What had the cool girls muffling their laughter in the cubicle this week? These were the most popular stories of the week on The Frisky:

MONDAY
Most Read: 10 Ways Not To Be The Trampy One At Your Office Cocktail Party
Most Re-Tweeted: 10 Sex Don’ts According To Men

• Roman Polanski’s attorney said he has already been punished enough by serving 42 days in prison back in 1978. You know, after he gave drugs to and raped a 13-year-old girl? Forty-two days! Polanski is currently in jail in Switzerland and may be in prison for up to two years if he’s sent back to the U.S. for a trial. [L.A. Times]
• Lady buffaloes in California are being put on birth control because they’re screwing like bunnies. Sorry, folks, I just thought slutty buffaloes would make you giggle on a Friday afternoon. [L.A. Times]

On my very first date with my boyfriend, I didn’t know if he was going to kiss me. I didn’t know yet that he loves Concord grapes, plays the saxophone and has never seen a Woody Allen movie. But I did know for certain that I wanted this person with whom I’d just eaten dinner to be in my life, somehow. I remember sitting across from him at a table in a Portuguese restaurant, smiling, and thinking, “Whatever happens after this date, I really hope we become friends. You’re cool.”

Flash forward six intense, crazy-in-love months and this man is not only boyfriend—he is my closest friend now, too, the one who knows everything about what goes on with my family, what goes on at work, what weird dreams woke me up in the middle of the night.

And I’m not entirely sure that’s a good thing.

Jude Law is an accomplished actor, infamous cheater, impregnator of some random model in Florida, and now, a fruit thrower. Law has been performing onstage in “Hamlet” in New York City recently and he rented an apartment in downtown Manhattan. It just so happens his swank bachelor pad is right next to an NYU freshman dormitory, Hayden Hall, with a balcony in full view of the students. An incredible crib like this probably rents for close to $10,000 a month (no, I’m not kidding), which would explain why Law got pissy when freshmen called out to him from their bedroom windows.

Megan Fox channels her inner ‘80s-era Suzanne Somers, apparently in an outtake from the New York Times Magazine photo shoot.  [Megan-Fox.net]

• Conan O’Brien is the subject of pissy Tweets by plus-sized actresses Kirstie Alley and Star Jones after cracking jokes about Alley’s size. Example? A recent earthquake drill in California might have just been a response to Alley jazzercising. [New York Daily News]—Ah, fat jokes: the province of lazy comedians. Maybe he could mix up his repertoire and do ugly jokes, too? And for her part, maybe Alley could practice what she preaches and stop drawing so much attention to her own weight.
• An analysis by George Washington University’s School of Public Health and Health Services found that the Stupak-Pitts Amendment to Obama’s health care reform bill would “produce industry-wide effects, leading to the elimination of health plan coverage for nearly all medically indicated abortions.” The GW study arrived at this conclusion after examining how “the health benefits services industry adjusts its products over time to conform to the regulatory environment in which it operates.” [George Washington University Medical Center]

It’s not to hang their nice suit jackets, that’s for sure! Here’s some straight-to-the-point activism: a cell phone company, CREDO Mobile, is mailing coat hangers to all the democratic members of the House of Representatives who voted in support of the Stupak-Pitts Amendment in Obama’s health care reform bill. (CREDO must have read our piece, “How The Health Care Reform Bill Is Screwing Over Women With An Abortion Amendment”! Right?) The coat hangers are definitely a gruesome, but clear, reminder of what some women will do when their access to abortions is restricted. So far, over 116,000 have been sent.

But how come all of the 240 politicians who voted for Stupak-Pitts didn’t receive a coat hanger in the mail? After all, democrats aren’t the only ones who voted in favor of this amendment, just to pass the health care reform bill. [CREDO Action]

“Vampirella was so hot I used to buy every comic I could get my hands on. The fact she didn’t exist didn’t bother me because we have these quintessential female images in our mind, and in the case of the male mind, they’re grossly distorted. When you see something that reflects your id, it works for you…Most of men’s problems with women probably have to do with realizing women are real and most of them don’t look or act like Vampirella. A big recalibration happens when we’re forced to deal with real women, and there’s a certain geek population that would much rather deal with fantasy women than real women. Let’s face it: Real women are complicated. You can try your whole life and not understand them.”

—Avatar director James Cameron explains why nerds who are into fantasy women don’t get laid as much as men who can deal with, um, real women [Playboy]

Alexandra Kerry, 36, the eldest daughter of Massachusetts Senator John Kerry, was arrested last night for allegedly driving drunk. The LAPD said Kerry was stopped on a Hollywood street at 12:40 a.m., failed a sobriety test and was charged with a DUI. [AP] Come on, Alexandra Kerry! Even the Bush twins didn’t get themselves arrested. Well, if this turns out to be true, maybe Alexandra will come around and be glad she got busted before she got behind the wheel and killed someone.

File under: Furniture That Will Cause Potential Hookups To Run Screaming Out Your Front Door. (Also, Things That Will Scare Any Cows That Wander Into Your Bedroom.) [Hamburger Bed]