Look at the graphic above. Believe it or not, one of the ridiculous campaign promises above was actually uttered by a presidential candidate. Yes, Newt Gingrich actually claims that, if elected, he’ll get a moon colony going by the end of his second term. That’s right America: You could be barbecuing on the moon by 2020 if Newt has his way. Newt’s plan would allow for the moon colony to apply for statehood once a population of 13,000 had been achieved. So yes, he’s thought of everything.
“I will, as president, encourage the introduction of the ‘Northwest Ordinance’ for space to put a marker down that we want Americans to think boldly about the future, and we want Americans to go out and study hard and work hard and together we’re going to unleash the American people to build the country we love,” Gingrich said in Florida this week, rather not coincidentally in an area hard hit by the cancellation of the space program.
Candidates will say anything to get elected, am I right? So we dreamed up a few other wild zingers we thought the President and Newt’s fellow Republican candidates might say. Enjoy!
Today is not the best day. But it’s going to get better. That’s what I tell myself, and this clearly traumatized, but very cute, wet kitten. [Buzzfeed]
Sex only makes things worse. Look, I only took that that napkin because I wrapped some chicken in it. Would I help if I told you were doing sexual espionage? Yes, we watched the “Shit Liz Lemon Says” video, even though that meme is so 18 seconds ago. Blerg! [Hollywood Reporter] Keep reading »
The new season of TLC’s “My Strange Addiction” is about to start, and while we’ve already been tipped off that this round will feature a woman who is addicted to eating cat food, we can’t imagine what other weird people with odd habits the show’s dug up. Remember Amelia’s boyfriend, hair drain guy? Or the woman whose frighteningly long nails made it nearly impossible for her to wipe her own butt?
To make your own viewing of “My Strange Addiction” more enjoyable, we’ve created this handy bingo card, with 16 possible addiction topics we think the show might feature. How to play: Print this card out. Every time we manage to hit the weird mark on the head, cross an addiction off the card. If we (or you) get the addictions in a horizontal, vertical or diagonal row, you win! (What, we’re not sure, because you’ve just watched, like, 10 episodes of “My Strange Addiction,” which sounds really depressing.)
Enjoy! (New episodes air February 12).
You can’t blame PBS for trying to make a buck. Even they hate their biweekly fundraising efforts. Nevertheless, the production company for “Downton Abbey” got on the horn and put a stop to PBS.org’s sale of a “Downton Abbey”-inspired jewelry line, which was in no way affiliated with the show. Keep reading »