America is a nation obsessed with other people’s lives. A visitor glancing at our magazine and newspaper racks or flipping through TV channels immediately knows where our priorities lie, and it’s not with dissecting world politics. Instead, we hunt for news about the latest troubled starlet and watch other people’s lives unfold via reality TV shows. Keep reading »
Do you ever feel like you’re constantly arguing with your boyfriend about going to an expensive restaurant or buying a cheapo shirt? It might be a sign that you’re meant for each other. A study from the Wharton School of Finance and Northwest University, “Fatal (Fiscal) Attraction,” has found that financial opposites really do attract. Even though most people say they would be happy to marry someone with the same spending habits, the survey found that most people date folks who do the opposite as themselves. So, spenders dig savers and savers dig spenders. Is this true for you? [Yahoo News] Keep reading »
The first time I met my now-close friend Gina, she was rhapsodizing about her awesome boyfriend, Eugene. After a few minutes, I realized I’d already met him. But he wasn’t the sweetheart she was describing.
I was familiar with Eugene because the weekend before he had propositioned me in a particularly crude manner. I realized I had two choices: tell her what kind of loathsome dirtbag she was dating or keep my mouth shut in the hopes that she’d someday figure it out on her own.
I went with Option A. I told Gina that she could do much better than that jerk and blurted out the whole tacky tale. She was understandably upset, but appreciated my candor. I was lucky—she dumped him, but kept me as a friend. Keep reading »
I’ll never forget the first time I met the mother of a particular ex-boyfriend. We were vacationing together in the South of France (glamorous locale, yes, but not the place you want to spend a week with your boyfriend’s family!) and I was sort of stunned by the physical relationship between my then-boyfriend and his mother. I should say they’re from a different cultural background than I (they’re Middle Eastern) and maybe that was part of it, but they literally could NOT keep their hands off each other. They hugged, kissed on the lips, caressed each other. It was seriously bizarre. At one point, my ex-boyfriend’s mother even talked about his “golden penis” (over dinner!) — a term she said was some kind of figure of speech in their culture. Um, ohhhkay. Needless to say, it was trés uncomfortable for me and when we broke up several months later it was with much relief that I realized I’d never have to endure another mother-son make-out fest ever again. Remembering all this, I read today’s letter in Salon’s advice column with a lot of empathy. Read it yourself after the jump. Keep reading »
It’s undeniable that marriage and relationships in general look nothing like they did 40 years ago. What’s happened? Women’s lib, skyrocketing divorce rates, the death of the nuclear family — and that’s just for starters. The whole game has changed. Sometimes I think that each generation exhibits a reactionary trend to their predecessors. I am part of the “divorced parents” era. Although my parents are still married, about 60 percent of all people I meet my age come from broken homes. While this phenomenon didn’t necessarily make us “anti-marriage,” it has certainly made us “marriage cautious” or “marriage disillusioned.” As a modern woman I know the statistics – if I ever do tie the knot, I know it ain’t gonna be all sunshine and roses. And that’s why I plan to be as sure as I can possibly, possibly be. Before I exchange any vows, I’ve made a vow to myself: I MUST live with someone before I marry him. I’m not alone in this thinking. About 70 percent of couples are cohabitating before marriage these days. Keep reading »
So, that’s it. You’ve decided to move in together. You’re excited, in love, and ready to go for it. People are warning you that it’s a big deal, but you are different and so is your relationship. Is it such a big deal, though? Yes. After all, it’s like marriage without the standup mixer and the tax break. Keep reading »
Few things are more entertaining than bad date stories. Who wants to hear about hearts and flowers when flatulence and festering sores are so much more fun? Which is why when my friend Sal wanted to share what she assured me were horror stories about her recent attempts at online dating, I was ecstatic – joke material!
As I slid onto the bar stool next to her, I noticed she looked a little down. I immediately felt guilty about my initial excitement. Hmm. “What happened?” I asked.
“Nothing really,” she shrugged. It seems she’d met up with two different men and both were just meh. “I had nothing in common with either,” she complained.
“And?” I inquired.
She shot me a look. “And what?” she answered. “They were both really boring.”
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Here’s proof that you can never read a guy, or never know what he’s really thinking. Last week, I participated in The New York Post‘s “Meet Market,” a weekly feature that sets up couples, and then reports on their dates. Aside from a horrible photo of me in a high-circulation newspaper (really…are my cheeks really that big and shiny?), the experience was enjoyable because I got a free meal, and for the first time ever, I also saw the honest report of the man’s side of the date. And let me tell you, it wasn’t at all what I expected. For starters, the moment I saw the photo, I knew my perception was off. During our date, a photographer came and had us act out different scenarios, for example, where we’re both happy and the date went great, or if I gave the evening a bad report, I would look bored and he would look amused, etc, etc. I was fairly sure that I would open my paper to see a picture of us both smiling. Wrong. There I am, beaming like a fool and my date, Travis, looking horrified. Oh no, I thought. He’s said something awful about me, I imagined, before I could even begin reading the article. Keep reading »
My great Aunt Agatha prided herself on being married for 75 years and she had a diamond ring on each finger – gifts to her for allowing Guiseppe, her husband, his afternoon “exercise.”
We often asked her why she had so many diamonds and she would say, “Some day, you will understand.” And what we came to understand is that her husband had mistresses, or as we came to hear her whisper, “comare.” Continue reading… Keep reading »
How many times have you been out with a foxy new someone only to have him do or say something that made your stomach lurch—and not in an I-wanna-make-babies-with-him-now way. Maybe he was nasty to your waiter. Perhaps it was more subtle—he snickered when you tripped or didn’t introduce you to the attractive “friend” you ran into. Then again, maybe there was nothing you could articulate, but he just felt off. How many times have you ignored that feeling?
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