Just like a superhero team or jewel thief gang needs each member to specialize in a different skill set, a good circle of friends also needs a wide range of useful skills. While a superhero team might need a guy who is superstrong and a guy who has a lot of gadgets, your friend team might consist of a guy who can get you discounts at the Best Buy and a guy who’s totally cool with feeding your cats when you’re out.
When I suggest assembling such a team, I’m not suggesting you go around preying on emotionally vulnerable people who can do useful things for you and pretend to be their friend. I’m just saying that if you happen to run into some cool people you enjoy hanging out with, who also own a pickup truck, don’t take them for granted.
Sure, you can have friends that are just fun people, or that you are fond of for no logical reason, but that doesn’t mean you don’t also want to have friends such as … Read more… Keep reading »
When I first met Ethan, I was in love with his friend.
Josh, however, was not in love with me, and told me so. We hadn’t been dating long, but I had met his mother over the holidays and thought things were getting serious, that we might have a future. When he assured me we didn’t, I felt confused, misled and heartbroken.
Ethan had no idea how I felt or that I had given up sugar, gluten, fried food, meat, dairy, alcohol and caffeine in an attempt to cleanse my body of the pain. Ethan had just moved to New York City and was simply looking to meet new people. I agreed to lunch, thinking Ethan might report back to Josh that I was cool and pretty, and what the hell was he thinking?! Keep reading »
In middle school and high school, it seemed like there was drama with friends every five minutes over stupid crap, like who was copying whose outfit, or who the cutest boy in school liked more. Now that we’re adults — well, most of the time — friend blowouts are few and far between. But when they happen, they are seriously gory. If I flip out on a friend, it has to be over something really major. Sometimes the friendships survive and get stronger and sometimes … not so much. After the jump, some Frisky staffers share their worst friend battles in recent history. Share yours in the comments. Keep reading »
There’s the age old question, “Can men and women just be friends?” But there’s a second question that’s practically as ancient: “Should you just be friends or take it to the next level?” The upcoming film “One Day,” starring Anne Hathaway and Jim Sturgess, explores that very notion by introducing audiences to Emma and Dexter, a pair of Brits that spend the night together their last night of college, and then decide to just be friends. The film — check out the trailer here — then shows them each year on the same date to see where they are in their lives. Sometimes they’re together, sometimes they not, but you’ll have to watch the movie to see whether they end up together in the end. Keep reading »
There’s this (amazing) song on the soundtrack to the (terrible) movie “The Romantics” called “We Can’t Be Friends” by Lenore Scafaria. My favorite lyrics go:
“I want to wear a skirt, I want to make mistakes,
I want to kill you first and then take your name,
I want to tear you apart, I want to make your bed,
I wanna break your heart, I want to break your head,
I guess this means we can’t be friends.”
In the days, weeks and months following a big breakup, I listened to this song on repeat. Every word of it spoke to me (especially the part about breaking his head). We’d said to each other on our first date, moony-eyed, that even if this didn’t grow into anything, we should still be friends.
Two years later, it couldn’t be more obvious that we could not be friends. My friends don’t sneak around behind my back. My friends don’t email me lists of the things they don’t like about me. My friends don’t threaten to throw out my stuff. There’s a hell of a lot of things my ex-boyfriend did that I wouldn’t stand for if one of my girl or guy friends were to do them. Why should I make concessions for acting like a d**k just because we had been in a romantic relationship together? What would that prove?
This cropped up again recently when a guy I’d been going on dates with for about a month ended it with me. Hormones, as I’ll call him, said he didn’t have strong enough romantic feelings or see long-term potential for us. Yadda yadda yadda. That is fine. I understand. I appreciate that he was honest about it. But then Hormones told me that he hoped we could be friends. Keep reading »