A few weeks ago, my boyfriend came home from hanging out with his male cousin with a startling report: the cousin had an ugly, yellowing bruise on his upper arm. The cousin also needed to buy a new cell phone because his had been smashed. We noticed his Facebook status had been updated over the weekend to say that he’d made his recent ex-girlfriend cry.
“What happened?!” I gasped. My boyfriend shrugged.
“What, you didn’t ask?” I sputtered. These two are as close as brothers. They’ll be best men at each other’s weddings. But he shrugged again and responded, “I didn’t want to be nosy.” Keep reading »
Wendy is on vacation, so we’ll be posting some of her more popular past Dear Wendy columns (that some of you may have missed!) to get you through the week.
A year ago my best friend “Erin” fell MAJORLY in love over a long distance relationship with someone in Europe and this summer she moved there to be with her girlfriend. The girlfriend is still in school in another country, though, so Erin lives in her girlfriend’s hometown and they’ve only seen each other on vacations. I’m happy Erin is happy, of course, but the stuff she tells me about how her girlfriend, whom I’ve never met, for the record, treats her frightens me. She’s apparently pretty jealous and gets upset when Erin hangs out with other lesbians. She also has access to Erin’s Facebook page and email account, which means she can read all her messages. I told Erin it sounds controlling, especially since I send her emails about stuff in my personal life that I don’t necessarily want her girlfriend to read. Erin got really defensive and insists the email-reading doesn’t bother her because she has nothing to hide. I said it bothered me, though, because she shouldn’t have someone snooping through her private emails. Erin got frustrated with me, said she’s got “bigger things to worry about,” and completely changed the subject. I’m worried because Erin moved to Europe to be closer to her girlfriend and now she’s a little bit isolated from her friends and family. If this girlfriend continues to do these weirdly controlling things, I’m afraid we’re not going to know or be able to do anything about it. What more can I do? What more can I say? — Hates Snooping
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On last night’s season premiere of “My Boys” — which I watched after back-to-back amazeballs episodes of “True Blood” and “Mad Men” — there was this interesting subplot about how much friends’ opinions matter when it comes to relationships. The character of Kenny is dating this chick Stephanie, and Kenny’s friend Mike is really disbelieving that their relationship is genuine and for real. The whole thing got me thinking a bit about whether or not it actually matters what your friends and family think about your significant other. Should Kenny and Stephanie be bothering to try and “prove” anything to Mike? For this edition of “He Said/She Said,” I’ve brought in my brother-from-another-mother, John DeVore, to share his male perspective on the matter. Check out his thoughts and mine, after the jump. Keep reading »
It’s only natural to date someone in your circle of friends. But what happens when the relationship ends? How do you handle the next pool party or skiing invitation from your buddies, when you know he’ll be there, too? Whether you part on decent terms or really really bad ones, it’s going to get awkward. If you want to keep your friends, however, you’ll need to figure out a way to get along with your ex. After the jump, eight tips for getting along with an ex in your circle of friends. Keep reading »
Sometimes you hear women talk about how and why they stay friends with their exes and wonder how they do it. For some of us that seems impossible. After the jump, eight women share their thoughts about how they are able to keep friendships with exes. Keep reading »
It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Needs New Friends,” who had lost friends in her breakup and didn’t know how to make new ones or transition well into her new single life. After the jump, find how how she’s doing now six months later. Keep reading »
Megin and I first met as mid-level slaves to the fashion industry eight years ago. I recognized a kindred spirit the minute I caught her screaming harsh obscenities at her computer. We’ve been through boyfriend breakups, apartment break-ins, and career changes. So when she asked me to be a bridesmaid, I jumped at the chance to stand by her side and watch her start a new life with the man she loved. Of course I wanted to support her in any way possible on her big day; I just didn’t realize how much it would cost me! Keep reading »
There’s this thing called a girl crush, and we all have them. You don’t think you do? What about that girl in high school who had the best clothes? You always loved her fashion sense, and you occasionally go to her Facebook profile when a new album of hers pops up in your newsfeed. You long for her Chanel bag and adorable romper for a few minutes, and then you move on. That’s a girl crush! Or what about that friend of a friend who socializes in the same circle as you? Heads turn when she walks in the room, and you love that she speaks two languages fluently, just like you’ve always wanted to. That’s a girl crush, too. Sometimes, you can’t help but be attracted to qualities or characteristics in other women, whether they’re qualities you want or not. Keep reading »