Tag Archives: hooking up

Ask A Married Guy: When He Says He’s “Just Not Sure”

Married Guy: Players
Ask A Married Guy: "Did I Just Get Played By The Player-Of-All-Players?"
"Did I just get played by the player of all players?!" Read More »
The Do-Not-Date List
Guys you should avoid at all costs! Read More »

This is our friend Tom. He’s a married guy with tons of relationship experience, and a skilled advice giver who’s here to answer all your pressing sex, dating and relationship questions. Have a query for Tom? Email him at friskymarriedguy@gmail.com! All questions will be posted anonymously, unless otherwise requested.

I’ve been dating this amazing guy for 10 months. Two months into our relationship, he told me he loved me and I realized I loved him back. Lately, things have started to change. He spends less time with me and stopped saying he loved me (the only exception is when he’s drunk).

When I finally asked him about it, he said that he likes me now (like, not love) but isn’t sure what the future holds. At this point, I cannot imagine doing anything but break up with him. However, he still wants to keep seeing me or take a break to sort his feelings out. When I prodded him further, he confessed that the driving factor in all this is his fear of commitment. Some days he says he wants to spend the rest of his life with me, other days he’s not so sure. He wants some time to sort out his feelings. The other item we discussed is that we don’t ever really talk about the deep stuff, that even though we’ve been dating for a while, we don’t actually know each other all that well. He thinks maybe if we continue seeing each other and getting to know each other better, his feelings may change.

I don’t know if I should cut my losses and end this relationship now. What’s the point of getting my hopes up again or wasting my time by continuing to see each other? What is wrong with him — if he doesn’t love me anymore, why can’t he just leave it be? – BC

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9 Guys Share Their Biggest Sex Regrets

sex-regret-men

Sure, I’d imagine some guys wish they took advantage of their single days more, just as women do. But sex regrets have to go beyond not hooking up with the hot girl at the bar for some men. To discover guys’ I-really-wish-I-hadn’t sexcapades, we went right to the source. Turns out, they’ve had their fair share of unfavorable partners in the bedroom (and park), too. Read all 9 sex regrets on Your Tango …

Study: Casual Sex Might Be Making Teenagers Sad

Study: Casual Sex Might Be Making Teenagers Sad

A new study from Ohio State University in the Journal of Sex Research suggests that casual teenage sex has a reciprocal relationship with poor mental health – and that they contribute to one another over time.

An important thing to note is that this link was found to be the same for both men and women. “That was unexpected because there is still this sexual double standard in society that says it is OK for men to have casual sexual relationships, but it is not OK for women,” said assistant professor of human sciences Claire Kamp Dush, Ph.D. In this sense, it seems that both genders have the same relationship to casual sex — if only pop culture would catch on to that! Keep reading »

Ask A Married Guy: “Did I Just Get Played By The Player-Of-All-Players?”

Ask A Married Guy: "Did I Just Get Played By The Player-Of-All-Players?"

This is our friend Tom. He’s a married guy with tons of relationship experience, and a skilled advice giver who’s here to answer all your pressing sex, dating and relationship questions. Have a query for Tom? Email him at friskymarriedguy@gmail.com! All questions will be posted anonymously, unless otherwise requested.

So I’ve been a friend of this good guy for over 10 years.  We’ve always had sexual tension, but I never really gave a thought to it nor did I think we were going to act on it. On a total random drunken night, we had sex.  So we decided to go on a date, and it really was no different from any other time we’ve hung out.  He said stupid things to me all night like “You’re my dream girl,” and to be honest, I loved it and had a great time.  I didn’t realized how much I actually like this guy, until one day – he just stopped calling. He’d make plans, and cancel last minute, which is unlike him. We’ve always been close, and I’ve known FOR YEARS that he is a commitment-phobe.  All the years that we’ve been friends, he’s never had a single date. Is this guy genuinely scared of me/relationships or did I just get played by the player-of-all-players? — Alisa

You did not get played. You got “manned.”

Let me tell you something about men. Their deepest, darkest fear is being trapped.  It’s constant. They fear it even when there are no traps in sight. Put a man in a wide-open emotional space, with nothing but happy meadows and tweeting birds for miles around, and he’ll still be terrified of some girl popping up yelling, “I’m pregnant and it’s yours!” Keep reading »

This Contest Has Named Britain’s Horniest Student And I Feel Weird About It

Shag At Uni, “the UK’s naughtiest student hook-up site,” has named a winner in their contest to find Britain’s Horniest Student. Twenty-year-old Elina Desaine is a computer science student at the University of Exeter and is so horny she’s unsure of how many people she’s slept with, or of many of their names. She keeps track of her partners by writing a list with notes about who they are, like “French guy” or “third year.” Elina was born in Latvia and sometimes refers to herself as “Slutvian” or “Sexeter.” A self-proclaimed modern-day feminist, Elina says she is “just having fun” and that “all my friends are the same – we are all just up for having a great time and going out … [College] life is three years to be wild before it starts settling down and it really flies by.” Keep reading »

The Soapbox: No, But Seriously, Sex Can Be Satisfying Without Orgasm

The Soapbox: No, But Seriously, Sex Can Be Satisfying Without Orgasm

I have slept with a fair amount of people. But I’ve orgasmed with only one, the person I was in a long-term relationship with. All of my other sexual encounters have been varying degrees of fun, but have not resulted in the Big O. For me at least — the men I’ve slept with always come. This never comes as a surprise to me. I don’t expect to come from casual sex, while I’m sure every dude I have it with does. As Natalie Kitroeff notes in an article for The New York Times, “in hookups, inequality still reigns.”

Here’s what I’ve noticed over, uh, the last 13 years of having sex. Some guys, even random dudes I’ve brought home from bars, are really, really into getting women off. But most of them are driven by their own egos. “Every girl I’ve ever been with has come” is something I’ve heard more than a few times from guys who just won’t stop until they’re sure you’ve reached their idea of satisfaction — orgasm. I’ve been known to fake it with these men, because it’s just so much easier than explaining to a relative stranger “I just can’t orgasm unless I am really, really, really in the right mood and there are no distractions and I’m 1000 percent relaxed and my OCD/ADD isn’t acting up. Also you have to be licking my pussy just right and it also helps if I use my vibrator while you’re fucking me, but even then it just might not happen. Don’t take it personally, I’m still having a great time!” I have given a few dudes the short version of that explanation and they all looked at me like I just killed their puppy. Keep reading »

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