I just celebrated my first birthday as a married woman. But instead of enjoying a romantic dinner with my husband, I was at sea with a long-lost crush who re-entered my life last year. My husband knows about him, and gave me his blessing to go with him on the three-day cruise to the Bahamas. He actually met the guy once, at a club on Canal Street six years ago. He’s been supportive of this reunion, even when I came home giddy from a night out with him, or when I flew to Portland, Maine, in March for a spring rendezvous.
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After thinking a lot about that crazy singles map of the US and how all the ladies on the East Coast are screwed, I got back to my navel gazing about what it means to be single. (I have plenty time alone to think about these things.) I moved on from my bubble of self-absorption (played out) and started wondering what it must be like to be single in other countries—not that I’m thinking of fleeing or anything. Is it better in France where fidelity is not a cultural moray? Is it worse in India with the caste system and arranged marriages? And what are those cold singles in Iceland doing to stay warm? Well wonder no more, because Liz Tuccillo (Mrs. “She’s Not That Into You” and former “Sex and the City” writer) is travlling the globe to demystify singlehood in an awesome web series called, “How to be Single.” Um…amazing! After the jump, a few of my fave revelations from single sisters around the world. [Your Tango] Keep reading »
The discussion of the trials and tribulations of long distance relationships is not a new one. Some swear a couple can survive the distance while others refuse to entertain the possibility that two people can stay connected when there is significant mileage between them. I used to be a bit of a compulsive long distance dater. My first two serious relationships were with British boys, which would soon later develop into a habit of only getting involved with foreign guys. Until recently I never questioned if getting involved in a relationship which is destined to be mostly long distance was a good idea. In my mind, if I was in love it would be sheer madness not to stay together. If true love can overcome death in “The Princess Bride” than of course it can overcome a minor issue such as distance. A few years and broken hearts later, I am not so sure. Keep reading »
Julieanne Smolinski over at Lemondrop had the pleasure of attending a “Pick-Up Artist” seminar, in which poor saps shelled out nearly $3,000 to be educated by Love Systems Inc. (formerly known as the Mystery Method). The advice was pretty pathetic, and I’m about to save some schmucks a lot of money. Keep reading »
Well-known peacenik Mahatma Ghandi famously proclaimed, “An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.” Sorry, Ghandi, but I beg to disagree. The sad fact is, there are times in a lady’s life when revenge tastes pretty sweet. (Even in a blind taste test.)
One of those times is after some cad shatters your tender little heart into a billion tiny shards. Sure, embracing the gloom is one way of dealing, but who are you really hurting by forcing ice cream down your pie-hole whilst weeping over Lifetime movies and stalking his Facebook page? Answer: Yourself.
Wouldn’t it be more fun to hurt him? The dude who done you wrong? Keep reading »
For the first two years of my relationship with my Large Greek Boyfriend, his mom didn’t acknowledge me by name. I was simply, “The Girl.”
“Are you bringing The Girl?” she’d inquire when he made plans for family dinner. “Does The Girl like spanikopita?” Being a typical dude, it didn’t register on the BF’s radar, but her refusal to eke out more than those two syllables made me paranoid. Did she not like me because I’m not Greek? Had I said something stupid during our initial meet and greet? He assured me she liked me just fine, she just didn’t want to bother learning a name if I wasn’t going to stick around.
Whatever the case, his mom’s inability to say my name paled in comparison to 28-year-old lawyer Anna’s mother-in-law. “I met her at our wedding and the first thing she said to me—her new daughter-in-law—was, ‘So, are you pregnant?’”
Annoyed, Anna told her she’d have to wait and see. Things got worse after Anna gave birth to their son (two years later, thank you very much!). “The doctor came in to ask how I was doing and before I could answer—and in front of everyone—my mother-in-law asked the doctor, ‘How much for a paternity test?’” Sweet! Keep reading »
Nowhere is the difference between men and women so glaring as when it comes down to the demise of a relationship. Specifically, the unexpected, unwanted, one-sided break-up otherwise known as the dumping.
A dumped dude might get angry. Then again, he might just get depressed and mope quietly in his room. He may go to a strip club or pick up a one-night-stand at a bar. What he won’t do is call up all his buddies and poll them about what they think his ex really meant when she quit returning his calls. Nor will he tearfully declare that said ex must have been either too intimidated by his devastating intellect and/or simply too in love with him.
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When I questioned a friend about why she was marrying a guy whom she found only mildly attractive, didn’t enjoy having sex with and wasn’t in love with, she told me this: “Marriage isn’t about love, it’s about finding the person who gets on your nerves the least.”
I recall being both horrified and saddened by her cynicism. But as I pondered it further, I wondered if she might have a point. I was single at the time. A long-term relationship had gone bust a few years earlier and after a hyper-extended mourning period I’d been dating a seemingly non-stop parade of utterly unsuitable suitors. Keep reading »
How much do you really need to know?
I still remember the day I walked into my house only to be confronted by my entire family staring at me like I was an alien as my mother shrieked through her tears, “Thank god you’re home—I thought you were dead!!!”
Um, what? Keep reading »