Tag Archives: guy stuff

Mind Of Man: Regular Men Don’t Wear Skinny Jeans

I can’t wear skinny jeans, because I have beefy man legs, mighty logs of muscle and sinew, the end product of hundreds of thousands of years of evolution. Ancient man spent his days running from prehistoric beasts, jumping with simian fury and squatting around the fire. Here’s a short list of the men who can wear skinny jeans: Iggy Pop, The Pumpkin King, moody beanpoles with eating disorders and those with unusually narrow pelvises. If you own and wear a cape or a top hat, you can wear skinny jeans. If you need skin-tight pants that hug your hips, then do as Batman does and wear tights. Regular men should not wear skinny jeans.
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Things In His House That Make Me Sad: His Neglected Backyard Patio

Welcome to “Things In His House That Make Me Sad,” a regular series from the blog Shmitten Kitten that we’ll be featuring on The Frisky, about the stuff seen in so many guys’ apartments that just make you shake your head and sigh.

There are several things in his house that I want nothing to do with. I’d rather kiss a cockroach then step foot in his musty basement. I’d rather eat a bowl of scabs than smell the inside of his microwave. But, what really sends chills down my spine is stepping foot outside onto his neglected backyard patio. Keep reading »

Things In His House That Make Me Sad: His Lone, Off-Brand Cotton Swab

Welcome to “Things In His House That Make Me Sad,” a regular series from the blog Shmitten Kitten that we’ll be featuring on The Frisky, about the stuff seen in so many guys’ apartments that just make you shake your head and sigh.

When I asked him for a Q-tip, he said, “Sorry, babe. I don’t have any.” Frankly, a bathroom without Q-tips is a bathroom I don’t wanna be in. I have needs that can only be met with a firm stick with cotton tightly wound on both sides. I have eyeliner to correct. I have mascara smeared under my eyebrow I have to wipe away. I have an itch in my ear THAT NEEDS TO BE SCRATCHED. Keep reading »

Padded Underwear Gives Men A Bigger Bulge

They’ve already created a Spanx-like tummy-tucker undershirt for men, and now Marks & Spencer, the British version of Target, is introducing “bum lift” underpants, that claim to lift men’s bootays by about a fifth, and “frontal enhancement” underwear that uses an “integral shelf,” to give men what the company describes as a “38 percent visual enhancement in size.” Dave Binns, head of M&S men’s underwear, said: “Our technologists have worked hard to engineer two styles that are comfortable to wear and that give real results. These pants provide a real confidence boost for men and we think they will prove popular with our customers.”

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“Handsome Guy Mask” Is The Stuff Of Nightmares


There are a few occasions, I suppose, when I might be inclined to wear a “handsome guy mask”: 1.) when I just want to run errands and don’t want to be tailed by the paparazzi; 2) when walking my dog down an ex’s street; and 3) when I want to know what it’s like having women throw themselves at me because I am just that attractive. Unfortunately for the latter, I’d probably go with some other company’s “handsome guy mask,” because SPFX’s version is scaring the crap out of me. [The Gloss] Keep reading »

Awful Library Books For Men And Boys

History can be hilarious! Consider words with meanings that have changed over time (remember when “gay” meant happy, like “Grandmother is so gay”?), sexist advertisements that could elicit modern-day lawsuits and library books that now seem grossly inappropriate.

As luck would have it, Michigan librarians Holly Hibner and Mary Kelly discovered that the latter yields an especially large amount of laugh-worthy material. So much, in fact, that it’s become a personal hobby for them to weed out amusing/borderline-obscene books to post on their website, Awful Library Books. Keep reading »

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