Tag Archives: friendship

Dear Wendy: “My BFF Dumped Me Because My Husband Is Friends With Her Ex”

I have been friends with an interesting lady for about six years. She even was a bridesmaid in my wedding in July. My problem is this: she and her boyfriend of four years had a pretty nasty breakup a few weeks before my husband’s and my wedding; no one was really in the wrong, they were just really terrible together and the relationship should have ended years ago. Before they broke up, she and her boyfriend and my then-fiance and I would double-date. My husband and her boyfriend ended up really hitting it off and becoming close friends, a status they maintained following the break-up. About a month ago she decided that she had to cut her ex, and everyone connected to him in any way, out of her life, including me. I feel a huge sense of loss because she was perhaps my closest friend, but I never wronged her in any way other than not demanding that my husband end his friendship with her ex as it seems she would have had me do. Should I leave any thoughts of renewing the friendship and move on? Should I call her and ask her to go to lunch? I can’t help but hope that, in time, she will become a more stable and mature person and we can resume our friendship, but at the same time, I am still reeling from the betrayal that I feel. — Missing My (Immature) Friend

Keep reading »

Girl Talk: To Friend Or Not To Friend My Therapist?

With the movie “The Social Network” debuting last week amid much hype, I find myself with an interesting Facebook-induced dilemma: whether or not to “friend” my therapist. We’ve never met in person, yet her perky face keeps popping up on my computer screen. Keep reading »

Girl Talk: I Can’t Get Over The Friend Who Dumped Me

I still don’t know why June* stopped talking to me.

We had been friends for over 10 years when she suddenly stopped answering my emails and calls. We hadn’t argued. She was OK. She simply disappeared from my life, and now five years later, I’m still obsessed with why. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: When Friends Interfere

I have been happily dating my boyfriend for one year now. I have always considered myself to be friendly with his friends, and vice versa. Of course, I’m grateful that everyone gets along so well, but recently, my boyfriend is becoming a little too close to my friends and I’m beginning to grow uncomfortable. Seeing a friend of mine run her fingers through my boyfriend’s hair was infuriating. I also found out that he had lunch recently with another friend of mine and never mentioned it to me. Most recently, while partying with a few friends, my boyfriend laid his head in a friend of mine’s lap. After this, I tried to confront him about my feelings, and he said he felt bad he had upset me, but he didn’t seem to see what the big deal was. I do trust him, but I feel like the whole situation is making me look like a fool. I have always known that he can be a flirt — it never really bothered me — but it’s different when it’s with my friends. I’m clearly just jealous, but I guess I’m wondering if it is unnecessarily so. This is one relationship issue where I can’t turn to my friends for advice… — Too Close For Comfort

Keep reading »

Why Do I Read Blogs Written By People I Don’t Like?

I have a weird confession to make, but I suspect I am not alone. I read blogs written by people I don’t like. I can think of two blogs written by people I don’t like that I read daily — dare I say, almost obsessively. And I can think of two more blogs that I read once a week, also written by people I don’t like. Keep reading »

Debate This: Are You Obligated To Hang Out With Your Significant Others’ Friends?

Let’s say you’re dating a guy and things are going great with one small exception — he has a friend you absolutely can’t stand. There could be a multitude of reasons you don’t like this person; maybe he makes nasty sexist or racist or homophobic remarks all the time and being around him just makes you feel really uncomfortable. Maybe you can’t stand the way he leers at you when your boyfriend isn’t looking. Maybe he dated a dear friend of yours and treated her like crap. Maybe he treats your own significant other like crap, but for whatever reason, your boyfriend is willing to put up with it. Does that mean you should? Even if it means watching this guy talk down to your man, belittle him, and say offensive things? Are you obligated, as a dutiful girlfriend, to spend time with everyone your significant other hangs out with simply because you’re part of a couple? Keep reading »

Land A Dude, Lose Two Friends

A new study done at Oxford University says that both men and women lose an average of two close friends when they get involved in a serious relationship. Why? Because we tend to have about four to six people in our “circle of trust.” When we get involved with a new person, our attention is so focused on our new partner that the time and energy costs us about two core friendships. The study also found that having a child or even getting a new pet can have the same effect. I don’t like this study one bit. I intend to prove it wrong. I vow to keep all of my close friends even if I ever land a boyfriend … or a kid … or a dog. But I don’t think my friends have anything to worry about for the time being. Womp womp. [Daily Mail] Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “My Friends Don’t Respect My Financial Limitations”

I recently married and bought a home. During this same time, I was laid off from my job and my husband’s income decreased drastically. We ended up moving in with my in-laws while we used all of our money to fix up the house. All of my girlfriends were in my wedding. I embraced their financial limitations, and made the most of it. If a girl couldn’t afford her dress, I offered to pay (at the time I was making significantly more than any of them). I looked past the fact no one threw me a bridal shower or bachelorette party. In the end, they only spent around $200 — for their dress. Now I am invited to countless birthday parties, nights out, and social events. I am having to decline most of these “social obligations” to sacrifice for my house. My friends are not taking this kindly; they are rude when I cancel most of the time. I feel that a caring friend would understand my situation and accommodate my friendship needs. As in, rented movies in, cook-outs at home, etc. What do I do if I cannot meet their financial expectations? — Lucky in Love But Not Money

Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “My Coupled Friends Have Discarded Me”

In basically the last month, all of my once single, once really close friends have paired off and cloistered themselves away for couple-activities. A part of me rolls my eyes at this nonsense, considering how young each relationship is and how serious it’s gotten in the last few days or so. Now, instead of going out on Fridays, the six of them stay in for movies or game night (which, obviously, needs even numbered teams). I’m not asking for a fix-up because I’m happy being single, considering we’re all still in college. But, my question is, do all relationships follow this same trend? Another of my friends has been in a relationship like this for over a year and she’s still in that giddy-never-wanna-leave-his-side mood and I’m afraid that the other three are going a similar way. Is it normal for the 7th wheel to be discarded at times like these? How can I bring it up to them while both getting my point across and without seeming like I’m judging anyone for the choices they’re making? — Odd Girl Out

Keep reading »

Girl Talk: I Called The Cops On The Roommate From Hell

“I almost woke you up in the middle of the night and asked you to take me to the emergency room. I thought I was dying,” she said with a wicked smile. “I swallowed more than 60 pills.”

Jerking her head as she talked, my roommate attempted to hide the gouges on her nose and cheeks. She had been picking apart her 24-year-old face for weeks.

I listened to her ramble on about how much money she’d spent on Adderall and cocaine. It was thousands. She seemed to take pleasure in her confession, lifting her sweater proudly, “Look how skinny I am.”

Finally able to speak, I urged, “You need help.”

“No, I’m good now. I was just in a funk.” Keep reading »

  • Zergnet: Simply Irresistible

  • HowAboutWe

  • Popular