As I wrote yesterday, if you have any desire to possibly, maybe having something deeper than bed rockin’ nookie with a dude, you shouldn’t sleep with him on the first date. I came to this conclusion after many years of experience, chatting with friends (men and women), and having a late night, New Year’s champagne-infused to heart-to-heart with a friend’s husband. But I didn’t think it was fair to use him as my sole source, so I decided to pester the guys on my IM about their experience and impressions of first date sex and whether they could see developing a relationship with a lady they banged on the first date. Keep reading »
I’m going to make a general statement here that’s probably going to get me flamed. If you have any interest in something more than sexual with a guy, do not have sex with him on the first date. While I’m usually against such “dating rules,” there are some logical conclusions I’ve come to after observing men and women, hearing war stories from friends, and listening to the advice of male friends whom I respect. With obvious exceptions (yes, I’m sure you do know someone who slept with her husband of 60 years on the first date), the chance of having a long-term relationship with someone goes down, way down, if you bone on the first date. Keep reading »
To make a long story short, my breakup is officially official. It became sort of official a few months ago when I decided to call it a breakup rather than a “break” or a “separation,” but it didn’t become officially official until my ex told me, a week ago, that he was no longer in love with me. Until that point, I was definitely holding out hope for a potential reconciliation — after all, the “break” was supposed to be time for him to explore and deal with his issues — but when someone tells you that they don’t love you anymore, well, whether you believe them or not, and whether you think they need serious help, you kind of just need to accept it and move on. So I did. And it cost me $527. But it was worth it. Keep reading »
It’s hard not to get smitten with someone at an open bar, especially if you’re single in December. The tricky thing is that a lot of the holiday parties are for business, so pleasure would have to be a secret bonus. However, the seasonal soirées bring about the best time to finally go for that cutie in accounting that you’ve had your eye on. After a year’s worth of fantasizing over the copy machine, a hot romp with an officemate can be spicier than eggnog. While it might not be the most professional move, it can be just what you need to get you in the giving spirit. So, here’s how you turn the heat up on your love life during the cold weather holiday gatherings…
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NonSociety blogger and Time Out New York columnist Julia Allison posed a question in her site the other day — What is a “normal” length of time to wait before having sex with a new partner? — and proposed an answer:
My methodology (for women, of course): if you think you’ve waited long enough, wait even longer. If you like the guy at ALL, don’t think about sleeping with him until at least — AT LEAST — the sixth or seventh date, or four-to-five weeks in, whichever comes last.
I wholeheartedly disagree and actually think this is pretty terrible, game-playing advice. Keep reading »