Lately I’ve been kind of getting in touch with my kinkier side. Being that I didn’t really have a kinky side before, it’s a big deal for me that I’ve discovered the pleasures of, uh, ass-smacking. Now that it’s kind of my “thing,” I’ve been thinking about other people I know and their “things.” I once hooked up with this Brazilian guy in San Francisco (and by hook up, I mean we met at a club, went back to his weird warehouse apartment, and made out a little) and discovered that he had a thing for armpit licking. My armpit, that is. I’ve told this story numerous times and most people express disgust and/or concern that he could die from deodorant poisoning. (He didn’t, as far as I know, but we didn’t keep in touch.) One of the people who expressed disgust is someone I’m sort of seeing — but he has a thing for striped thigh high stockings, so I guess one man’s trash is another man’s treasure. After the jump, I grill the guys on my IM about what turns them on. We get off topic a few times. Sorry. Keep reading »
Singer/music producer/actor Ray J, Brandy Norwood’s brother, is the latest D-lister to look for love on VH1 on “For the Love of Ray J.” But not much is known about this guy who is desperate for musical success and enjoys partying and loving, other than that Kim Kardashian sex tape business… Keep reading »
Last night formerly super hot Joaquin Phoenix made a really bizarro appearance on David Letterman, and generally came off like a zonked out, frowning weirdo. Here’s the thing. I think it’s all a stupid “celebrity punking the media” publicity stunt to go along with his bogus fore into rap music. After all, Casey Affleck is doing a documentary on him and maybe that documentary is going to be called, “HAHA Suckers!” This is the dude that decided to go by the name Leaf for, like, a decade. Keep reading »
I have never met a woman who thought she was bad in bed. I have known plenty of women who can rattle off an impromptu, critical dissertation on the carnal failings of most men. “He didn’t get me off.” “He treated my nipples like Xbox control sticks.” “He came before his pants were off.”
No, not all women are great in bed. Is the onus on dudes to break the bedsprings? I say no. It is both of our responsibilities to be the best lay possible. There are women who kick back Cleopatra-style and dare their men to please them. Women who use men like giant, hairy vibrators, and women who are so eager to please, it can be overwhelming. Keep reading »
With Valentine’s Day around the corner, everyone’s got their minds on sexy time! But before you go bringing that dreamgirl back to your bach pad, make sure your place isn’t a nightmare. Here are some tips on how to make a naked woman feel welcome in your home after the jump…
Keep reading »
You know what has always struck me as unfair? That Valentine’s Day is largely considered to be a holiday for women. In all the ads for the holiday, jewelry, chocolates, flowers, etc. are all gifts given to women, from their devoted, tie-clad husbands and boyfriends. Bu what about dudes? Don’t they want cheesy tokens of love and affection too? Wouldn’t they like to be taken out for a romantic dinner or given a nice piece of man jewelry? (By which I mean a watch. Men should not wear any jewelry outside of a watch and a wedding band. That is a rule.) The first Valentine’s Day I spent with my ex, five years ago, we went out to dinner, but his parents had called up the restaurant and pre-paid for our meal, as a surprise. (I guess they had a sense that I was “The One,” which used to make me go, “Aww,” but now makes me go, “Oops!”) I, however, felt like getting him something too, and ended up giving him four new wine glasses — partially as a joke because I had broken one of his the week before. The point is, don’t men deserve and want a little wooing? And if so, how do they want to be wooed? I asked the fellas. Keep reading »
1. I think I’m awesome, but seriously, why do you think I’m awesome?
2. I can speak dolphin. Which is how I help them.
3. I don’t have a driver’s license and I don’t know how to drive a car. But I know how to drive the ladies wild and I have a license to freak, freak you sweet and spicy, freak you like a jungle cat made out of lava.
4. I write poetry. Here’s a sample, “She walks in beauty, like the night/Of cloudless climes and starry skies/And all that’s best of dark and bright/Meets in her aspect and her eyes.” I just made that up, right now, on the spot.
5. Yes I can, did, will, etc. Keep reading »
When you’re really attracted to a man, it can be hard to tell if he’s attracted to you — especially if he doesn’t know if he’s gay. Even a sexpert like myself has been blindsided by a boyfriend’s (or two) sexuality. But just like cheaters, there are some tell-tale signs if he’s homosexual. So, look out for the red flags that show he should be waving a rainbow one.
Keep reading »