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Do Not Put That In Your Butt

A deeply inebriated Romanian man put two hammerheads up his butt to alleviate a case of constipation. Guess what? It didn’t work. In this helpful x-ray, one can see that Viorel Firoiu’s attempt to play home medic wasn’t meant to be in a good way, and he appeared at a hospital in Orlea, Romania, complaining of stomach pains. According to Firoiu’s story, he ate some cherries, got to feeling blocked, had a few drinks to make himself feel better, and then came up with the brilliant idea that the whole problem could be solved with a pair of hammers. (NB: Do not try this at home.) Supposedly, he tried rectifying (heh) the rectal matter with one hammerhead. It got stuck. So, he tried another. And the rest? Well, now it’s tabloid fodder. Surgeons removed the offending articles. If you want to learn more about strange things people have stuck up their bums over the years, go here. [The Sun via Gorilla Mask] Keep reading »

Are We Heading For A Size War?

Really, people? We’re still talking about Surgeon General Regina Benjamin’s weight? This week, Michael Karolchyk, the owner of a gym, appeared on FOX News to voice his opinion about why Benjamin has no right being considered for Surgeon General. Luckily, Neil Cavuto took him to task, but Karolchyk still got in zingers like, “Just because you eat a lot of dinner rolls doesn’t make you a role model.” Oh, and did I mention that during this whole appearance, he wore a shirt that read, “No Chubbies?” How cute! And when I say “cute,” I mean, “Can I punch this guy in the face?”

This whole Benjamin debate has got me thinking—are we heading towards a size war? Is this the 2009 version of the gender, class, race, or sexual orientation wars? Keep reading »

Quickies!: Bar Rafaeli Is The New Face Of Rampage

  • Bar Rafaeli will take over Gisele Bundchen’s spot as the new face of Rampage. [Just Jared] – The Israeli beauty may no longer have a sexy boyfriend, but she’s got a very hot new business deal.
  • This amazing graphic of “Things To Say During Sex” just took a big ol’ weight off our shoulders. [Incredimazing]
  • In a blog for the Huffington Post, Jamie Lee Curtis admitted she was once addicted to painkillers, and empathizes with Michael Jackson and his addiction to drugs [People] — Sadly, Jackson never got over his drug abuse, as Curtis did.

Keep reading »

Today’s Lady News: Hillary Clinton Probably Won’t Ever Be President

  • Speaking on a Thai television show, Hillary Clinton said she isn’t thinking about the 2012 election and is “100 percent focused” on her Secretary of State gig. “I doubt very much that anything like that will ever be part of my life,” she said. [Huffington Post]
  • After critics balked at the idea of using taxpayer money for abortions under Obama’s proposed health care bill, politicians are working on an amendment with a “compromise” in the U.S. House version of the bill. [WSJ] — We’re guessing this “compromise” will mean states can ix-nay the unding-fay?
  • NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell said he “will look into” allegations that Pittsburgh Steelers’ quarterback, “Big Ben” Ben Roethlisberger, sexually assaulted a former casino employee in Nevada last year. The woman says Big Ben asked her to come up to his hotel room to fix his TV, where he fondled her breasts and pushed her on the bed. She is seeking half a million dollars in damages. [NY Daily News]

Keep reading »

South Korea Parliament Turns Into WWF Match

Shattered glass, broken furniture, biting, shoving, beating, jumping and throwing blunt objects — just another day in Parliament in South Korea. Yesterday, a female lawmaker was rushed to the hospital with injuries after an ordinary session turned into an episode of “UFC Ultimate Fighting.” The rampage began when members of the majority party, the Grand National Party, tried to enter the building to vote on a bill loosening restrictions on media ownership of TV networks. Men and women from the opposing parties began stacking up furniture to block the ruling members from entering the National Assembly. When that didn’t work, they took to clawing each other’s eyes out. Peeps who opposed the bill attacked anyone trying to approach the podium by throwing heavy objects and even body-slamming them.
Keep reading »

Miss Plastic Hungary Pageant Seeks “Body Work” Contestants

“Ever had plastic surgery to become beautiful? Are you proud of your body? Would you like to put yourself to the test?” These are all questions most beauty queens would be too embarrassed to answer, but one Hungarian company isn’t afraid to ask. The website MissPlasticHungary.hu is seeking contestants for what it says is the first ever beauty pageant for women who have had cosmetic surgery. Pageant organizers are trying to fight the stigma associated with beauty operations in Hungary. The contest is open to women between the ages of 18 and 30 and to women older than 30 in the “dame” category, all of whom must have had a surgical procedure performed under local or general anesthesia; a simple Botox injection won’t suffice, and neither will extremely large breasts (remember they’re trying to fight the stigma?). So far, 100 entrants have already signed up for the pageant that is supposed to occur on October 9. Maybe Carrie Prejean has a pageant comeback in her future? [Reuters] Keep reading »

We’re Back!

Hi, readers! We’ve been having some server issues today, but we’re working them out. You might have missed a few of the posts we’ve put up as a result, so here’s your recommended reading list:

Stay tuned for more fun. Keep reading »

Girls Want A BFF, Boys Like Hanging Out In Big Groups

Those kooky scientists, always launching big, expensive studies to tell us things we already know. Researchers at the National Institute of Mental Health took MRIs of children’s brains to figure out what exactly happens when they make a new friend. The kids were asked to look at pictures of potential friends and rate them, depending on interest. Researchers told the test subjects they would be meeting their favorites from the pictures in a few weeks. For girls, preparing to meet a friend got their brains all hyped up. But boys’ brains pretty much did nothing at all. (Ha, what else is new?) The scientists concluded that this shows that girls tend towards one-on-one relationships, while boys prefer the nature of large groups. Perhaps so they have more people to burp with? [Time] Keep reading »

Why Do So Many People Want To Watch The Erin Andrews Video?

A hot, naked, blonde woman caught on tape. A lot of straight men don’t need to hear anything more. Sold.

But what if we find out the video was filmed without the knowledge of the unwitting star? What if it’s a super creepy invasion of privacy?

Same reaction, apparently. Yeah, the grossest part of this whole Erin Andrews story—the pretty, blonde ESPN sports reporter who was recorded naked in her hotel room through a peephole—isn’t that some creep made a peeping Tom video. It’s how so many people, knowing Andrews didn’t consent to being filmed, still wanted to watch it.

Keep reading »

Celebrities Love Reading Kids Books

Although Will Arnett may have ruined “Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret” forever during an episode of “Late Night with Jimmy Fallon,” he’s not the first celebrity to give his own rendering of a literary work for tots. From creepy to endearing, celebrities have been reading children’s books and nursery rhymes since long before Arnett butchered the Judy Blume line, “I’ve got a bra now, it’d be nice if I had something to put in it.” Here are our favorite clips, after the jump… Keep reading »

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