Tag Archives: feminism

Open Letter To The Man Who Propositioned Me For Sex On The Subway

Street Harassment
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Perv Problems
How do you stop a pervert from rampant perv-ing? Read More »
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Dear Man Who Propositioned Me For Sex On The Subway,

Why is it that after I respectfully responded “no, thanks” to your subway sex proposition, you found it necessary to call me a “bitch”? Have you not seen the movie “Shame”? Even an exceptionally fantastic looking guy like Michael Fassbender (who, might I add, was playing a sex addict) found it difficult to come on to a girl while riding the train because he feared rejection.

But you sir, wearing that hideous shirt, those skinny jeans which were obviously washed one time too many because they revealed your ankles, a pair of busted Converse, with a chip-toothed, yellow grin, thought that your offer to leave the train with you on 23rd street “to hang out at your house” should have been received with excitement. Keep reading »

Today’s Lady News: Olympic Beach Volleyball Players Allowed To Wear Shorts

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Olympic Spice
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Top 10 reasons the 2012 Olympics in London need the Spice Girls. Read More »
  • Female beach volleyball players at the 2012 Olympics will be allowed to wear shorts and sleeved tops during their games or they can wear the traditional bikinis, according to new rules from the International Volleyball Federation. The allowance has been made to be culturally sensitive to some countries who may have reservations about women competing showing so much skin, the org explained. [AP]
  • Massachusetts Senator Scott Brown is in hot water after publicly praising his daughters and wife for teaching him how to cook, clean and sew. [Huffington Post]
  • A Wisconsin conference for conservatives attended by several lawmakers this Saturday handed out anti-birth control literature to participants. [Think Progress]
  • Texas radio reporter Scott Braddock has allegedly lost his job for reporting on the state’s controversial, anti-abortion forced sonogram law. [Austinist Keep reading »

Today’s Lady News: Belvedere Vodka’s Rapey New Ad

Sexist Ads
Not all advertising campaigns are sexist and offensive. Read More »
rapey belvedere ad photo
  • Belvedere Vodka tweeted an ad recently where a man pulls an open-mouthed woman down onto his lap with the headline, “Unlike some people, Belvedere always goes down smoothly.” The company tweeted later that they were sorry “if any of our fans were offended,” although not for the actual creepy ad. The ad appears to have since been pulled. [Jessica Valenti]
  • Pennsylvania’s Governor Tom Corbett dismissed criticism of the state’s new forced ultrasound law for women seeking an abortion, compassionately stating, “You just have to close your eyes.” [Huffington Post]
  • PA state senator Larry Farnese has introduced a bill that would require men seeking Viagra to first undergo a prostate exam, a cardiac stress test, and sex therapy. [Nerve]
  • You know things are bad for women’s rights in America when a Republican Congressman is urging women to donate their money to Democrats, who he calls “people who speak out on our behalf.” [Daily Kos] Keep reading »

British Actor Helpfully Explains Why “It’s Not Difficult For A Woman To Make A Man Hit Her”

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On Abused Women
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“It’s not difficult for a woman to make a man hit her. … The problem with strong, intelligent women is that they can argue well. And if there is a time where you can’t get a word in … and I … I lashed out. I couldn’t end the argument. Something must have brought it on. When frustration builds up and you can’t think of a way out… It happened and I’m very, very ashamed of it. … She certainly wasn’t a beaten wife, she was hit and that’s different.”

I don’t know who the British actor Dennis Waterman is, but his why-I-punched-my-wife logic makes him sounds like he’s the Mel Gibson of the UK. The actor was on Piers Morgan’s talk shows discussing his rough 1998 divorce from actress Rula Lenska, who claimed he had a drinking problem and that he beat her. Dennis doesn’t dispute he had a hand in the drinking, but the hitting? Well, that’s just not his fault. (Of course not.)

Dennis has been condemned by the British anti-violence group Refuge, which issued a no-duh statement “No one can make their partner hit them.”  [The F Word via Mirror UK]

Today’s Lady News: AZ Grocer Covers Up Jessica Simpson’s Nude Magazine Cover

  • Look, I’m as sick of listening to Jessica Simpson talk about her copious amounts of amniotic fluid as you are. [I'm not sick of it! -- Editor] But really, Tucson, Arizona grocery store, was it necessary to cover up Jess’s naked, pregnant Elle magazine cover with a sign reading “Please Do Not Remove Cardboard”? [ABC News]
  • Abortion opponents performed six live ultrasounds in Idaho’s state capitol, where the legislature is debating forced ultrasounds for women seeking abortions. [Business Week]
  • New Hampshire’s state House voted to keep their law legalizing same-sex marriage in place. [Union Leader]
  • On why “choice” may not be the best framework to discuss women’s reproductive rights. [The Nation] Keep reading »

The Soapbox: On Consent Culture

I Was Date Raped
Amelia was date raped in college by a guy she liked. Read More »
New "Rape" Definition
A new definition of rape has been approved by the FBI. Read More »
Rape Checklist
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A handy checklist of things that cause rape. Read More »

Today I’m going to fulfill a promise I made quite a while ago, and talk about what a consent culture would look like.

A consent culture is one in which the prevailing narrative of sex — in fact, of human interaction — is centered around mutual consent.  It is a culture with an abhorrence of forcing anyone into anything, a respect for the absolute necessity of bodily autonomy, a culture that believes that a person is always the best judge of their own wants and needs.

I don’t want to limit it to sex.  A consent culture is one in which mutual consent is part of social life as well.  Don’t want to talk to someone? You don’t have to.  Don’t want a hug? That’s okay, no hug then.  Don’t want to try the fish? That’s fine.  (As someone with weird food aversions, I have a special hatred for “just taste a little!”)  Don’t want to be tickled or noogied? Then it’s not funny to chase you down and do it anyway.

The good news is, there are things you can do to bring this about.  Things beyond just “don’t rape people” (although that’s an excellent start). Keep reading »

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