Tag Archives: hooking up

5 Things Everyone Needs To Demand From Their Casual Hookup

There he is. Your eyes meet. The butterflies in your stomach are loud enough for the entire room to hear. Your palms moisten and your palpitating heart seems to want to beat out of your chest. You muster up the courage to walk to him, but someone has you beat.

Think quick. You make a detour to the bathroom, as to not draw too much attention to yourself. Who was that girl? It doesn’t matter anyway, right? The two of you only casually hookup.

Friends with benefits, hooking up, whatever you decide to call it — gets messy. Sure, you get the “buddy and the boo,” but tippy toeing around those invisible boundaries of “Am I wrong for feeling this way?” gets old. A casual relationship doesn’t mean you shouldn’t have a clear division of what you’re willing to accept. Read more at College Candy…

True Story: I Only Use The Pullout Method

On The Pullout Method
sex education photo
The pullout method is *almost* as effective as condoms, study says. Read More »
Real Talk: Birth Control
real women talk about birth control
Part one of our Real Talk on real women's birth control options. Read More »
Birth Control Myths
bigger breasts are a birth control pill myth
Bigger boobs and weight gain are birth control myths. Read More »
True Story: I Only Use The Pullout Method

According to New York magazine, sexually active hetero women in their 20s and 30s are heretofore dubbed the “pullout generation.” We’ve earned this moniker because, for various reasons, we’ve turned up our noses at “conventional forms of birth control,” from the the Pill to condoms, and started relying on the withdrawal method to avoid pregnancy. The article suggests some of the reasons why we are shunning BC — from noxious side effects of the Pill, to prohibitive costs, to pressure from men not to use condoms, to putting more focus on our sexual pleasure — but the more troubling part, perhaps, is that we’re “reluctant to admit [it], even after a few cocktails.”

I will attest to this. I only use the pullout method, but am loathe to say so to my Pill loyalist friends or my gyno, who I’m convinced will give me a finger-wagging lecture. I’m in my 30s! While I’m not actively looking to be a parent right this minute, an unplanned pregnancy also would not ruin my life. There seems to be this pervasive idea that it’s ignorant or irresponsible not to use conventional birth control. After all, you’re relying on someone else to act swiftly. Keep reading »

Adolescent Boys Think Sexual Aggression Is Flirting, Apparently?

Ask Me Out
Ask us out on a damn date! Read More »
Science Explains Turnoffs
7 Signs That You're The One Who’s Emotionally Unavailable
Six things men do to get laid that science says turn women off. Read More »
Victorian-Era Dating
Don't worry, Victorian-era dating was also completely confusing. Read More »
How To Be Romantic...
...without being creepy! Read More »
teen boys and sexually aggressive flirting

For a long time, eyebrow-arching and pearl-clutching over “hookup culture” has focused on young women: they will feel used by young men and come to believe they can only derive value in themselves from their sexuality. Such concerns have been roundly and fairly criticizing as portraying young women as victims lacking in agency, or worse, in need of a paternalistic watchful eye.

There has been less of a focus on how hookup culture affects young men. According to a piece by the usually-spot-on journalist Abigail Pesta, writing for NBCnews.com, there is “an increasing confusion among boys about how to behave” and experts say “boys who engage in this kind of sexualized behavior say they have no intention to be hostile or demeaning — precisely the opposite. While they admit they are pushing limits, they also think they are simply courting.”

Oh dear. Keep reading »

Bold Move! UConn Bans Student-Teacher Relationships

Guys To Date In College
Dating Don'ts: Guys You'll Wish You Had Gone Out With In College
You might pass up these dudes. Don't. Read More »
Sex Abuse At College
A woman responds to her son being accused of sexual assault. Read More »
The Sexiest Colleges
Playboy says the best colleges to get laid are... Read More »
uconn faculty student relationship ban

The University of Connecticut officially banned any romantic relationships between students and faculty Wednesday under their “Policy Against Discrimination, Harassment and Inappropriate Romantic Relationships.” While undergrad relationships with faculty are completely banned, graduate student romances are forbidden only when a faculty member is in a position of power over the student.

Keep reading »

15 People, Places & Positions On The Frisky’s To-Do List

15 People, Places & Positions On The Frisky's To-Do List

The things on my personal life bucket list — skydiving, a hot air balloon ride at sunrise, swimming with and/or near a manatee, a glimpse of Beyonce casually pushing Blue Ivy on a swing set in Brooklyn — are all perfectly reasonable, potentially feasible and not entirely out of the realm of possibility. I love having attainable goals, so why not apply the same concept to the wild and wonderful world of sexy times? Use this as a guide, inspired by the hilarious new movie “The To Do List,” starring the fantastic Aubrey Plaza, as a list of gentle suggestions and possibilities. It’s summer, it’s hot and no one’s wearing much clothing anyway — embrace it! For your consideration, I present the top 15 people, places and positions on our sexual to-do list. Keep reading »

Hotel Sex
You're paying big bucks, make it great. Read More »
Outdoor Sex
Places to have it! Read More »

8 Times We Continued To Hook Up With A Guy Even Though We Knew He Was Awful

First Date Questions
first date questions
We wish we could ask these questions, but we know we can't. Read More »
Hookups We Regret
Don't remind us we did that. Read More »
Do Not Date These Guys
12 guys you shouldn't date. Read More »
Bad Hookup Stories

We’ve all had that moment (or many moments) in our love lives when we knew a guy was awful, like, say, when he told us he had to chew gum all the time because of his halitosis and rotten wisdom teeth, but we continued to let him put his tongue in our mouth for far too long after that. Not that any of us have done that. OK, maybe we have. What’s really intriguing about this phenomenon is how, when presented with this odd behavior or its equivalent in a friendship or  any other situation in the entire world that doesn’t involve hooking up, we’d be out of there so fast. But there is an aura surrounding sex that makes us just be, like, whatever, and pull the wool over our own eyes. And once you’ve come out of the fog of denial, you’re left with a special kind of shame. Today, we unload that shame (well, anonymously) and admit that we were pulling the wool over our eyes with these guys. Consider these cautionary tales… Keep reading »

5 Lies You’ve Been Told About What Men Want

8 lies you can tell in bed

Here’s the scenario: You’re out with the gals and one of them is smack dab in the middle of a dating crisis. One of your friends offers the group what she thinks is stellar advice on men and you’re left thinking, “Jeez, is that really what men want?”

So many of us grow up being told lies about what men want in a relationship and what men are looking for in a wife. These lies are so rampant that I get questions everyday in my inbox asking me advice based on these lies: How do I make him think I don’t like him so that he wants me? How do I act more “chill” like his friend, so that he enjoys hanging out with me? How do I pretend I’m not mad at him when I feel so angry inside? Read more on Your Tango…

Dating Don’ts: A Field Guide To Getting Lucky At A Wedding

Wedding Hookups
bride and bridesmaid photo
Who you should sleep with at your next wedding. Read More »
Wedding Survival Guide
It's wedding season! Here's how to get through it. Read More »
Single At A Wedding
Three reasons why going to a wedding alone is good for your self-esteem. Read More »
A field guide to hooking up at a wedding.

Wedding season is kind of the best. I gladly welcome any excuse to put on a fancy dress, throw on some lipstick and toast the merry union of two souls, united in common interests, rooted in love. Weddings exist on a plane where everything is heightened, cast in a rosy glow fueled by champagne and cake and the joy of others. Every song is your song, in every conversation you are charming and witty, and, after a while, everyone — and I mean everyone — looks like a prime candidate for a clandestine makeout sesh over in the corner by the photo booth.  Before you slink over to the target in your crosshairs, check yourself. Let us help you. Follow this guide, and you should be golden. Keep reading »

What Dudes Are Saying: 27 Things That Will Get You Laid At 25 & Rejected At 35

Photo of Brad Pitt in Thelma & Louise

Just because it worked for you back then doesn’t mean it’s still going to work for you now. Something happens between the early 20s to the early 30s that requires a man to change his approach to meeting women. Some guys age accordingly — it’s an effortless transition from keg-stands with the guys to standup paddle-boarding with your lovely new wife. But for most of us, there are some bumps in the road. It’s not always obvious which of your habits will make you into a social pariah as you get older. Until now — no more guessing required. Here are 27 things guaranteed to get you laid at 25 and rejected at 35. Read more on Ask Men…

White Lies Women Tell To Get Laid

Once again I was looking at Cosmo, furrowing intensely and wondering where on earth they come up with their nonsense. I do this from time to time because I follow them on Twitter (don’t ask me why.) I also like to give my brow a workout with all the aforementioned furrowing.

In this episode of Cosmo forces Chatel to face-palm, they gathered up some of the lies men tell to get into the pants of the ladies:

You already know men will do anything to get a woman into bed—especially when she’s as awesome as you are. And they’re rarely slick about it. That’s why we asked you to tweet us the biggest doozies you’ve heard from dudes in search of a little nooky. Get ready to LOL at these weak lines. Keep reading »

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