When I was wee, I was best friends with the girls who were handy. Neighborhood kids, playgroup participants, and the like. In grade school, I gravitated toward girls who were brainy like me. Since book smarts were considered to be at odds with potential popularity, and since I had more going in the Brains Department than the Social Graces Department, I sought out equally bookish girlfriends. High school was pretty much the same as grade school, but in college, I ran with girls who shared classes, activities, or interests with me. And after college I befriended women who worked with me. Longstanding friendships from school and activities sometimes lingered, but new friends were drawn almost exclusively from my coworker pool. Keep reading »
Happy National Best Friends Day! (No, really. It is!) When it comes to major life transitions and decisions about careers, romantic entanglements, sexual dilemmas, health, and possibly marriage or motherhood, who’s got your back, ladies? That’s right, your girlfriends. In our lives we can’t cast the perfect variety pack of girlfriends, as the creators of “Sex and the City” did – nor would we want to, as gradually getting to know each other is the best part of a relationship – though, if we’re lucky, we do have different kinds of friendships we’ve accumulated over the years to suit the very different aspects of our complex lives. There are eight types of friendships I’ve cultivated that have been essential to my growth as a person. Too bad all these ladies don’t live locally (because a posse would be so nice!), so that I could get them together at the Sunday brunch table, but I can keep them on speed dial. Keep reading »
When I’m really upset there is only one person I want to talk with: my mom.
“Mom?” I said, my voice wobbling. “Ashley got into med school.”
“That’s great!” Mom exclaimed. Like me, my mother has known Ashley since we met in kindergarten.
“Yes … but … she got in med school in Israel. She’s moving to Israel in July.”
“Good for her!” My mother didn’t understand what I was trying to tell her.
“Well, yes, it’s good she got into med school, but Mom, she is moving to ISRAEL in less than two months. Friggin’ Israel. Another one of my best friends is moving away. I should just move across the Atlantic Ocean at this point.”
“Oh.” Pause. “Maybe you’ll make some new friends?” Keep reading »
For the longest time, I have only had one guy friend. And I used to date him, in college. Which complicates things. It makes my husband Bear uncomfortable. It makes me uncomfortable, too. Not the him being my friend part. That’s fine. It happened naturally. We’re horrible gossips together. But I wish I could erase our dating past. I shouldn’t have dated him. Even while I was dating him, I was hazily aware of that.
I am bad at guy friends. I have only had a few. Which makes me totally uncool, I know. Keep reading »
I use Facebook primarily for three reasons: To chat with my family members who live out of state, to share links of animals doing stupid cute things and occasionally, to stalk. I’m not talking about stalking exes, I’m not into that at all. I usually hide or unfriend them within moments of the breakup. I’m no masochist and looking at exes makes you feel like crap. I only engage in fun stalking. The kind that makes me feel good about myself. I like to creep on FB friends that I should probably unfriend. I just can’t because I enjoy following their every virtual move so much. After the jump, the Facebook friends you really should keep just for the hell of it. Keep reading »