So much happens in a week! It’s hard to keep it all straight. That’s why we’re keeping track for you, with our new helpful charticle, Totally Awesome, Totally Crap, which highlights the best and worst of the past seven days. This week: We’re loving Adele giving the middle finger at the Brit Awards. You do not cut off Adele. We’re also super stoked that “Community” — the best, most underrated show on TV — will officially be returning on March 15. Also getting the thumbs up: Zac Efron “accidentally” dropping a condom at the premiere of his new movie, “The Lorax.” Hooray for using protection! I am secretly hoping it’s because he’s boning the Lorax.
Totally sucky this week? Rihanna recording a song with ex-lover/beater/total shitbird Chris Brown. We’re also kind of disgusted that Bobby Brown is writing a tell-all. Too soon! Plus, what don’t we know about you after we watched you pull poop out of Whitney’s ass on your reality show? Beyond that — is there no such thing as deep, unabiding, trustful love anymore? Jessica Biel doesn’t think so, which is why she’s reportedly making Justin Timberlake sign a pre-nup that grants her at least $500,000 every time he cheats. True love is dead.
The Academy Awards are this Sunday, and we’ll definitely be watching. To make it more exciting — and because the ceremony is usually at a minimum four hours long — we’ve created a handy drinking game to make the Oscar festivities more fun, and more drunk-y than usual. Click after the jump for all rules and regulations!
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Ladies, your man must really love you, if he is willing to give in and let you do a “Twilight”-inspired engagement photo sesh. That’s at least my thinking behind the engagement photos of couple Lindsay and Ferdinand, which attempt to exactly replicate all the vampire angst of the movie series. More pics after the jump. [Every Last Detail Blog]
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Beware if you are planning to visit the Caribbean island of St. Kitts. There are a species of monkeys that will steal your fruity rum drink with the paper umbrella while you tan. BBC’s “Weird Nature” featured a segment about vervet monkeys, the alchies of the animal kingdom. And I’m kind of obsessed. But unlike us humans, the drunkest monkeys are the most well respected. I challenge you not to enjoy every moment of this video. Especially the part where the wasted monkeys roll around on the picnic table. You are welcome.
See larger image here.
“Mad Men” returns from its eons-long hiatus on March 25. That gives us just a month to get back into all the couplings, breakups and make ups that Don Draper and pals were embroiled in. Luckily, the folks at Wired have created this handy relationship map — which includes trysts we’d like to see — to help get us back in the game.
These adorable little fluffernutters are a little bit cranky this morning. They’ve just been woken up by their owner, and would probably prefer to get another 12 hours of nap time in. These little British Shorthair kittens just wanna sleep, dammit, but since they’re up, would you mind getting them a bowl or three of milk? [The FW]