Tag Archives: dating

Dear Wendy: “My Boyfriend Rejects My Gifts”

I am in a fairly new but happy relationship with a sweet, doting guy. I take issue, however, with his constant preoccupation with money. He doesn’t make much, but we’re both young and he has a better job than most people our age. His parents, who both struggle financially, seem to talk about money all the time, and have passed it on to him. I have already brought it up to him in a gentle way, that talking about money makes me uncomfortable and that unless he has a specific complaint he’d like to discuss or share with me, I don’t want to hear it. Now, since things are getting more serious, gifts are entering the equation. I bought him a thoughtful, not terribly expensive birthday present, and since I’m in a foreign country right now, I’ve picked up and sent a few souvenirs to him and his younger siblings (I know that they don’t get gifts very often). Basically, I haven’t been showering him with treasures, but I relish the fact that my ungrateful brother isn’t the only guy I can satisfy my menswear shopping cravings through. My guy seems pretty uncomfortable, even though I reassure him all the time that the little things he’s gotten me (as well as the pricey plane ticket he bought to come see me) mean a ton. I don’t care how much he has, and I wish he didn’t reject my trinkets. I really love giving gifts and can afford it at the moment, but he just seems a little uneasy and whines about how he can’t get me anything in return. What should I do? — Money Isn’t Everything

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Do You Believe In Astrological Compatibility?

I’m an Aries. That means I’m bossy, love to be number one, and am totally stubborn. I think Aries have some positive traits, too, but right now I can’t remember any of them. I read my horoscope daily, and the one I read tends to be pretty spot-on, so I guess you could say I believe in astrology, but I take it with a grain of salt. When it comes to astrological compatibility, I’m on the fence. According to astrology, there are signs I’m supposed to date and signs I’m not supposed to date. Sometimes, this has proven right, but sometimes it’s proven totally wrong. Plus, what about Chinese astrology, wherein your birth year dictates who you are and who your best mate is? Oftentimes, Chinese compatibility seems at odds with regular astrology, and … and … who knows what to believe anymore. Do you believe in astrological compatibility? Have the stars been right about your astrological hook-ups — or wrong? Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “My Friend Set Me Up With A Sizeist Jerk”

Through a friend, I got the email and phone number of a guy who does home repairs. My cousin needed work done on her house, but never had much time to make arrangements, so I made the appointments for her. The work was done wonderfully and at a great price, so I sent an email thanking him and praising his work, using a lot of specifics. He sent an email saying he was impressed by my knowledge of construction. I responded that my father had been a carpenter. He sent me his IM information, and we began chatting. He asked me out after a couple of weeks and we made plans to meet up for a movie. I told him I would be wearing jeans and a green top. He said I probably looked really good in size 3 jeans. I never said I wore a size 3 and replied that I actually wear a size 14. Now I’m healthy, and few would consider me fat. My jean size is due to big hips and a big butt. I got an IM later that night saying he didn’t date fat girls. He went on to say that they where disgusting and when I went down a few sizes he would consider going out with me again.

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What’s The Biggest Relationship Myth?

Relationships: not easy to have, but certainly easy to have an opinion on. We’ve all been given advice on how to make a relationship work, but some advice is better than others, at least according to therapist and relationship expert Dr. Terri Orbuch. Orbuch analyzed some of the most common relationship myths and came up with the top four worst relationship mythologies. At the top of the list? The idea that opposites attract. Because life isn’t a Paula Abdul video, superficial differences can be fine, but couples need to agree on basic life values. What else does Orbuch say you should watch out for? Keep reading »

Dear Wendy Updates: “Love My Nosy Mom” Responds

It’s time again for “Dear Wendy Updates,” a feature where people I’ve given advice to in the past let us know whether they followed the advice and how they’re doing today. After the jump, we hear from “Love My Nosy Mom,” the woman whose mother, with whom she was very close, was giving her grief about letting her new boyfriend of a couple months move in with her rent-free at the end of the school year. A lot of us said things along the lines of: “Well, maybe your mom has a point!” We also told her that maybe at 28 it’s time to be more selective about what she shares with her mom if she doesn’t always like her reaction. After the jump, find out what LMNM thought of our advice. Keep reading »

Dear Wendy: “I Gave My BFF A Place To Stay And Now I Feel Taken Advantage Of”

My best friend of 11 years has been living with my fiancé and me for the past two months because she’s having marital issues, and after a year of marriage isn’t sure she wants to be married anymore. I have been nothing but supportive, not judging her. She has been living with us for free (including food) as she has to still pay half her mortgage and household bills. In the beginning of all this, she had started a “flirtation” with a guy at work, meeting him for dinner, and talking to him every day after work and before bed. His true colors started to show so she slowly moved away. Since then, she has started texting someone we work with, and being secretive about it. One night she said she’d be home around 10, but didn’t come back until 1:30. She said she had been home hanging out with her husband and fell asleep on the couch. I think she was with the new guy. Today, when she was in the shower, I checked her texts and there is definitely something going on with them. I feel hurt and like I can’t trust her. We opened our home to her and I feel like she is abusing my trust. I know I should not have looked at her texts, but my gut told me something was going on. I talked to my fiancé about it and he wants to tell her to leave. I don’t want to send her packing, but at the same time I am feeling very used. What should I do? — Feeling Taken Advantage Of

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