wrinkle treatments for consumers. The FDA has just approved their skin-smoothing machine, but it sounds more like a plot for world domination. While the companies are keeping the product info plans top secret, and they won’t describe the device or even the release date, they do admit the price will be high.

Each ray gun wrinkle remover is going to cost hundreds of dollars, but the equipment won’t require that hard-to-get dermatological appointment or even a prescription. That’s right, let’s just put lasers right into people’s hands! With the popularity of the Snuggie proving that millions of Americans can’t work a simple blanket, is this head zapper really a safe idea? Well, we bet it would at least make an awesome sci-fi movie plot. [Boston Globe] Keep reading »

James Bond Was One Gentleman Who Preferred Brunettes

Britain’s most famous secret service agent doesn’t prefer blondes. James Bond is way more likely to bed a brunette, according to a group of researchers who set out to determine what traits 007 liked in his women. The researchers assessed the physical traits of 195 female actresses who had spoken or appeared in two or more scenes in each film from “Dr. No” (1962) to “Die Another Day” (2002)—20 films in total. The team contrasted the characteristics of the 98 Bond Girls who ended up in the spy’s arms with the 97 female characters that weren’t so lucky. “Every Bond film has multiple female characters who variously tempt, distract, and assist James in his latest mission,” said team leader Kimberly Neuendorf, a professor at Cleveland University. “At least one ‘Bond girl’ is particularly striking—a woman with an adventurous nature, cunning attributes, strong potential for romantic entanglement with Bond, and a sense of self-assurance, whose name—Pussy Galore, Honey Ryder, or Holly Goodhead, for example—is as provocative as the character she portrays.” Check out the researchers’ unexpected findings after the jump. Keep reading »

Magazine Aims To Sex Up The Bible

Be honest, when was the last time you cracked open a Bible? I read it for the first time in college and only because my professor made me. But peeps from a publishing company called Illuminated World want to make God’s diary more…enticing to the unsaved. These publishers have created Bible Illuminated: The Book. This glossy, magazine-style book (which retails for $35) has given the Bible a major facelift. With big photographs and pop culture references galore, this sexy page turner is meant to appeal to more than just religious folk. Recognizable characters have been replaced with celebs like Angelina Jolie, Bono, and Muhammed Ali and concepts like pain and suffering are illustrated by recent photos of sickness in Africa instead of Jesus on a cross. What do you think? Is turning the Bible into a glossy magazine blasphemy or brilliant? [Bible Illuminated] Keep reading »

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