That awkward moment when you stand up as the bride starts walking down the aisle, expecting a weepy wedding processional, and instead she bumps and grinds her way through “Crazy Bitch,” a Buckcherry song that was on the “National Lampoon’s Van Wilder” movie soundtrack. Keep reading »
For the most part, I’m super excited when one of my friends gets engaged. Good for them, finding the person of their dreams and shit. But what if your friend gets engaged to someone terrible? How are you supposed to respond to that? Because telling her how you really feel — “Do you really want to make the biggest mistake of your life?!” — is out of the question, and staring at her outstretched, blinged-out hand in horror would be, you know, rude, comedienne Sasheer Zamata has some suggestions for how to respond, without lying, when your pal tells you she’s marrying some douchebag. Step 7, “Gestures and Sounds,” will probably be my go-to. [The Hairpin]
Six bridesmaids seems like a lot. Eight? Ten? Twelve? Now you’re really pushing it. But no bride in the history of pushing it has pushed it quite like Katie Dalby, 26, of the UK, who married with 80 bridesmaids by her side. Eighty. Eight-zero. Keep reading »
Kadie Walsh and Dake Schmidt are both super outdoorsy people who make their living as fishing guides in Alaska. When they decided to get married, it was obvious right off the bat that a traditional church wedding wasn’t an option. Instead, these adventurers held their ceremony where they felt most comfortable: in the middle of the Buskin River in Kodiak, Alaska. The bride wore a lovely white dress; the groom wore waders. A salmon theme ran throughout the ceremony and reception, with the entire bridal party holding floral-accented fishing poles, and of course, the couple caught their own pair of fish to celebrate the occasion. After the jump, check out a picture of the soggy bridesmaids, the first kiss, and their first catch as a married couple! Keep reading »
I don’t know what it is, but bachelorette parties have a knack for bringing out the very worst in women. Inevitably, we all have different viewpoints on the ritual (some of us are pumped to wear penis hats and some of us aren’t), we have various amounts we can and will spend to celebrate our bride friend (anywhere from $50 to $5,000, depending on our disposable income) and we have varying degrees of comfortability with group activities (some of us OMG LUV IT! and some would rather drink Drano).
If you’ve ever been on a bachelorette party planning email chain, then you probably had one of three reactions. You were either: 1) the person planning the bachelorette party and therefore super enthusiastic about it and prone to using tons of caps, emails and text speak, 2) the hater who had to remind everyone that you don’t have an extra $5K lying around to do a weekend jaunt to Paris, or 3) the silent bystander left wishing she was never on the email chain in the first place. To make matters worse, we tend to be loathe to say these things directly because of our concern about being nice, which makes the endless stream of emails a virtual pass-aggro, power jockeying shit show. Michelle Markowitz and Caroline Moss perfectly capture the essence of how a typical bachelorette party planning email chain goes down. Even though they’re not real, they could be. It’s almost like they’ve been through the process before. I’m sure they have. After the jump, just one of the imagined responses to “Ali”‘s email above. [The Toast] Keep reading »
Ours was the shortest courtship that I had ever heard of. Well, except for celebrities, but we all know how those turn out most of the time. Oh, and that girl I knew in college who went on a date with a college professor and was married to him two days later. Fool, was what we muttered under our breath. Over 10 years later, they’re still married, and now have two kids. Perhaps, we were the foolish ones to doubt them.
So when, after just five months of dating someone, I announced to my friends and family that I was engaged, the shock was, well, huge. Admittedly, I was shocked myself, and I expected others to be stunned by it, but the outpouring of public “Congratulations!” messages that were followed by private emails begging, “Are you fucking kidding me?” was something I surely didn’t expect – at least not to that extent. Keep reading »